LittleBoots Big Dreams

LittleBoots

little_h wrote: »

Oh you poor thing! Having read my ramblings you will know that I have been there too, although the lies/misleadings were about different things.

At least you know it wasn't you doing anything bad.

May I recommend a good listening to of the Paloma Faith album. Particularly tracks 2 and 4 (4 is Do you want the truth or something beautiful!) which are about lies, lies, lies.

(and I am saying this while trying desperately to listen to my own advice) - at least you know now that he wasn't as great as you thought. It is brutal, and it does taint things as you say. I made the decision that it wouldn't affect my looking for the good in everyone, but it would make me that bit more aware that not everyone was always quite what they said they were, and there is a difference between that awareness and complete bitterness/cynicism. I am not bitter/twisted/cynical despite some people giving me reason to be!

Thank-You, have just read my past few posts and sound like such a drone! But very glad to have this diary to record these things . What you say makes a lot of sense I have spent the past few months blaming myself for the break up but now I can (try to) let go of it as it wasnt all my fault. I think this experience will make me hold back a lot more in relationships and not be so trusting. I always found it hard to trust people anyway so will just have to improve on my character judgement! xxx

little_h_2

I thought that too. But decided it's not necessarily a weak point to be trusting and believe the best in people.

my counselling lady said that there is nothing wrong with just being that bit more aware and really listening to your gut and I agree with this. My first serious BF was so bitter and cynical and untrusting, and I vowed I would never end up like this!

but it is a difficult balance, between not getting taken in by lies/!!!!!!!!, and missing out on wonderful things because you are too afraid of what *might* happen!

(maybe repeating myself now, have had wine!) x

LittleBoots

little_h wrote: »

I thought that too. But decided it's not necessarily a weak point to be trusting and believe the best in people.

my counselling lady said that there is nothing wrong with just being that bit more aware and really listening to your gut and I agree with this. My first serious BF was so bitter and cynical and untrusting, and I vowed I would never end up like this!

but it is a difficult balance, between not getting taken in by lies/!!!!!!!!, and missing out on wonderful things because you are too afraid of what *might* happen!

(maybe repeating myself now, have had wine!) x

Haha no I know what you mean. If Mr Perfect :rotfl:did come along it would be unfair on him to be cynical/mistrusting etc because of something someone else did. Just have to take it slow next time. Hows that for positive thinking?? Predicting a next time!

little_h_2

it's the first time I can think that you have said there may be a next time so I think we can call that progress! :j :rotfl:

my new Mr Possible/Maybe is a self-declared non rusher. Driving me potty! :rotfl: so am breaking the habit of a life time and trying my damnedest to act cool! :eek: can't be bothered with being stressy about it!

burntfingers_2

LB and Little_h

As you know I have found my wonderful OH. It took sometime to actually realise that he was doing something for me and just me without any hidden agenda.

When he turned up with flowers I was so shocked and amazed that someone would want to do that for me, and someone that actually thought I was worth listening to...

He was there to wipe away the tears, offer advice when needed and even by the way that I looked he knew if I was having a bad day, I didn't have to say a thing...

You will both go on and find someone who will love you for what you are...they will treat you with the love and respect that you do deserve...I had said NO MORE!! andI truly, truly meant it and out of the blue OH walks back into my life...I never ever made any conscientious decision to be with him, I just knew with all my being that no matter what had happened before that he was my knight in shining armour...corny I know...:o

I trust first, always have, always will...that is until someone gives me reason not to...I would say trust your gut instinct...its usually right....:)

You will have good and bad days...when my !!!!!! hubby told me that he had met someone else...well it was the tell tale lovebites all over his neck that gave it away...I was soooooooo shocked but knew it was part of the control thing. Once I had picked myself up off the floor, dusted myself off then I thought onwards and upwards. I was told what doesn't break us, makes us stronger !! and that is soooooooo true....:A

Have a good afternoon

Bf xxx

LittleBoots

BF I love your posts, I really do . It's always nice to see your happiness and positiveness
I know that I can't rely on another man to make me happy, just wish I wasn't such a sensitive soul. Need to learn to put my happiness first I guess, how do you do that??

burntfingers_2

I can be an overly sensitive soul....sometimes to my own downfall...but we live and learn and pick ourselves up and have a dust down and then shout next !! not as in a man...I hasten to add I meant about what life throws at us....:)

LittleBoots

Hiya

Sorry not been on much, been working and festering the past week or so.
March ended a bit pants
so bring on Happy Happy April!!!
Yeayyyyyy
Will be back in due course with my aims etc xxx

Shoe_Gal

Happy April :j Hope it's good for you :A

LittleBoots

Hiya

Having a goodish weekend so far but mood still crappy
Went to a comedy show on Fri night then had a date with a guy off pof last night!
Was good but dont think there was any spark there.
Or maybe its just me, still feeling rundown etc.

Sorry for such a negative post, still to think of some aims for April. Luckily have a few events arranged that are already paid for, have to be careful with the pennies this month as I have a few things on next month to fund. Oh I have my sewing class starting this month too .

Money wise things are ok, still have to get my totals but work keep paying we wrong! Grrr
Spent some money yesterday on cat food, me food and got my eyes done. Also got a ticket to the Girls Day Out Show at the SECC next month, £12 which includes 2 drinks, a boots goody bag and £10 of advantage points! Good deal I think!

Almost forgot to say I lost another 2lb!!!
Now into a new stone range I never thought I'd be in!!!
This rundown feeling has its advantages I guess...