Daughter keeps running away

RainbowChild_2

still no news from my DD, her friends or the police

RainbowChild_2

Just rang the police again on the off chance there was any news....NOTHING NADA ZILCH..they had even closed the log and report from yesterday..anyway they have given me a new log number. while I was typing this they have just rang me seconds ago to say they are still actively looking for her but haven't been able to locate her........To be fair I think they only closed the log so they can take it to a different level.....

Morglin

RainbowChild wrote: »

I am posting here to see if anyone has any advice.

Recently my 14yo DD became involved with "the wrong crowd" and has become very abusive and uncontrollable at home and at school.

She was permanently excluded from school and is now attending an inclusion unit awaiting a transfer to another school.

Last night she told me she was staying at a friends round the corner and was brought home by the police at midnight as her and 2 friends were found hiding in the kitchen of an elderly man who in the police officers words was "off his face". She will not elaborate on who this man is.

She absconded again at 1am this morning and I reported her missing straight away. SHe came home at 10.30 this morning and was rude to the officer.

I locked the front and back doors so she couldn't get out. Unfortunately/stupidly I fell asleep at 2pm this afternoon as I have been awake for over 24 hours. OH came home half an hour ago and the kitchen window is wide open, she has gone again and broken the casing and fixings of the window in the process.

I am once again at my wits end and don't know how long I should leave it before telling the police that she has gone again.......do I need to leave it until later this evening?

Not much I can add to the advice, but all I can say is that my daughter went through all this at 14. She drove us demented with her behaviour!:eek:

She did grow out of it, (at about age 16) became a responsible, lovely adult, and is now married, in her late 30's, and her eldest is now a hormone crazy teenager, so she knows exactly how awful they generally are.;)

Just hang on in there - and do what YOU think is right on each occasion.

Best wishes.

Lin

mum2twinsx2

Cant offer you much advice, but remember my mum went through the same with my elder brother. He just disappear for days was horrid to see her so worried:(.

Has she returned yet? x

RainbowChild_2

mum2twinsx2 wrote: »

Cant offer you much advice, but remember my mum went through the same with my elder brother. He just disappear for days was horrid to see her so worried:(.

Has she returned yet? x

Thanks mum no she hasn't I have been on the phone all morning

Apricot

:grouphug: I don't have any advice but just wanted to give you a hug!

mum2twinsx2

RainbowChild wrote: »

Thanks mum no she hasn't I have been on the phone all morning

Oh goodness thinking of you. What a worry, i wonder if thepolice have checked the place she was in the other day, the elderly mans place?

MrsTinks

Just in case anyone ever worries about calling the police... they would rather "waste" hours or days looking because someone called them who were genuinely concerned than have to knock on your door with the worst news because no-one was out looking for her... I know a lot of officers and it is the one thing they all hate having to do... it gives them nightmares

OP do you know about any places she might be? Local shopping centre? Friends? Youth club? Can you and your OH drive round to look for her?

Longer term... is there a relative that both she and you trust that she could live with for a while? A friend of mine has her nephew living with her because he refused to stay with his mum and stepdad - they didn't get on and his way of dealing with it was to run away... repeatedly. Instead he's now settled with his aunt and her family, his uncle takes no crap from him but they deal with him as a person and not their child if that makes sense? They can deal with his behaviour in a more objective manner than his parents could... I don't know if he'll ever move back home, but it's improved his relationship with his mum immensely and they actually enjoy spending time again instead of ending up screaming and shouting and him throwing stuff out of fustration because he felt that he had no control of his life at all and he thought no-one loved him (wrongly obviously but hormones can make you think things are worse than they are....)

rev229

Social sevices have an emergecy team that can be contacted out of hours, we had to use them over new year. it all very distressing.

RainbowChild_2

The police have just called and have now located the addresses of some "friends" and will be calling round there shortly. I asked about the trackand trace on the mobile but they said they would only consider it in another few hours.

Mrstine - unfortunately she has burned her bridges with other family members through verbal abuse so I don't think this will be an option.

Mum- I keep repeating to them about my concerns over this elderly mans place and they just seem to brush it off - maybe they have already been

Thanks for all your kind words of support everyone ..I feel like I have aged 90 years in the last 2 days! My eyes are like the proverbial snow holes and so dark