What is the point in my being alive?

savingwannabe

Glad you are posting. Things will get better. Take it one day at a time and continue to get help it is out there and you can move on from this. Remember there are many good people on here who are willing to help, please dont be frightened to use us. That is what MSE is all about. Good luck petal.

craftysarah

I've had a c**p day and when I read this post it made me very emotional, I'm so glad you're ok now Sim, I know from experience that it doesn't always seem that there is light at the end of the tunnel but THERE IS we just can't always see it. The kind people on here have been so helpful to me and after getting today out of the way (yet one more of life's little 'hurdles') I feel so much more positive than I did when I was hiding under the duvet. Well done and stay positive. Speak to your doctor if you keep feeling up then down, you don't have to go into detail but I think they'll have some ways to help you cope with when you don't want to face the world. Good luck. x

puddings_2

I'm routing for you mate
and it looks like there are lots of other folk routing for you too.

The only advice I can offer is to deal with some small things first, dealing with one or two of them will start to give you your mojo back and make today a better day than yesterday.
(by small things i mean something maybe like getting dressed or having a shower or something proper to eat)

You are with friends on this thread so no need to feel lonely, if you want to talk, as somebody else said earlier, then the samaritans are available 24/7 for a chat their number is 0845 203040 or email [EMAIL="jo@samaritans.org"]jo@samaritans.org[/EMAIL] They also have centres open during the daytime so you can call in without an appointment whenever you feel the need...and just in case you were wondering its not a religous organisation so they wont try and convert you to religion!)

Ill come back and see how youre doing tomorrow

Take care
puds

psychopathbabble

Sim, please can you let us know you are ok??

Call the Samaritans as previously suggested. There will be a way out of this. It might not be easy but there is always a solution somewhere.

I can't help much (if at all) but please please PM me if you need to chat or rant.

snookey

Glad to see your back on line.

joeblack066

Good to see you online Sim.. So with you on the Robert Downey Junior thing, and I admire him so much too :-)

I'm a great film fan, and one that really helped me when I was struggling was Evan Almighty- Morgan Freeman (as God) tells Evans wife that when people ask for something ( courage, strength for example), what they get is the opportunity to be courageous, the situation to find strength. This is the answer to their prayer. I like that a lot. You have shown great strength in not having that drink, and great courage in making those calls. I am full of admiration for you.

Hope you've had a good night. Hugs. X

Spiritedwolf

Glad to see you back on the thread Sim xxx It's great you've managed to do things today to begin sorting out your finances, but more importantly you've been out, got food in, rubbish out and you've treated yourself to a good movie. It's those kinds of things that will keep you well, healthy and strong enough to tackle the money side of things.

Keep taking care of yourself. If you find it difficult, then imagine you are taking care of someone else, going through something similar. Treat yourself with the patience and kindness that you'd give another MSE DFW.

Because I often feel down, I have a piece of paper pinned on my wall for dark days with a few lists:

A list of three things to try and do even on days I feel down (for me they happen to be: take medication, brush teeth and take care of my dog) along with a reason why its important. Like I need to brush my teeth because punishing myself with painful (and expensive) dentistry is wrong, I definitely don't deserve it! I certainly wouldn't wish it on anyone else.

I have a list of things which I could do to cheer myself up with a reminder to do one or more if possible. Not expensive things, but just to put on a favourite album or dvd, to have something nice to eat, to use nice shower gel, to watch some comedies, to make myself a cup of herbal tea, to phone my mum or a good friend, to talk to my husband about how I'm feeling, to read a good book, to do one of my hobbies etc. Little things to keep myself sane really.

It's also good to put a list of things to do in a crisis: that'd be your Samaritans number/email address, contact details for the AA (or other support you might be able to get for when you feel that you might have a drink) and anything else that would keep you safe - a reminder of the things you love or things you'd like to do to answer that question of why to keep safe/sober. If you can't think of anything else to put here, put: "The people on the Money Saving Expert forums care about me and value my input." or similar (cause we do!).

Consider making yourself a list, no one else has to see it. It just gives you some stuff to do to help you on those bad days. Of course make it relevant to you - that's the point.

Keep updating us,
Spirited x

miss_lisalou

Simon honey your post made me cry. You have no idea how many people feel this way but are too scared to say so, even to strangers on a forum like this.

I was pleased to see your second post, that you'd got on the phone to start sorting things out. If it all seems like too much, try just focusing on one small problem at a time. You'll be surprised how good it feels after dealing with one issue, then let that be your motivation to move onto the next.

Whenever you feel like this again, just come onto this board and say how things are - there are always other folk who have been in the same boat or those who feel exactly the same way and just to know that you're not alone is a great comfort in itself.

Best of luck. x

Gettingtherequickly

Good to see you are a bit more positive, suspect I am speaking for everyone when I say that I was very relieved to see you had posted.

BTW, you are obviously very moral about your debts, but please don't worry about the student loan one at the moment, that will only enter the equation when you are feeling much better and in a job which you like. So if you take that number out, you have reduced the amount you owe by more than 50%, together with the tv licence payment you made yesterday, the number is reducing! What more can you ask for at the moment, well ok a lottery win would be nice, but you have done this yourself. Be proud.

amersall

"Welcome back" sim, glad you are getting to grips with things, wish you all the luck in the world and hope you get through this. I would like to thank all the posters of this thread for the humanity and support that they have given to sim , i take my hat off to you all xxxxx.