Seriously need help...please :)

Orville

dmg24 wrote: »

Have corrected your post for you.

Now what's the word for people that choose to live on benefits ...

Shouldn't the question be.....

What's the word for a sad old woman who comes on here with her unconstructive one liners every day..?

Jog on.....

michelle1506

Unfortunately, as you are finding out there is a distinct 'anti benefit brigade' on this forum.

In case anyone is wondering, I work full time, and have done for many years. Even as a student I held down two jobs! I am about to start maternity leave, and will be going back to work afterwards for 20+ hours per week AND claiming WORKING FAMILIES TAX CREDIT!

I worked from the age of 15 and I am now 42 and have not yet had a family. I have only had two VERY BRIEF spells of unemployment in that time, and got work very quickly.

So as far as I am concerned I am ENTITLED TO CLAIM SOMETHING BACK FOR ALL THE CONTRIBUTIONS THAT I HAVE MADE for all those years! Sorry if that doesn't appeal to some people..:mad:

Sweetie_Jo wrote: »

What is wrong with you people? I have been paying into the system since I was 16 years old!!

Unless I am an millionaire, how can anyone afford to have children!?

Cheapskate

I've read this thread with interest - lots of strong opinions!

DH & I have 5 children - 24, 22, 19, nearly 4 & 18 months. (Older 2 not living at home now). When our older three were little I didn't go to work, we just received CHB, but as DH & I grew up in poorer households we knew how to manage on very little & DH has ALWAYS worked. When the older kids were at school I worked in education establishments, so I didn't have to organise or pay for childcare. Since we had the youngest two, I've realised how much more generous the welfare system is than 20-odd years ago. DH runs his own business now, pays himself £800 a month, I now earn £65 a month. On top we receive £800 TC etc - to my mind it's a sinful amount of cash, but during these few months of getting the business going it's been a godsend, but the minute DH can pay himself more, TC will - rightly - reduce. We've been able to save a little bit out of TC cos I know there'll be a big reduction come the summer.

Part of me would love to have a fab job, earn more money, etc., but I can't bear to miss the littlies growing, so we manage on what we've got, and when the TC more or less goes later this year, then we tighten our belts again - isn't that why a lot of us haunt these boards? To get the help and support, and friendship when it's all a bit grim? When they are at school, I may be lucky enough to get a school- or uni-based job again so I don't miss too much of them.

I think the country as a whole has become too reliant on benefits, compared to even just 15-20 years ago, without realising it that much. It's a good thing that the system gets a shake-up, as long as those who have real difficulties aren't pushed aside in the drive to cut costs. I know that mortgages etc are proportionately higher than when we married, and that wages are lagging behind inflation of all types, but so many people really aren't getting the idea that we have to change the mindset of the last generation.

Have just read this post & it sounds like a lecture, but I don't mean it to be! Don't shoot me down in flames! I have many friends who work & struggle to make ends meet, other friends manage on 1 wage, doing OS things like me & love it, whilst a few live off the system & moan they don't have enough - the latter group I try to not talk money with or I get cross! There's no 'right' answer, but I think you MUST take responsibility for your own situation - especially if it changes, then you have to change as well.

Maybe those of us with OS skills should do a Jamie Oliver-type thing to pass along all the things we've learned - anyone up for it? :rotfl:

A xo

Orville

kimmy112 wrote: »

im not asking to pay for my medical treatment my husband pays £300 a month in tax! im pretty sure he's the one paying for it.

its quite funny really... people managed fine before tax credit etc where even around. they did what they needed to so they could look after there families. i guess people these days are just too lazy.

So you are relying on hubby?. I guess you don't work then?.

diolch

starchild1972 wrote: »

Due to the position of having 4 children I have been forced to be a SAHM and get benefits....

Before anyone jumps in.....

My husband and I are disabled, me first and the DH was disabled via a illness that took his ability to walk away.
I am a SAHM, I am a SAHM who WORKS FROM HOME and is SELF-EMPLOYED.

I cannot go out to work as I am not only a self-employed SAHM but I am also main carer for my DH.
I don't take benefits for granted.
We save the unused portion of DLA each month JUST IN CASE because who knows what will happen with all the changes going on?
We SAVE as much as we can because I DON'T WANT to be in the position of claiming income support etc if the business goes T*ts up.

I WOULD LOVE to be fit enough to go OUT to work as would DH.

You could manage to be a SAHM but write down ALL those little luxuries e.g.
Holidays
Chocolate bars
New clothes
4th or 5th pair of shoes
Days out
Bottle of wine/crate of beer
Sky
Mobiles
Internet
Car/s
Christmas/B'day pressies
Cinema trips
Takeaways
nights out

and then realise they would have to go for they ARE luxuries.


