MSE Pregnancy Club 20

Chakani

nic2075 wrote: »

Thanks for the kind words ladies. i do feel quite cut off as I have only one really close friend but she has enough on her plate with 3 kids under 3 (yep ) and is in the middle of renovating her old barn house.

I dont think I can ever fully explain whats going on but ill have a go as I really feel the need to talk to someone and you ladies are always understanding and full of good advice. It will probably be quite long and rambling so ill warn you in advance......


Thanks for just being there.:o

:grouphug: Nic, it sounds like you are having a truly difficult time. Is DH having any MH help currently?

It sounds to me like there are two problems that need addressing - firstly his own problems - if he is regularly taking time off sick then he really needs to get to the GP to try and find a better way to manage it, or if he is already seeing the GP, then he needs to ask for more help. Will he go?

The problems between the two of you sound just as difficult to tackle as well, and totally understandable.

How do you feel in yourself? It must be a terribly difficult thing to deal with, especially in a new place. You really need to be looking after yourself too :grouphug:

dustystar02

my1stbaby wrote: »

hi everyone, hope you are all doing well, just a question i would like to ask - i am due 20th march and I have taken 3 weeks off work before this as holiday but getting to the stage of wondering if I should add on another 2 weeks before this so it will be 5 weeks before I am due, I am just wondering what everyone else has done in the past, would I feel 5 weeks drag or will I be grateful for the time off beforehand, I am really interested to hear what everyone has done. I don't feel ill or anything but starting to feel I can't be bothered with work! would really appreciate any replies, thanks.

I'm exactly the same - I'm finishing just 2 weeks before my EDD cos I've been told any longer and time will drag. However I really cannot be mithered with work now, I plan to go down to 4 days a week in feb.
I do think 5 weeks may be a bit much but if you have plenty to occupy you then why not?
I also think this bubs may be early so I'm now regretting not taking the extra week

Teenie_D

GRR just posted a reply to Nic and I have lost it :mad:

Nic sweetheart, I really don't know what to say to you hun. When you were moving I just thought it was the fear of the unknown but there is obviously more to it.

It looks like you are making all the sacrifices and you seem to be almost walking on egg shells, and that's not fair on you.:( Can your OH not see the pattern? Has he looked at going to the doc or maybe going to counselling (either as a couple or on his own). These are probably things you have already looked at or suggested, just don't know what else i can suggest.

I wish I was there to give you a proper hug. The offer still stands, I'm not that far away from you so if you need someone don't hesitate. I will pm you my moby but I don't want you to feel obliged iykwim:o

You can't go on like this though, it's not good for anyone

dustystar02

Oooh Nic, i honestly don't know what to say to try and offer support.

He definitely needs to get his depression seen to though. You also need to realise that for now the most important people are yourself and your children. You have now moved and so need to make the best of what is there, has your OH enrolled at a new GP? has he explained about his depression, I honestly think if he just helped himself a little then things wold seem so much better.

Re the trust, I cannot advise but this will needs addressing AFTER he has got himself sorted. His depression shouldn't be blamed for his actions but he won't be in a place ready to deal with your feelings until he has dealt with his own.

I hope this has made sense, the main thing is he needs to get help and you need to ficus on yourself and your kiddies...:)

LabLover

Nic , cant begin to imagine how you must be feeling. :grouphug: Dodgy hug. But if you ever need to vent , just come on here and we will all listen. It must be difficult with your OH , you want to scream that he needs to work to look after you all but doing that will only make it worse.Can only suggest what everyone else has that he goes to see GP or go for some counselling.

LabLover

Going to do a bump/flab pic tonight ,Im 16 weeks today !!! Will take it on my bberry , how do I get it on here ? Also is anyone else having trouble parking their car? Its like one side of my brain has been wired wrong , Im always forgetting words and cant seem to park my car for love nor money. We have a private space that came with my flat and its big enough to fit a bus in , will be handy when bubs comes but at the minute it takes me 5 attemps to get in , lol

Teenie_D

my1stbaby wrote: »

thanks for that reply, i can't seem to make up my mind, i will be going back to work at 6 months and I know I still have 2 weeks holiday left to take, maybe it's because I see so much doing around the house as well I feel it will give me the time to get more done.

