My home is a mess

sonastin

Buffy - one thing I used to try to do when it was all getting on top of me and I was getting into the "I don't feel like I can cope so I'm going to not do it so that I don't get it wrong so I feel like !!!!!! for not doing it and feeling like !!!!!! makes me feel like I can't cope" cycle...

Leave your crappy-uncoping self at home and go out in a "fancy dress" of the person you'd like to be. If you end up doing or saying something stupid which would ordinarily make you feel like a complete **** (insert usual derogatory term here), you can just laugh it off because its not really "you", its your character that messed up. Its all well and good being told to be yourself but when you get into a state where you don't like yourself then be someone else you do like instead. Eventually you can drag yourself out of the black mood and find that the "character" you've been playing is actually yourself after all.

And as for dates, take the advice that is usually given for job interviews - even if you don't feel it, its worth going anyway just to get the practice ready for the real thing! Sometimes the ones that you think aren't right turn out to be the perfect fit

snookey

Thanks JP. Iv changed ours and daughters bedding and sorted the dirty washing into colours ready to wash.
Buffy I wish I was as clever as you. Lets face it you have to have brains to teach. Sometimes we need to remind ourselves of the things we have acheived and bury the negatives.Please stop being so hard on yourself.

aklmatthews

Hi I would love to join you and hope it will give me thepush I need to get my house sorted I have been of work sick for a couple ofmonths my illness makes me very tied and breathes very quickly and I have alsobeen suffering stress and depression I havenot come on her to moan just trying to explain how I have got in to a mess I amnaturally quite tidy my family say obsessive and like everything organised butat the minuet my house is a mess I haveonly been doing the very basics putting potsin dishwasher whipping kitchen sidesdown daily cleaning bathroom and a copal of loads of washing a couple of timesa week so everything needs tidying dusting the windrows all need cleaning ovenneeds cleaning freezer needs defrosting and much more which is making me more depressed and I really want to get it all sortedmy husband is very good but is working long shifts to try and make up for nothaving my wages he has been doing most of the cooking and shopping I know I needto do a bit at a time but just do not know where to start sorry for such a longpost but I just needed to tell someone how I was felling and I am hoping thiswill help me start to deal with it

Emm-in-a-pickle

Welcome, Gillybean and Alkmatthews! Nobody here needs to apologise for a Messy Moan - it`s what we do! It helps!
Laurel - reading about your garden makes me so admire your efforts.... everytime I look out of the back windows here even MORE of the wrong bits are burgeoning out of control - again!
Yorkshirelass - behind my computer is also one of my worst patches - mind you there`s lots of other areas competing for the title!

Buffy and Kitty - and anyone else contemplating Single & Daft status -
nothing daft about it, I reckon...DAFT, is considering yourself somehow a `lesser` being for not being in a conventional `relationship`. or getting into/going along with one that isn`t right for you, just for the sake of it.

Snookey - I`m glad your dad is doing well, and you`re RIGHT to nag him if you feel you have to!! And I LOVE your "No Tidy Day"!!!!
Kitty - FOUR binbags! Well done you. Though at the moment I feel I could fill a large skip and the house would hardly look any better!

HUGS((()))to all those going back to work after the holidays. I am now on Day One of my week off. I`ve spent so long promising myself that THIS WEEK I will do stuff, and all I`ve done today is have a lie-in and wash up yesterday`s pots. And read here, and give myself caffeine poisoning...

Emm-in-a-pickle

Last week I had an Early shift on the Friday and went shopping straight after work. Bought a drop-leaf table with chairs that stash inside the middle bit. Spent the rest of the day clearing the corner of LR that it now occupies...this meant emptying & removing the shelves from that corner, and moving sofa to clean the corner. Well, it was like domeswtic archaeology! The table looks good, that small corner is Clean & Tidy - but there`s a storage box full of `stuff` from the old shelves, still sitting there on the sofa...not sorted. Still, I felt SO good, like I`d made a good head start for getting stuff done in my week off.
Now, I`m wondering where to start next, and thinking there must be more to life than this...I KNOW I`ll feel better once I start, but this inertia is really dragging on.

Gillybean103

Morning all

Woke up late again, quite a nice day out, I've got some washing on the line that I did late yesterday. Made OH tea to take to work, written a shopping list for the week.

So ive got to do the shopping
Pick some make up up from boots that wasn't in stock last week
There is a new sue Ryder superstore opened in town so thought I'd pop and have a look ( my first venture into a charity shop)
Need to find a recipe for a healthy muesli type bar to make
Put shopping away
Clean kitchen
Do some ironing

I think that will do for today

jpscloud

Welcome aklmatthews and gillybean!Emm I so understand about the inertia. I've just had two weeks off, and although I did have to do a lot of family duties I still could have done something towards making things better messywise - but I used the time to shut down and totally rest. Maybe that was the right thing to do, or maybe I should have given myself a kick up the bum. I feel better for the rest anyhow!

aklmatthews

Well I have not made a very good start all I have done isput washing to dry strip the bed and empty dishwasher I did not get to sleep untilabout 6 this morning so I was not felling very good this morning I think I amgoing to cook diner today I have not cooked for ages so it will make a changeand hopefully I will tidy bedroom before making bed if I give it a good tidy today I can dust and hover tomorrow

fannyadams

Hi to all the new people and the old ones too - Wow! isn't it a lovely community we've got here...
Here come the hugs {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} I hope I've put enough here, if you put the spares in your pockets they multiply in the dark (I can do science me, so I know these things)

Well, it's official I'm unemployed! :T Got made redundant at the end of last month and have spent the easter hols with the kids and doing nothing. This morning I dropped DS#1 at school and spent two hours at C's with E&E (they are all SAHMs) drinking coffee and trying to understand how the other half live. Not sure I can do this every morning, but I could get used to it.

Now both DS's are back to school this week I thought I'd better pull my weight at home. Whilst job searching, signing on and waiting for my redundancy cheque to make me mortgage free :j of course.
Spent today making a list of stuff I want to get done (usual stuff like tidy up and put away, not ironing or eBay but these are further down the list), and only managed to get the porch done (sort out and put away coats, sort out kidz boxes of hats/scarves/gloves etc, relocate spiders, etc) still it's one less thing on the list. AND I sewed up DS#1's coat where he'd torn the loop for hanging it up which is a real achievement as I can't really sew properly (cuz I can't see close up and I'm too vain for glasses).
Spent most of this afternoon teaching DS#1 about acids and bases (title - "how to antacids work?") for school. He's back tomorrow and has left it to the last minute for his homework :mad:. I even asked him 3 times over the holidays if he had any homework and every time he said no! :rolleyes - I'm sick of picking him up at 4pm after detention for not doing his homework, or I'd have let him suffer the consequences AGAIN! Although I will be training him to use the bus very soon in anticpation of return to full time employment)

Right, I just have to get off my butt and put the last few bits away from the front room and then I'm off out to collect DS#2 from footy practise. He's in for a surprise when he gets home. His room is a real tip as I have done nothing in there today except dump his stuff in there and run out again.:rotfl:
My room's just the same, but I think the bed's clear for HWTHMBO when he comes home tonight. might get a minute to do it whilst DS#2 is tidying up his room before we go out to martial arts practise.
I'll post my achievements on here as you're right it does motivate you to get it done if you've got someone who'll notice.
catch you all later.
FA
xx

Emm-in-a-pickle

FA#1!!! Welcome back! Sounds like the redundancy thing has its perks!
Make the most of it!
Aklm - sounds like you`re getting somewhere...and Gillybean too.