Seriously need help...please :)

Zoetoes

elisebutt65 wrote: »

LOW WAGE????? FGS - I only make £10300 per year - and I'm a single mum!!! ( I have just applied for another job on a salary of 14000 - FT) God - If I can manage it then so can you!!!!

I only get £22/pw HB so I doubt that you'll get any with your partner's salary

There's 2 of them and only 1 of you?

quintwins

theres 2 of us and 3 kids and including any tax credits ect we get £22,000 and we manage fine, granted we don't have many treats and our rent eats into it but really £17,000 should be doable aslong as you have no debts and are wise with your money

Bunii_Hugz

elisebutt65 wrote: »

LOW WAGE????? FGS - I only make £10300 per year - and I'm a single mum!!!

I too earn around 11k a year, I am 20 years old, I work full time, I am a single mum and being money smart means my little girl wants for nothing and we have our little treats now and again

Seriously get a grip ! Elisebutt is correct in saying 17K isnt a low wage ... stick to death of this 'hand out society' we have on our hands

elisebutt65

Zoetoes wrote: »

There's 2 of them and only 1 of you?

And? He earns £7G more than me - how much more does one more adult cost? Utilities will be the same more or less, It's usually cheaper to cook in bulk and freeze. I get most of the kids and my consumables(clothes etc) from EBay so save a small fortune there - and with a 6'2", size 11, permanently hungry spotty teenager(Zit cream etc) - I need to - lol.

On that salary I would rate myself as raking it in - I managed to take us off to Disneyland in California last year through planning and saving, that was before I went onto salary as well! I could afford Florida after a couple of years on that salary:D

viktory

Sweetie_Jo wrote: »

What is wrong with you people? I have been paying into the system since I was 16 years old!!

Sorry to be the bearer of bad news Sweetie, but paying tax and NI is not a savings account. An ISA, however, is. Hope this helps

seven-day-weekend

Sweetie_Jo wrote: »

I should not be judged by wanting to watch my child grow up!!

Of course not. I did that too for several years. But you should not expect State Benefits for doing so.

kingfisherblue

As others have said, you will not be awarded income support or anything other than CB and CTC (possibly a small amount of working tax credit? The cut off point is around £17000).

When I had my first child, now almost 20 years old :eek: (gosh, I feel old now!), I reduced my hours from full time to three days a week, and I was back at work by the time she was three months old as I couldn't afford any more time off.

My son was born with severe disabilities and even then, I returned to work when he was four months old - luckily I worked in a small firm and they werre very accommodating when I had to change my days of work to get to the many appointments with a multitude of specialists.

I now have three children and since their births, my ex and I have divorced. I had given up work after my third child, as my mum couldn't look after my children (my dad had just started to show signs of dementia).

My son's needs have increased as he has grown, and at twelve, he still needs a great deal of care both day and night. As a result, I cannot work at the moment, altohugh I still hope to do so in the future.

Now, I'm not looking for sympathy, but I am telling my tale to point out the type of family that needs the benefits safety net. I paid my taxes, as did (and still does) my ex. Even if I hadn't, our welfare state would have been there to support me and my children in very difficult circumstances.

Although I am sympathetic to your plight, you are not the only family struggling. My ex was always on low wages and I worked in a shop (when the NMW came in, my former colleagues would have received a raise of around £2 an hour). I had to learn to budget when my wages reduced along with my hours.

If you do give up work, how much will you save on travel expenses, lunches, work clothes, nursery fees, etc? You might find that you can manage on just one wage, albeit with careful budgeting.

Bunii_Hugz

kingfisherblue wrote: »

Now, I'm not looking for sympathy, but I am telling my tale to point out the type of family that needs the benefits safety net.

Sweetie_Jo I hope this small exert goes some way to explaining why not many of us seem sympathetic towards you ... the benefits system is a modern day safety net to try and help when things are at there toughest ! As kingfisherblue demonstrates there were a multitude of factors that were thrown at her feet before she felt she had to give up work ... it was not a choice for her

I hope after reading the above comment you feel somewhat ashamed of being so 'flippant' and rude about the whole thing

RuthMarianna

I have read right through this thread and I feel very sad. I am 57 and my children have all grown up and I have 1 grandchild. I have seen how things for mothers has changed so drastically. My mother was expected to give up work when she got married and she brought me and my brothers and sisters up on my fathers wages with no other help and while money was tight we had happy secure childhoods with Mum in the kitchen making dinner when we got home from school. We did not always go on holiday or have expensive gifts but we were happy and my Mum had time to teach us to cook and lots of others useful skills.

When it was my turn I stayed home with my children and only got nelp other than child benefit after my husband died when I got widowed mothers allowance. I tried to work but it was a nightmare with no available childcare so after a couple of years I gave up.

Now I see my daughter working full time with my grandson being cared for by us or nursery. My daughter does very well and likes to work but I see how difficult organising everything is. She never has any time to herself and is always stressed. I am proud of how she copes and my grandson is happy and well balanced but I just feel sad that we have lost something. Parents have to pay for others to do much of the parenting for them. I would like us to live in a society where parents and in particular mothers are valued for their role as mothers and the contribution they make to society. When we treat parenthood as a hobby that people do in their spare time we will end up with problem children in the future. I think women should go on strike from having children for a few years until mothers are valued and allowed to spend time as mothers without apology.

Bunii_Hugz

The problem with that is I work full time, am 20 years old and have a 18 month old daughter, I pay my way and hers ... yet I am ment to pay for this woman to be a stay at home mum ? I dont think so

If I could earn what I earn now, not work and spend all my time with my daughter of course I would ! But if everyone took that attitude the country would be in an even worse state ... luckily the benefit system doesnt allow this so I dont feel im getting the short end of the stick. My daughter will grow up seeing me working, not claiming every benefit under the sun