My home is a mess

dibuzz

I've given up too, thanks to youngest 2 running roundtelling tales and twisting things no2 son's fiancee rang me and said I'm never seeing my grandson again and I'm dead to them.
Not that I saw much of him anyway, probably not seen him for more than 6 hours in total since he was born 10 months ago and they only live round the corner.
You won't believe how close I was to jumping off a bridge before but I'd made the mistake of taking the dog and didn't want her run over.
Not sure how much more I can take.

jpscloud

Hi messies, been MIA for a while, nothing serious, just tired.

Dibuzz just wanted to post quickly to say I am thinking of you and I'm glad that the dog kept your feet on the ground. It's crazy how cruel people can be - even our closest. I hope to goodness that you feel better soon.

I have managed to tackle the weight issue a bit over the last couple of weeks, and have lost about half a stone, possibly a little more. I've cut down what I eat at work, and had cereal when I got home in the evenings to cut my appetite down a bit. It's worked!

I usually weight myself in the evening, but I couldn't resist hopping on the scales yesterday morning. I thought I hadn't lost anything, as the scales were in the same position between one stone marker and the next... then realised that it was a stone lower than before! :rotfl:

By evening I'm a few pounds heavier of course, so i isn't really a whole stone lost. And at my size, losing the first half stone to a stone is easier than for someone who is closer to a healthy weight. But still, I'm very happy.

The house is still a mess, but hey ho. :cool:

snookey

Dibuzz thats sounds so awful no wounder you end up feeling so stressed.
Family life can be a so fraught at times.
Your sons partner should act like an adult and find out the facts before having ago at you.. Why are your children telling tales and causing trouble.
Hugs to you and try and concentrate on your needs .

Emm we will be having weird suppers when we get to the end of the freezer. Its a good way of coming up with new meals though.

Sonastin good for you taking a stand now its getting him to feel guilty and do the housework,lol.

Buffy hope your pains have gone,hugs.

Iv mostly stayed in bed but have had to put some washing in the machine. I dont trust oh to do it although he and the children have been doing a lot.

Im not meant to stand on my foot but the crutches are impractical on the landing and Im not great at hopping. Hoping Im not doing anymore damage. We do have a stairlift so thats a bonus.

Emm its my cuboid bone according to my letter for the hospital but she mentioned the heel too. Ill wait until the hospital on Wed to find out.

Anyway folks Im going to hop off.

Thrifty_Fashionista

Oh Dibuzz U poor thing. I sometimes wonder why life is so testing? I found out this week THE EX is seeing someone new, and it has really brought me down.
I just fight tears all the time.

We are good people, one day things have got to take a sudden change, and life will work out.

keep positive,

TF x

Buffythedebtslayer

dibuzz wrote: »

I've given up too, thanks to youngest 2 running roundtelling tales and twisting things no2 son's fiancee rang me and said I'm never seeing my grandson again and I'm dead to them.
Not that I saw much of him anyway, probably not seen him for more than 6 hours in total since he was born 10 months ago and they only live round the corner.
You won't believe how close I was to jumping off a bridge before but I'd made the mistake of taking the dog and didn't want her run over.
Not sure how much more I can take.

Dibuzz, these people don't need to be in your life, you brought them up you looked after them for what ever reason they are NOT treating you well. So they can sod off.

Please find something to occupy your time with, mindless crap will do for now but the single most important thing any of us can do is have ideas and actions that mean our happiness isn't based on other people. Cos sometimes other people can be !!!!.

Post here every day, read, write, walk, do something but try as hard as you can to fight any bridge wanderings. YOU WILL GET THROUGH THIS. People do it every day and you are one of those people.

Massive hugs

Buffy XX

Emm-in-a-pickle

Dibuzz, what a horrible patch you`re going through - it WILL pass, but really your kids (& the fiancee) need their heads banging together! Keep calm, and keep posting here - we`re on your side. (HUGS)

Snookey, keep delegating!

JPS, good to hear from you, and congrats on the weight loss.

Well, off I go again in a few minutes on another late shift. At least I haven`t had the `Monday morning` carp! It`s a quick sausage, egg & bacon tonight then up for an early tomorrow.
Have a decent day everyone. x

roobarb3

:AThankyou all for your very kind words and welcome:

snookey, yorkshirelass, emm-in-a-pickle.

Dibuzz sending lots of hugs . Try and rise above it and think about yourself for a change i know it is easier said than done , sometimes i just think sod it i am doing something or going somewhere today for me,just baby steps i sometimes go to the library and have a coffee read a magazine ,go round the beauty counters and spray myself with stuff and slather on some of there potions they some times give me freebies , then skip of home .Feeling a bit better about myself . x:A

sonastin

Right Dibuzz - its time to start getting tough. Time for you to be selfish. Forget all these people around you exist... what do YOU want out of YOUR life? That is what you have to focus on. If the others can fit into that, great. If not, tough. It is your life and you have to live it in the best way that you can.

I was at a seminar last week with a speaker I've heard before & I think you would really benefit from some of her help. The gist of her training is that stress is actually a choice - not an easy choice mind but it is up to us how we choose to react to the events in our life that are upsetting us. So it is time to fight back - not against your family but against your own mind. Choose to focus on the things that you enjoy that are in your control. Choose to let go of the upsetting things that are outside your control. Choose to make yourself happy because, lets face it, the folks around you aren't going to do anything to help (except perhaps eldest and dog!). When you're better the others might just fall into line a bit more too.

Please don't think this is just another "pull yourself together" line - I know (from experience) that it isn't that simple. But actually it is that simple in principle, just bloomin' hard to do. It really is worth the all the effort - but you have to put you first in order for it to work.

And it really can be simple stuff. If you want to not clean the house, don't clean the house. If you want a clean bedroom, just clean it (even if its DD's bedroom we're talking about!). Be grown up about facing the consequences (if what you really want is no shouting match with DD, don't clean her room but accept that it's your choice to avoid the shouting match. If you'd rather have a clean room, be ready to shout back. YOU CHOOSE!)

I know it is hard but believe me, living with depression is a lot harder.

snookey

Emm hope your shift is an easier one. Its daft having a late shift followed by an early. Its not giving you much respite in between. Im delegating dont worry.

Dibuzz things are never as bleak as they appear. Keep going dont give up.

Thrifty you will find someone else and then the hurt will ease.

Now Im about to have my coffee by my son. A broken foot comes in handy sometimes,lol.

jpscloud

Roobarb, I forgot to say welcome to you in my post yesterday! Sorry, and welcome! :wave: If I've missed any other new posters please forgive me, give me a kick up the backside and I will give you a welcome in return

Dibuzz, hope you are feeling better. I have a family member that I love very much, but he can be so unkind. He doesn't mean to be, it's just his way and he'll never change, but I've had to do a lot of forgiving over the years.

I do hope things improve soon and the advice about looking after YOU is very good too. You have your own intrinsic worth and no one can take that from you no matter how rotten they are to you.

Thanks for the congrats Emm, I have been here before and then fell off the wagon - I'm a serial yo-yo'er but get bigger on each alternate yo. Turning 50 means I can't afford to be such an unhealthy weight any more, so I hope this time the motivation is stronger. It feels like it is.

Good luck with all the carp you have to put up with messies - I have just this week and next week before half term, hooray! I need to winter-proof the house as much as I can so that might be a good opportunity.