Hoping for some support

ERICS_MUM

Hi Tugrin, I'm just checking in to see how you are. Hopefully this long weekend you are spending time in the garden - weeding and digging can be soothing (sounds silly I know but it can help clear your mind).


Linda xx

Butterfly

Hi lovely Tugrin, it's good you are here, a big well done for having your light bulb moment! You remind me of my mum, she brought us up by herself with no support from my father or any family. It was a real struggle for her (and for us kids as a result) and she was depressed and turned in to quite a shopholic to say the least... her debts started when we were kids and spiralled out of control in recent years. However, they're more in control this year but through a change in luck more than anything.... she never had and still hasn't had her light bulb moment and I wish she would! Anyway, I do understand your kids concerns... having a parent in debt is emotionally difficult to deal with and this may be why they're not able to support you in the way you wish. Also somewhere inside, they may want to help you but they probably can't afford to as they have their own financial commitments. Also it sounds like they feel that you're responsible for getting yourself out of your situation as you made the choices that got you there. I know my mum has emotional issues that contribute to her spending....I did try to emotionally support her for many years, well actually for most of my life, but it all got too much last year and started to negatively affect our relationship, so I had to take a step back to protect myself and let her find her own way. Maybe this is what has happened to your kids. Sorry if this sounds unfair but it does seem to be the way...parents always help out kids but often kids aren't able to help out parents in the same unconditional way. Anyway, just wanted to give you some insight from the kids point of view. But saying all that, I do want to commend you on your efforts to sort yourself out.... here's a BIG hug for you! Keep your chin up and I wish you lots of luck and love on your journey x