My home is a mess

grandmasam

Dibuzz, I second scaredycat!
Get a large roll of black bin liners , and shovel stuff in,from both rooms. Mix well in each bag, place near front door. Say nothing to either child about what is in them and dispose of next bin day.
I did this with each of my dkids when they were at there most untidy and it worked. I did ban dd from bringing any sack in, cue lots of drama! She even tried to get her dad to store 'her' sacks. When he saw the number and size he said no. Result!
Good luck hun,
Caz

Emm-in-a-pickle

Dibuzz ((Hugs)) You could try the bin bag thing as suggested, I particularly like the idea of asking their dad to take some away pending sorting! You said they `moan to their dad` that you want them to sort their mess. Is he aware how bad their mess is? It doesn`t sound like he`s been very helpful but if he saw how bad it is he might be shocked into sensible parent mode....?

dibuzz

Their dad has seen their rooms and knows how bad they are but blames me for it. He always comments on any mess in here which is usually what the kids have refused to take away.
The best thing is, he never took anything away when he was here either.

scaredy_cat

do some black bags for him as well!!

Emm-in-a-pickle

Why does this not surprise me? From what you`ve told us already, your daughter is working and you do everything for her. Maybe it`s time to think of more drastic action. Tell her she has to clean up - or Move Out! Even if Mr Unhelpful (her dad) took her in, she`s old enough to give her the ultimatum.
I know it may sound hard, but it just sounds like between them they`ve got you in bits, you must stand up to them.

JIL

dibuzz wrote: »

Their dad has seen their rooms and knows how bad they are but blames me for it. He always comments on any mess in here which is usually what the kids have refused to take away.
The best thing is, he never took anything away when he was here either.

I know its drastic, but as a solution to their mess.

Is it worth you swapping rooms with your daughter?

The two messy children would be upstairs and you could say the downstairs is yours. Then all you have to do is just keep shoving their mess into their rooms and closing the door.

bluebag

dibuzz wrote: »

Their dad has seen their rooms and knows how bad they are but blames me for it. He always comments on any mess in here which is usually what the kids have refused to take away.
The best thing is, he never took anything away when he was here either.

I said I would not be going into my girls' rooms anymore as they were entitled to their privacy (LOL) so it's closed door policy here.

I don't like it as I know there is a biohazard 5 zone behind those oh so flimsy doors, but whatever... I'm too kNakkered to sort their kipple out, I can barely cope with my own.

Anyway, how will they learn how to do it if I keep sorting it out for them?

dibuzz

Thanks everyone, I know it's my fault for doing everything for them.
I didn't want them to feel in the way like I did as a child so have always done whatever I could for them.

JIL I'd love to swap rooms but my room was originally hers and she would never fit all her stuff in there. She promised she would sort everything out if she had the downstairs room when her brother moved out. I wanted to have it back as a living room again but as usual I gave in, partly so my eldest could have his own room at last.

I've managed to sort out some of youngest's clothes, still not enough to out them all in his room but it's a start.

I think I need someone to come in and blitz the whole house, I might be able to keep up if I wasn't always meeting myself coming back.

bluebag

dibuzz wrote: »

Thanks everyone, I know it's my fault for doing everything for them.
I didn't want them to feel in the way like I did as a child so have always done whatever I could for them.

JIL I'd love to swap rooms but my room was originally hers and she would never fit all her stuff in there. She promised she would sort everything out if she had the downstairs room when her brother moved out. I wanted to have it back as a living room again but as usual I gave in, partly so my eldest could have his own room at last.

I've managed to sort out some of youngest's clothes, still not enough to out them all in his room but it's a start.

I think I need someone to come in and blitz the whole house, I might be able to keep up if I wasn't always meeting myself coming back.

They will grow then they will go and then you will miss them... and all their mess. Think about it in 100 years who will care?

greengoblin

bluebag wrote: »

They will grow then they will go and then you will miss them... and all their mess. Think about it in 100 years who will care?

If it is impinging on your quality of life now and making you miserable it needs sorting NOW. Don't give in to lazy children, you have your own life - be strong - we're here and you can do it dibuzz :T