Mooloo's New Home, New Year and New Start part 3

Savvy_sewing

lingojingo wrote: »

Oooh, we love Millets Farm (it's quite near my Mum, sister and brother, it's only me that lives so far away). You should take DGD there when the maize maze has grown, you'll have a great time in there , and when you find the middle they give out ice lollies.

After all my walking today, I am not sure I would make it around the Maize maze. But perhaps we will have to try.
I loved looking at all the stuff in the store, that are nothing to do with gardening. Like the Yankee Candles and the Cath Kidston stuff etc etc etc Heaven and I didnt spend a single penny!

Savvy_sewing

Morning.! Eek its still quite early. DGD woke me up as I heard her going down the stairs. (Must get the gate put back up at the top!). She started to cry thinking I had gone out. But I was still inbed. That was about half an hour ago.
I am having a cup of tea, and she has her warm milk that she still insists on having. So we are experimenting with the childrens channels that I subscribed to at the end of last week. (Becoming brain dead by some of the same stuff on CBBies or tiny pops!).
Its Nursery today. Then I am aiming to get some sewing done up in my room. There is a lot of housework jobs that need doing, but they will have to wait until after I have finished the bag I started at the weekend, and cut out at least one more, and made a good impression of sewing it.!
I have to check up on a few people who were interested in walking stick bags and see if they are definate orders too.

Savvy_sewing

Twin 2 has called me, a few times, bless her. The court case about the boys is today. She has asked for me to be able to see the boys, have contact with her when ever she does, until the tiime we are not allowed contact anymore. The summing up is this afternoon. I feel guilty that I am not with her, as we were expecting it to last 3 days and was planning to be with her on Thursday.
Alas its looking like its a case of just crossing the t's and dotting the i's.
I have been out to Banbury instead of sewing as I had to take my mobile phone back to CarphoneWarehouse. The woman was not surprised at the problem I was having and I have a loan phone until mine is back. Expect it to be 2 weeks!
I also went a little bit spending mad! Had a fitting for a bra as I have decided that guessing was not good enough, and Mr Primarni £4 bras may not be the best for me. (this meant that I actually bought two decent ones, that actually are the right size. but was a little extravagant with a set I really liked, and hope I will not regret in the light of the day!).
Then I went to my favourite charity shop! Oops I bought some storage boxes, for my bits and pieces, and some curtain fabrics at £1 a metre. So I was a little hooked. It was a good job that they only accepted cash and I only had £20 on me, or I may have been even further overloaded!
I feel so guilty that I have spent so much on me. On the weekend I gave the twins £20 each and £30 to DS. Then on Sunday twin1 rang asking for another £50 and I refused.
Her benefits have been stopped, and she has been told that she has to change her claim to Incapacity benefit. (except its EMA isnt it) so she has no money again. I have told her to bring her accounts with her today when she comes over. I think that I will have to do some redcross parcels again! Not happy as they wont give her a crisis loan. It also messes up her Housing Benefit and she has to reclaim it. Then of course she has to go back onto Jobseekers and it will all be messed about again! Really not in her favour these days, which means good old Mum needs to fill in. But its not what I wanted to do anymore. I was hoping to back off again, as help had started to creep back up.
I know that I have gone way off of budget for April and start of May now.
Oh well what is to be, is to be.

Savvy_sewing

Well Social Services got the result they were after and twin2 has lost the battle for the boys. She is gutted, as there were a few things that becuase of the father of DGS2, she, and the father of DGS1, have had reduced letterbox contact as they think that it would affect DGS2 if his brother had more contact then he did.!
Great.
She was in a mess and I ended up driving over to the courts to collect her.
I have told DS to look after her, today. Becuase she wanted to go home and not stop over with us.
Twin1 has lost her benefit and having to reclaim and due to not being able to get intouch with the people that run her housing she is not able to claim for a Crisis Loan. So she is sitting here sulking.
I told her I dont know why, as she knows that she will not go hungry and that she will have her basic needs met by me, as she usually does so the only difference is she is broke earlier then she usually is!
I am rather deflaited to be honest. Even though we knew the outcome, its becuase I cannot really say the right words to twin2. Who could?
They have already cut her contact down, she has lost her Tuesdays already.
This is what is tearing her apart. She will get the next 4 Thursdays, with me, and then it is cut to fortnightly, then once a month. So within 3-4 months she will not be able to see them again until they are adults.
What can a mother tell her child about it.? As a mother loosing your child is the worst thing in the world. Just having an eptopic pregnancy nearly destroyed me. My sister had a cot death and never really got over it dispite having 3 more children.
I suppose we will get the advice and help that Gizmo has told us is there, and thank goodness that she warned us as we went along so its not such a shock.
But its still hard to think that its going to be over so soon now.
On my case we are still awaiting the SS to get thier act together as somewhere along the line they have not put into action what they were shouting at me to get done.! So we are no further down the line on our applications for SG and I still havent had the funding we were supposed to have. So nothing new there.
I have succumbed to a very early glass of white wine, and a heatpad on my back. I bought a ready cooked chicken and some salad for tea so all we have to do it put it on the plate and serve it. Twin1 is here so she can do that when they are ready.

jackieglasgow

Words are very inadequate at this time Mooloo, but I am thinking often about you and your daughter and the boys. I hope that whatever becomes of them, their new life is happy, and that they know as they grow up, that their birth family loved and fought for them. xxx

icelandic_queen

Mooloo I'm so sorry for you all. As jackie has said words are inadequate at this time. Just to let you know that I'm thinking of you and pray that you all get strength to get through this devastating time XX

lingojingo

Big hugs from me, for all of you (((((((((())))))))))
Words are inadequate, just want you to know I'm thinking of you x

peppa-pig

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx to u all

thorsoak

I'm so sorry that the time has finally come Mooloo. As Gizmo warned us all, it didn't look as if there could be a happy ending for you, Twin2 and her little family - but they will know, when they grow up, that they were loved by their birth family, and that it was only circumstances that parted them from those who have loved them since birth.

'Twas always thus - I have a friend (L) who is just a bit younger than me (in her 60's) who has only just discovered that her mother was in fact someone that she had known slightly as a child - a cousin - who gave birth to her after short relationship with an American soldier just before D-day. L's birth mother who is now nearly 80, has only just spoken to her and told her - and she has no idea as to where her father might be - he could have died after D-day, he never made contact with the mother again. And of course, during the war/just after, it was relatively commonplace to have that sort of family adoption.

But L's birth mother has told her that she was always loved - birth mother never married, never had any other children - but thought it best to leave L within the family that she thought was hers - and had to lover her at a distance. Such heartbreak.

Your DGSs will at least know when they grow up that they do have another family and that they were loved. L will never know if her father survived the war, whether she has siblings in the USA or not. But she is enthralled to find that her mother is still alive.

thorsoak

Another thought occurs to me, Mooloo - do you think that all this upset with Twin 2 will actually seep into Twin 1's brain, and get her getting her act together a bit more? Will she realise that she has to become more responsible - not necessarily for DGD, but for herself? I'd like to think it might.

{{hugs}}