Toddler Toilet Training help! (merged)

Savvy_Sue

MrsMondragon wrote:

My little boy who is 38 months is due to start nursery in September, but they have told me they wont take him unless he is out of a nappy. I dont know think he will be ready by then. He just doesnt seem at all interested in potty training. Does any one know what the legal postion regarding children in nappies and nursery is? I heard somewhere that they couldnt discriminate against a child that wore nappies..but im not sure if thats true.

If there is a developmental reason why a child isn't potty trained then I didn't think a nursery could refuse to take a child in nappies, although it might vary between state and private nurseries.

If you have any concerns or want to rule out developmental delay then talk to your HV. It is very difficult, however, because some children potty train early and others don't!

Sometimes it's worth talking to a child - even if they don't seem interested - about the benefits of being potty trained. Especially if they have friends - maybe while changing a nappy "Oh look your friend Joe can just pop off and do a poo really quickly then come back and play with you, that's so much quicker than stopping to have your nappy changed, isn't it?" Keeping it casual can be the key. If he's keen to start nursery but begins to understand that it may be difficult if he's not potty trained, that might help as well, but sometimes they just don't want to do anything different, and then you are STUFFED!

If we get any more fine weather, then letting him run round garden with nothing on rear end may help.

There have been previous threads on potty training so may be worth searching for them, sorry but my brain can't do that right now ...

Quintus

Have had a look at Gina Ford's book "The Contented Little Baby book of Potty Training" I believe it is. Its very good and practical. When your child is ready potty training can occur quite strait-forwardly. But don't pressure the child it'll make things alot more difficult. Hope that helps

PS My son is not potty trained and he manged to pee all over the floor this evening in front of the TV. Oh well, I content myself on knowing I'll just take it out of his college money. He's already about £250.00 down!

scottishchick27

I potty trained my daughter this time last year when she was 2.5. I just took off her nappy and put her in a pair of pants. I made sure for the first week that we weren't going to be far from home incase of accidents. She wet herself a few times but I didn't make a big fuss I just changed her. She would go to the toilet when she needed and we danced and sang and made a fuss of the "big girl" and she gradually stopped wetting herself. She took her nappy off when she went to bed too so I just left her to it and she was dry all night. We were quite lucky really. She has accidents now and again now but it's more laziness than anything else, she can't be bothered to go when she needs to.

Zziggi

MrsMondragon wrote:

My little boy who is 38 months is due to start nursery in September, but they have told me they wont take him unless he is out of a nappy. I dont know think he will be ready by then. He just doesnt seem at all interested in potty training. Does any one know what the legal postion regarding children in nappies and nursery is? I heard somewhere that they couldnt discriminate against a child that wore nappies..but im not sure if thats true.

A similar policy was in place at my local pre-school. During a check-up the health visitor asked if i was enrolling my son at nursery/pre-school and i told her i couldn't because the pre-school refused to take kids in nappies. The health visitor told me that they are simply not allowed to refuse to take children in nappies (irrespective of developmental delay or not). After this conversation i contacted the pre-school who confirmed their policy was to refuse children in nappies. I told them that my health visitor had told me that this is discrimination and that pre-schools/nurseries etc cannot refuse to take kids in nappies. The pre-school worker said she'd ring me back. The pre-school manager rang me back an couple of hours later and said they would happily take my son and she tried to make out that the pre-school worker had 'misunderstood' my original query over them taking kids in nappies when i'd enquired 6 months previous. Personally i think they'd realised that their refusal to accept kids in nappies was discrimination. As it happens my son was the only one in nappies and within 3 weeks of going to pre-school he was wanting pants.

purplepatch

Your story sounds exactly the same as the situation with my daughter a couple of months ago. She kept taking off the nappy, but wouldn't happily sit on the potty or toilet. She would hang on and on and on, little dribbles on the floor, jumping from foot to foot getting more and more desperate. She weed on the carpet twice when she could hold on no longer, and one other time I managed to get her to sit on the potty once the wee had started so we caught most of it! I was just about to give up with it, when she just sat on the potty and weed all of her own accord!!! Couldn't believe it, showered her with praise and we haven't looked back since. She is 2.5 in September and already dry through the night, although I'm not ditching the night-time nappies yet. She started using the toilet a week after the first potty wee, and she hasn't ever used the potty since - I think that was part of the problem that she saw the potty as her toy rather than something to pee in.

Anyway it may be worth persevering a little longer. By taking her nappy off she is definitely showing some kind of readiness I would say.

Poppy9

To the OP I think she sounds ready but is a bit put out by new baby arrival.

I would set up a little reward chart for her. Not just concentrating on toilet training, but other little things too that you know she will score well on. The weekly reward could simply be a trip to the park without new baby.

I have previously posted that I had two great tips when toilet training. One ditch the expensive comfortable nappies in favour of cheap uncomfortable ones without saying anything to influence their choice and secondly to take out at night at the same time as day. I was a bit nervous of this but on first day when I put DD down for afternoon nap she wanted a nappy on. As soon as she dropped off I whipped it off and when she woke drew her attention to the fact she had slept for 2 hours with no nappy and no accidents. Never looked back. I didn't lift at night as some friends did but I did keep a potty in her bedroom (against my better judgement as I think they should stay in the bathroom) as her room is furthest from toilet for a few months but she never used it. On the rare ocassions she needed the loo in the middle of the night she would call me as she toddled off!

Good luck - I'm sure she will be fine.

Jazzieboy

Hi, 2 points..... my daughter hated the potty, after a few fraught days we popped to Grannys, where she promptly went weewee on Grannys toilet. Never used the potty again.
My 1yr old has just realised that she can undo her nappy ! .... Gaffer tape has cured this ! not attractive I know, but works a treat !!.

shirlyn

My son is three now and has been out of nappies in the day for almost a year.
But he keeps wetting the bed at night and no matter what I do it continues.

What should I do next?

Sarahsaver

i dont know but if you find out tell me Im in the same situation with my son, except he's 5 and a half :rolleyes:

Mumstheword

My almost 5yo is in the same boat. Night time bed wetting isn't usually something you can 'train'. The body needs to mature so that the system 'shuts down' through the night. Until the body gets to that stage, you'll really struggle trying to do anything about it. If my son gets to about 6 and a half and still no sign of a change, I will speak to the doctor. If anyone reads this and knows different, please tell me!!