Hoping for some support

tugrin

Hi Rosie-
Your post touched me as I have been in that place too. Its as if fun has departed isn't it. BUT that is really only because our definition of fun has changed so radically in the past few years. I dont know how old you are but I suspect quite young? If you are then you are (sadly) part of th hard, play hard, and basically spend your 'hard earned cash' hard. I know this sounds political and 'ranty' but I have seen life change so much as a primary teacher and it truly does worry me for the future.
Here is my advice - redefine what is fun. I'm always telling the children that clever people can always subtly change the rules so that life, which is basically unfair, can be easier and nicer for them.g
Where do you live urban or semi rural.
What have you enjoyed doing in the past that cost money? What skills do you already have eg arty/craft/sewing/knitting/enjoy reading or writing. If you let us know I am sure we can sugeest stuff - I could go on for hours and sorry if I sound all teachery and a bit patronising.
Chin up girl and postback soon. Cant answer at length til tonight but WILL if you get back to me.
Yake care x

ERICS_MUM

Hi Rosie,

I had this problem when my salary was halved a few years back. It's funny though, I really had to reassess my way of life and work out what I actually enjoyed and what I just did as a routine because I could.

So, meals out became a birthday or special occasion treat, a take-away was a monthly pay-day treat, I cut out my "gossip" magazines but still buy an occasional craft magazine etc. It took a while to realise that I was enjoying the challenge of striking a balance between a miserable life and a happy one on a reasonable and sustainable budget.

Please don't let it all get you down, you'll be able to work through it I promise.


Linda xx

tugrin

Hi Kate and Chrissie - didnt have enough time to thank you for your reassuring words this morning, but I do really appreciate them. Its a good sign that Im on the road as a recovering 'spendaholic' then - thats excellent because I have only experienced vaguely uncomfortable feeling about spending on such things before but this was definitely a 'Help-I dont want this money to leave my purse for this pathetic cup of coffee' overwhelm. But there is a teroom at the back of out lovely local bookshop that has cakes from heaven on a Saturday and I am happy to pay (considerably less the SBs) for the occasional treat there, so hopefully I haven't actually turned into Scrooge either.
We must all get behind Rosie too cos that is a horrible feeling of having nothing to look forward to.

tugrin

Hello everyone - you all seem to have gone quiet,; I hope everybody is OK and all the Mums out there had a good day.
Yesterday I took DD into local town to try and get reduced fruit and veg at market (too late - timing is ovbiously everything with this particular thrift strategy) Anyway we ended up in supedrug spending £13.99 on sunblock (VERY good deal by one get TWO FREE!)and she is an extremely pale freckly redhead (already has 3 moles biopsied) so I dont resent this BUT I am getting perilously low in the bank account and its 15 days to payday. I am wondering what else to do to cut down. I know I bought the bikes this month but I also didnt put all the money away that I was supposed to for entertainments/clothes/dog which adds up to £43 so it shouldnt have made that much difference - I sometimes feel that the money I use is somehow different to the cash/currency that everyone else uses and that I am just paying more for everything and not realising.
Well anyway I spent the day in the garden and have sown a few more veggie seeds so maybe the budgeting thing will get better in the summer. Also got a free load of horse manure from a friend in the village so thats all good.
Could be that Im suffering from Sunday night glooms due to having to go back to face the !!!!!! of a head tomorrow and maybe thats why Im so panicked about the money.

Byatt

Hi, I understand about the Sunday night glooms...

Have you tried a spending diary?

Haven't had a very good mother's day; my DD didn't really bother, so felt a bit sad about that.

I know what you mean about the money; it's been a difficult few weeks for me what with vet bills and car bills! One step forward, 2 steps back.

Good deal on the sun cream! I'm a pale freckly redhead too, had some horrendous sun burn when I was young but have been lucky so far. no horrible growths or anything. Thank goodness sun cream is getting cheaper now.

I don't have a garden to speak of, but hope to use some planters. I do have a variety of herbs now which are growing well.

crafty*kate

Sunday night is a dangerous time....it's when I used to do my internet shopping. And I am dreading going in to work tomorrow as well, I am about to raise a formal grievance with my chief exec (eeeeek!)

