Daughter keeps running away

MadameCholet

I'm currently having the same problems with my 16yr old DD - infact if I didn't know better I would think I had started this thread myself.

She is a nightmare, she'll go out & not come home, come home go to bed but be gone when I get up in the morning, was missing most of Christmas & New Year & I have lost count of the number of hours I have spent driving the streets & knocking on doors looking for her.

She is violent & abusive towards me, infact she told a youth worker today that when people annoy her or things make her angry she chooses to take it out on me.

The police aren't too bad but there's not a lot they can do to prevent her behaving like this and social services are simply not interested. They were notified after a particularly violent incident in which my DD held a knife to my throat when she was drunk out of her mind, they turned up unannounced a couple of weeks after the incident, spoke to us all & closed the file on us! I had asked about foster care and was told 'no way it's not even an option'.

One thing that gives me hope is the number of people that I have spoken to who had a nightmare with their DD's when of a similar age but who have turned out to be wonderful daughters who they are the best of friends with now.

I hope you've found your DD by now & wish you the strength to get through this awful time as it sure ain't easy.

Savvy_Sue

Another thread reminded me of Parentline, I am assuming they are the charity which used to be called Parentline, but they now seem to be called Family Lives! Don't know what hours their helpline is open, but they may be worth a call.

Flummaxed

RainbowChild, I read your dilemma with your 14 yr old and just wanted to send you a great big hug. I really hope she turns up safely soon. I'm having probs with my 16 year old DD, but nothing like the kind of thing you are going through so I really really feel for you. I don't have any ideas as to how you can get her to see sense and calm down, but there are some amazing people on here who are so generous with their support that I hope you can at least get some comfort from this forum.

In the meantime, I can only send you a big hug and let you know that I, and I'm sure many other good people on here, wish you all the very best in your difficult situation. I hope your daughter comes home soon, and realises that her mother loves her very much and that things take a turn for the better for your family.

Lots of love x

RainbowChild_2

Well the good news is that the police have now picked my Daughter up. However, she is refusing to come home so they are ringing social services...wil let you know what happens

pigpen

At least she is safe and well..

Hope you can get some rest now knowing she is in someones care and won't come to any harm.

gizmo111

RainbowChild wrote: »

Well the good news is that the police have now picked my Daughter up. However, she is refusing to come home so they are ringing social services...wil let you know what happens

They will contact you and try to find family or friends where she can stay for a few days by agreement so they can work with you both with a view to returning her home. Last resort will be childrens residential home or very short term foster placement.

mum2twinsx2

RainbowChild wrote: »

Well the good news is that the police have now picked my Daughter up. However, she is refusing to come home so they are ringing social services...wil let you know what happens

How did you get on? x

happy35

I hope everything work outs for you, it is every parents worst nightmare

good luck x

RainbowChild_2

I realise I am resurrecting an old thread but nothing has really changed here.......she's alive, staying with her Dad.....not what I would call safe though he has allowed her to have her face pierced, boyfriend stay over and I have heard she has a tattoo (not by a professional) It got to the point where she was attacking me and she's a small fry then she went to spend summer with him and is refusing to come back....truly devastated

Spirit_2

Poor you.

A colleague had brought up her daughter, the daughter seeing her father alternate weekends.

As her daughter reached her teens she rebelled against her mum finding a new relationship, and moved temporarily to her fathers. She refused to come home.

Several years later daughter is still there, there is now good contact with the mum though and relationships being rebuilt.

Perhaps the 'safe' her dad can offer her is a good as it gets whilst she is in rebellious mode?

You know where she is at least.