Remember you will also accumulate hols while on maternity leave I am planning on taking a week before I go back to work.;)

Sorry BBM missed your post, looking forward to hearing how it goes. Good luck!

galvanizersbaby

LabLover wrote: »

Going to do a bump/flab pic tonight ,Im 16 weeks today !!! Will take it on my bberry , how do I get it on here ? Also is anyone else having trouble parking their car? Its like one side of my brain has been wired wrong , Im always forgetting words and cant seem to park my car for love nor money. We have a private space that came with my flat and its big enough to fit a bus in , will be handy when bubs comes but at the minute it takes me 5 attemps to get in , lol

I'm not sure - I've failed to post any of my pics so would be good if someone could produce an idiots guide for me

Re the parking - not sure I can comment as I'm crap at parking at the best of times :rotfl: - I am forgetting everything though at the moment though (more so than usual) - from memory this didn't get much better for me after the birth :rotfl:

Teenie_D

It took me ages to upload photos from my Blackberry yesterday but it turns out I can't get a private e mail on it and that's one way of doing it. I eventually dowloaded Blackeberry Desktop Software and sent it to my lappy using the USB. Once I knew what I was doing it was easy enough LOL!

If you are using a digi camera dowload your photos as normal to your computer and go to tinypic.com resize by going to the drop down box and selecting website/email and upload. Then I think you copy the URL for forums and paste it on a new post here I would know if if I see it but can't remember
Others use photo bucket but haven't used it so not sure what to do.

FairyShazza

Congratulations MV :j so glad to hear that all is well and you and Joshua (lovely name btw) are at home having those long awaited cuddles

Wow Dusty LOVE the bathroom I have to say I am rather jealous ours is so outdated and could do with ripping out and replacing but we aren’t planning on staying there long term so doesn’t seem much point.

Lablover I know how you feel about being sad you don’t have room for a designated nursery. OH and I were hoping to move before the baby comes. Unfortunately we heard back from our advisor to say that if we move mortgages at this point in time (which we’d need to do as our current one isn’t available anymore so can’t be extended) we would incur an £8k penalty

She has suggested we stay put until at least June as then the penalty drops slightly and we can reassess but I think we are going to be at our house for at least another year which means no third bedroom for baby to have as his/her nursery I’m quite sad as I’d envisaged we’d be moved and in a bigger house before the baby came but it hasn’t worked out that way.

Congratulations on reaching viability Fantafan Which pram did you go for again?

Good luck with the scan babyboysmummy hope it all goes well – come back with a picture for us pleeeeeease

Myfirstbaby you are due the same day as me. I am starting my maternity leave on 12th February but I am also taking a weeks holiday before that as if I don’t I will lose it. This means my last working day will be Friday 4th February the day before I turn 34 weeks.

I am planning on getting the house straight from top to bottom, there are lots of little jobs that I can be getting on with and I am making plans for each day I am off Personally I couldn’t see me working beyond that time but then I hate my job so can’t wait to be out of here! I don’t know why but I have a feeling that our baby is going to come early as well so would prefer to make sure I at least get some time off just in case he/she does decide to make an unexpected appearance.

As for me I’ve had to book a last minute appointment with Dr as I am pretty sure I have a UTI (or the beginnings of one) luckily have managed to get in this afternoon. Hopefully they will be able to give me something for it as I don’t want it to get any worse.

Got a fab bargain on Ebay last night – a moses basket from the Mothercare “My Jungle Family” range with a stand for £15 Turns out the seller is two roads up from me so am going to go and collect it this evening. Am pretty happy as the moses basket alone is £40 in Mothercare

Hope all ladies and bumps have a good day