Have you posted an SOA recently Tugrin, or do I need to go back to page 1? I find that I am still spending things which I hadn't really accounted for in my original budget, so it's very hard when you think 'I should have £20 left' - where the hell has it gone?!

Sorry you haven't had a good mother's day Byatt - I hate Hallmark days like these. I have a wonderful mother (and I tell her so regularly!) but I don't have a dad, and this is my first year since I found out that I will never have children of my own ( I had cancer last year), so I have kind of mixed feelings :S

Byatt

crafty*kate wrote: »

Sunday night is a dangerous time....it's when I used to do my internet shopping. And I am dreading going in to work tomorrow as well, I am about to raise a formal grievance with my chief exec (eeeeek!)

Have you posted an SOA recently Tugrin, or do I need to go back to page 1? I find that I am still spending things which I hadn't really accounted for in my original budget, so it's very hard when you think 'I should have £20 left' - where the hell has it gone?!

Sorry you haven't had a good mother's day Byatt - I hate Hallmark days like these. I have a wonderful mother (and I tell her so regularly!) but I don't have a dad, and this is my first year since I found out that I will never have children of my own ( I had cancer last year), so I have kind of mixed feelings :S

Hi Kate, I find evenings a bad time for internet shopping although I haven't done any since February. (My LBM).

I can understand your mixed feelings. I have been there sadly too. My dd is adopted, she also has autism so I shouldn't be upset for her not doing anything for Mother's Day, but somehow I am tonight. I know she loves me and appreciates me, so maybe it's just me feeling low. Maybe I'm missing my mum (she died in 2007).

I hope you are free from cancer now. Good luck tomorrow. Let us know how you are. xxx

tugrin

Morning Kate and Byatt - Im sending ALL my positive feelings to you as I can see you too are miserable and I feel a bit guilty in stirring it all up. Mothers day is no big deal and you should make your own special 'Official' celebration days like the queens birthday - I do it regularly and have a laugh at the randomness of it all. I had a diary one years a long time ago and it had anniversaries at the bottom of the pages, my favourite was ' Last tram through the Blackwall Tunnel' I told everyone about it at the time. Needless to say cant remember when it is now and that doesnt matter. If it wasnt for all the hype by Hallmark and the like we wouldnt care half as much would we.
Oh well its Moanday and I really hope your forma complaint goes smoothly - it must be quite terrifying for you so remember we are behind you Kate!
My day will be conducted through a drug induced haze if I have anything to do with it (massive pain in head again).
See you all later

ERICS_MUM

tugrin wrote: »

.................My day will be conducted through a drug induced haze if I have anything to do with it (massive pain in head again).
See you all later

That's all you need - you've already got a pain in the !!!!! with that "headmaster" of yours!

I used to have reflexology when my depression was at it's worst and the reflexologist suggested massaging your big toe if you have a headache, apparently there is a direct connection between the toe and head ! It's worth a try.:cool:

Hope everyone has an OK day. Since I had my hissy fit with my brother and sister about them leaving me to care for Mum, they've been a bit better. My sis has taken us both out for lunch twice and my brother is coming to do a couple of jobs for me and then taking mum for lunch today. It might not last but I'm enjoying it while I can.

I've got a Royal Wedding Street Party committee meeting tonight. Dreading it due to the bossy neighbour who has appointed herself chairwoman!

Linda xx

remote_control

Hi

I am new here, just read the entire thread which was very interesting. I have about £4000 of credit card debt and am unemployed. My target for getting out of this debt is the end of July and I intend to have a job in the next two weeks.

Car boot sale - I did one of these and went with a car packed to the roof. I went round the house and thought - would I rather have £1 than this item? People bought some really weird stuff so I would definitely recommend it (half used bathroom products, tent poles, old magazines). It got really addictive and although I sold a few things I actually liked I was so excited to get £60 profit. I then did one again two weeks later and got £85 profit.

tugrin have you been on all the survey websites and top cash back? I have been doing all the free things on topcashback over the weekend and have made about £10. Awesome.

Have an awesome money saving week everyone.