Please please please help! Pregnant & suicidal over debts, redundancy & illness

Pott5y

A SOA is a statement of affairs which can be found here http://www.makesenseofcards.com/soacalc.html . This is basically all the financial commitments (ingoing and outgoing) you have.#

Secondly there is a letter you can write to your creditors to stop them harrassing you by phone. They can only contact you by letter then. sorry not sure where to find the letter but I am sure someone else on here can.

I am with Payplan and they can arrange dealing with your debts/creditors on your behalf.

Just try to remember the most important thing you need to think about is you and your unborn child. Get to the doctors and talk to them. They will definately be able to help with support and advice.

The monet problem may seem huge to you but there is lots of support on this forum and people here will help and advise and get you through it.

Good luck

cattyboo

Bless you hun, sounds like you're having a dreadful time.

A SOA is a 'statement of affairs', a list of what money you have coming in and going out, if you go to the debt free wannabe forum homepage there's some more info there, I think the link is to here...

http://www.makesenseofcards.com/soacalc.html

Please don't do anything drastic it's not worth it, I'd recommend going to the CAB, they're amazing with sticky situations like this and can help you to communicate with the creditors to lay off you and work out a manageable repayment plan. I don't know anything specific but there must be laws in place to stop employers hassling you back to work when you're medically signed off (the CAB would be able to tell you that too I'm sure)

My best advice is to try and move forward in small steps, maybe set yourself a target to book an appointment to see a doctor/the CAB for one day and do a statement of affairs the next etc, then you can feel like you're accomplishing something positive instead of being stuck wallowing in the stress of it all. Sounds like you might be a bit stuck for a support network too with your dad being ill and all, this is a good place to come to remind yourself that you're not alone. There's some amazing people on here too with some great ideas and know how (I'm a newbie too so can only offer support and basic advice, I don't profess to know a lot!).

Keep your chin up love, you'll come out the other side of all of this a stronger person

C x

cattyboo

Also, looky here... http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/loans/debt-help-plan xx

suzie_wong

vicxzy wrote: »

Thank you KT at the minute I cant even speak I just cry all the time, I dont think I am brave enough to just call up & cry down the line.
x

Please do call them. Don't worry about crying- they are used to that sort of thing. You need to talk to someone that has time to listen to you and won't judge.
Please also go to the doctors. It is completely understandable that you are depressed- anyone would be in the same situation. Your doctor will be able to prescribe you something that will help you to cope and not make any rash decisions. I have suffered with depression several times over the years, and I know how I used to be unable to think rationally.

It must be awful getting all those phonecalls, and I wonder if it would be possible for you to get a dirt cheap payg phone that only your close friends and family have the number for? You could then turn off your other phone and let the companies waste their time calling you as much as they like! I got my dad a really basic phone from Carphone Warehouse for £4.95!!!

If you are able to do the above you will be in a better position mentally to get advice on how to deal with yor debts.

In the meantime, thinking of you and sending you hugs xxx

*KT*

vicxzy wrote: »

Thank you KT at the minute I cant even speak I just cry all the time, I dont think I am brave enough to just call up & cry down the line.
x

You can also email them at [EMAIL="jo@samaritans.org"]jo@samaritans.org[/EMAIL] if you feel it would help.

As an ex-volunteer I can tell you, we're used to people crying down the phone, for moments or even sometimes an hour or more at a time, without being able to say much of anything. It's a brave step. I know because I was a caller before I was a volunteer. I'd still be a volunteer now if my circumstances would allow it.

bravobeastie

Can anyone point me in the direction of the template letter to send creditors to stop phone calls please?

Pott5y

Found this regarding the telephone calls.


Dear Sirs,

I am writing with reference to my account number ******** and the constant phone calls I am recieving from your company.

Please can you put all further correspondance to me in writing.

If you continue to harass me by telephone, you will also be in breach of the Communications Act (2003) s.127 and I will report you to OFCOM, Trading Standards and The Office of Fair Trading, meaning that you will be liable to a substantial fine.

Be advised that any further telephone calls from your company may be recorded and used in evidence and I expect this harassment to cease immediately.

vicxzy

Thank you all so much I am going to look at the links now, I had just had a cuddle from my dog & managed to pull myself together for a few minutes & now after all your lovely replies I'm sobbing like a baby again!
Im so woprried about the baby too as Ive been so ill, I have to wait til the 31st for another scan to check all is ok
The baby & my dog are all that is keeping me going right now x

vicxzy

Pott5y wrote: »

Found this regarding the telephone calls.


Dear Sirs,

I am writing with reference to my account number ******** and the constant phone calls I am recieving from your company.

Please can you put all further correspondance to me in writing.

If you continue to harass me by telephone, you will also be in breach of the Communications Act (2003) s.127 and I will report you to OFCOM, Trading Standards and The Office of Fair Trading, meaning that you will be liable to a substantial fine.

Be advised that any further telephone calls from your company may be recorded and used in evidence and I expect this harassment to cease immediately.

Thank you can I still use this letter if I do not answer the calls?x

dancingfairy

Hi Viczxy - no wonder you are struggling to cope - it sounds like you have a lot of things going on all at the same time - but they are all solveable one step at a time.
The most important thing here is you and your unborn child - the creditors , your boss-everyone else can wait. The creditors can be overgrown bullies - don't let them win. At the end of the day they can't have what you haven't got - no matter what threats they dream up, however much they shout and scream and sending nasty letters - 99.99% of it is hot air.
I really would phone or email the Samaritans and get some help with that - even if you just cry on the phone to them. When you are feeling a teeny bit stronger I would recommend a cup of tea and a biscuit and come back here as there are always loads of friendly people about to help - and believe me they will - one step at a time.
df