When I was growing up a treat was a bag of crisps once a month (they were 9.5p and I had to use my pocket money) and clothes came from a jumble sale yet my father was working full time (actually 5.5 days a week) and had a extra weekend job. I'm not 40 yet!

If you can afford to pay teh bills, keep a roof over your head, put food on the table, shoes on your feet and clothes on your back then you don't need anything else in life.

I think you will find that what you and others class as luxuries are now accepted as being normal reasonable day to day expenses.
Have a look at the following list that the government have agreed to as being acceptable and certainly NOT a luxury!

What kind of expenditure is classed as being ‘reasonable day-to-day living expenses’?

Normal monthly expenses, would include rent or mortgage payments (which are reasonable for the area you live in and the size of your family), food, heating and lighting, etc. Below are some examples of things that can also be treated as reasonable expenses:

• TV licence, TV and video hire
  Household insurance
  
  Car tax and insurance

  AA/RAC or similar membership (if you still have your car)

  
  
  Membership of a professional body, needed for your job (unless your employer pays for this)
  
  Prescriptions/dental treatment/opticians
  
  Payment under a maintenance order or Child Support Agency assessment
  
  Mobile phone (a reasonable monthly cost)
• Dry cleaning

Other expenditure items that could be considered:

• Clothing
  Holidays
  
  Hairdressers
  
  Extra curricular activities for children
  
  After school clubs
  
  Pets
  
  
• Rent arrears

This is not meant to be a complete list, and other expenses could be considered.

What kind of expenditure would not be classed as ‘reasonable day-to-day living expenses’?

The following are examples of expenses which are likely to be disallowed (unless there are special circumstances):

• Gym membership, any sports expenses or club membership

  Additional pension contributions to enhance a pension
  
  Private healthcare insurance
  
  Money for gambling, alcohol or cigarettes
  
  Satellite TV
  
  Excessive mortgage payments
• Regular payments to charitable and religious organizations/tithing

Again, the list is not meant to be complete.

no-oneknowsme

Orville wrote: »

Shouldn't the question be.....

What's the word for a sad old woman who comes on here with her unconstructive one liners every day..?

Jog on.....

Im shocked at this ^^^^I thought you and Dmg24 were "tight"?

(even if I do agree with what you said :rotfl:)

Orville

skcollobcat10 wrote: »

You don't have any until you can AFFORD to have them. My daughter and her partner both work FULL TIME, they cannot afford to have children yet, they are not irresponsible enough to.

Until she forgets to take the pill one day or the condom splits. Then what.? Oh yeah because she is responsibile she'd have an abortion wouldn't she?.

Get a grip.

Orville

Fridge2 wrote: »

That's a shame that you are so unconcerned about your poor facility with your native language, but that's up to you I suppose.

I have no beef with her personally as she is merely taking advantage of a very lax system, but you have to admit that something is seriously rotten if it doesn't pay to work whatever the reason.

And for your information, I don't have a problem with a mother and baby being together in the early years, but it is not fair that I am expected to help fund it...having children is a solemn responsibility and you shouls ensure you are adequately prepared to do so..it is true that unforseen events occur, but actually planning family life around benefits is plain wrong.

You are not expected to fund it, nor do you. Can you prove that the actual tax you pay would be going to her actual benefit?. No you can't. You pay tax and that tax could be distrubited in any way.

Orville

no-oneknowsme wrote: »

Im shocked at this ^^^^I thought you and Dmg24 were "tight"?

(even if I do agree with what you said :rotfl:)

You are joking right..?.

We are old sparring partners. I agree with alot of the points people make on here, i do however disagree with the way people choose to relay those feelings, mostly by coming out with crass one liners in a condescending and belittling way, that shows a real lack of maturity and stupidity.

If someone asks a question such as the op's, all that is needed is a simple reply such as, "no at the moment there are no benefits or help to people who choose to give up work".

Not the "oh don't breed if you can't afford it" answer. That type of answer to me shows a major retardation that only serves to give this site a bad name.

KxMx

Sweetie_Jo wrote: »

You can not think about these kinds of situations before you have a child!

Peoples circumstances change daily. When I returned to work, I was under the impression that my childs grandparents would look after her but due to a change in circumstances they can no longer do this. Hence why I didn't think/ budget for childcare!

So you only planned for the black and white? And did no planning for the what if scenarios, or thought about it at all? Like what if elderly parents found childcare too much? Is not much of a stretch is it.

You have several months after all to think about these things when you find out you are expecting.

As others have suggested, go through all your expenses and see what you can cut back on and get rid of. We're all having to do it whatever our circumstances.