4 Weeks pregnant can I survive

onlyroz

abby1234519 wrote: »

Then I would recieve child tax credit.

I thought you were only entitled to tax credits if you were employed (as opposed to being a student who doesn't, after all, pay tax).

jellyhead

abby1234519 wrote: »

I find it really odd that as a student you seem to be better off having a child at university than if you were working. I don't see how thats fair but as its happening to me who am I to complain. I just wish my friend Heidi had been given the same support when she was out of uni than I hope to be given

As you said, you'd get pretty much the same amount of money just for being a single mum on the dole. Don't let anyone make you feel guilty, this was an unexpected change to your plans but you're still going to have a career and pay into society.

jellyhead

onlyroz wrote: »

I thought you were only entitled to tax credits if you were employed (as opposed to being a student who doesn't, after all, pay tax).

There are different types of tax credit. Parents get child tax credits as part of benefits for being unemployed, low paid or whatever.

LittleMissInDebt

Plans_all_plans wrote: »

Well my heart totally goes out to you! I know exactly what you're going through, only I was in the middle of my finals when I found out I was pregnant. I was 20...

I booked 2 appointments at the clinic but went through with neither as I knew in my heart of hearts I'd regret it forever and I also felt that I'd never forgive myself.

Same thing happened to me, only I did have an abortion. That was thirteen years ago and despite having three lovely children since, I still regret the missing one. Glad you were braver than me, I was just terrified!

Pee

Take your time and think about all of your options.

If you choose to have the baby, you will manage.

If you chose to have an abortion, that might be the right decision for you. Only you can decide that.

Counselling would be great to let you express yourself and come to some conclusions. CAB and the benfit checker on here can help you with what is available financially. Also the Uni.

Studying with a baby is not impossible but you may take some time out. Creche facilities can be great, to.

Best of luck whatever you decide.

jjww_2

Hi abby,

Whatever you ultimately decide is your choice. Remember whatever you choose to do to get advice on how to cope with the effects of either being pregnant or having a termination may have on your bi polar. Hormones during pregnancy have a massive effect on mental health, as a sufferer of depression who had first child at 16 and second (who sadly died) at only 18 pregnancy can be very draining and mentally exhausting however In my opinion having a child can stabilise you mentally as you have someone else to focus on (not sure if this would work the same for bi-polar).

I also don't mean to preach but in one of your previous posts you mention smoking drugs occassionally this is one of the most damaging things you can do to your own mental health. The worst period of depression I have ever suffered from was when i too occassionally smoked drugs (approx 14 years ago before son was born). Also alchohol is a depressant and will not help I am tee total and still go out to pubs and socialise but i have more fun because I can remember what everyone else has forgotton the next morning lol.

I wish you all the best and regardless of what anyone says everyone circumstances are different and only you can decide what is the best for you at this point of your life whatever you decide have faith in your own decision making.

brians_daughter

abby1234519 wrote: »

Been to the clinic and they've refered me to BPAS for some counselling and advice etc.

Abby i see in your post you said you have been ref'd to BPAS... please please google these before you go.

BPAS WILL TALK YOU THROUGH THE METHODS OF TERMINATION...NOT COUNCEL YOU AS IN HELP YOU DECIDE WHAT YOU WISH TO DO

I would never judge anyone on their decisions EVER but PLEASE just google them so you know what to expect...

If anyone else here knows to the contry please correct me, but i wouldnt want any woman to expect councelling and then turn up to find what i found....I thought i was going to here about help available etc, and came out with 4 lots of info on different termination proceedures and different clincs i could attend even though i made it clear i was swaying towards keeping the baby..

brians_daughter

abby1234519 wrote: »

I find it really odd that as a student you seem to be better off having a child at university than if you were working.

Although this is somewhat off topic from the op's original post what you must factor in is Abby will be paying her £4950 pa loan back at a later date... almost 1/3 of her 'income'

onlyroz wrote: »

I thought you were only entitled to tax credits if you were employed (as opposed to being a student who doesn't, after all, pay tax).

lol, are you having a laugh? Students do not pay tax??? I wish... I have been paid today from my employer and i can assure you i pay tax.... the only time a student does not pay tax on earnings is if they earn under their personal allowance or if they work non term time in the summer... If they worked non term time and then so much as a week in term time the whole amount in that tax year is subjected to tax at normal rates.

abby1234519

jjww wrote: »

Hi abby,

Whatever you ultimately decide is your choice. Remember whatever you choose to do to get advice on how to cope with the effects of either being pregnant or having a termination may have on your bi polar. Hormones during pregnancy have a massive effect on mental health, as a sufferer of depression who had first child at 16 and second (who sadly died) at only 18 pregnancy can be very draining and mentally exhausting however In my opinion having a child can stabilise you mentally as you have someone else to focus on (not sure if this would work the same for bi-polar).

I also don't mean to preach but in one of your previous posts you mention smoking drugs occassionally this is one of the most damaging things you can do to your own mental health. The worst period of depression I have ever suffered from was when i too occassionally smoked drugs (approx 14 years ago before son was born). Also alchohol is a depressant and will not help I am tee total and still go out to pubs and socialise but i have more fun because I can remember what everyone else has forgotton the next morning lol.

I wish you all the best and regardless of what anyone says everyone circumstances are different and only you can decide what is the best for you at this point of your life whatever you decide have faith in your own decision making.

I haven't smoked drugs in a month or so, I guess earlier what I meant was I had cut out even the idea. As for drinking, well I've not been a big drinker for a while now, that died down earlier this year. Pretty confident I don't need either, I haven't done for a while. And I could never do something harmful. I even went out and bought fruit and veg today, bearing in mind I generally live a staunce carbed up diet

abby1234519

brians_daughter wrote: »

Abby i see in your post you said you have been ref'd to BPAS... please please google these before you go.

BPAS WILL TALK YOU THROUGH THE METHODS OF TERMINATION...NOT COUNCEL YOU AS IN HELP YOU DECIDE WHAT YOU WISH TO DO

I would never judge anyone on their decisions EVER but PLEASE just google them so you know what to expect...

If anyone else here knows to the contry please correct me, but i wouldnt want any woman to expect councelling and then turn up to find what i found....I thought i was going to here about help available etc, and came out with 4 lots of info on different termination proceedures and different clincs i could attend even though i made it clear i was swaying towards keeping the baby..

I had been looking on their website actually and thinking hmmmm, I see nothing about keeping children! I need to speak to someone else methinks