What do you wish you had known with your first newborn?

Winky,_The_House_Elf

I'm due with my first baby on the 19th, so not long to go!:j

What do you wish you had known or did especially in those first few weeks?

All experiences/suggestions really appreciated:)

Winky x

[Deleted User]

Enjoying those last few weeks as a couple more than what we did for starters.

Going with the flow and doing what we thought was right rather than a book or friend or MW, Everyone has an opinion but its what you can handle or think that is what counts.

There is loads more but i was just heading off to bed when this caught my eye.

Good luck, my baby boy is going to be 4 on the 17th! Actually there is another one, enjoy each moment however challenging, tired or stressed you are, because it passes so quickly and that problem that your facing now, is soon gone to be replaced by another!

Supermom

I wish I'd told my MIL to leave me alone!!!! the woman thought it was her right to be in my house day and night telling me what to do:mad:

She really spoilied those first few weeks, remember this is YOUR baby and you know what's best.

Please enjoy them they go way tooo fast

ab7167

Babies can live perfectly happily in babygros. You know your own child better than the Health Visitor does. It's OK to tell people to make you a cup of tea when they visit rather than the other way round. A bit of dust never hurt anyone. Dummies are a godsend if you have a baby that wants to suck all the time (I have one that couldn't live without a dummy and one that was never interested). Sleep deprivation does hideous things to your state of mind, but it will get better.

Hope it goes well!

**curlywurly**

I wish I had known how quickly time goes, and to enjoy every minute without fretting. And I wish I had listened to my mother who told me how to get DD to sleep through the night! I also wish I had known not to set my standards too high - my child will have nothing second hand, will have no milk other than milupa, no nappies other than huggies, we will live in a perfectly clean house etc etc. None of that matters. sleep when the baby sleeps, don't worry about what anyone else thinks, don't feel guilty if you can't/don't want to BF, and most of all trust your instinct.

WASHER

I wish I haven't read the mother and baby magazines with pictures of a woman looking "made up" with a sleeping baby by her side in a really tidy kitchen, cause that just doesn't happen.

My best advice is to sleep when your baby sleeps, forget the housework - your house will never be the same again for at least 18 years, ignore the doorbell, and enjoy your baby, those first few weeks with a first newborn are very special, I wish I could turn the clock back and I would do things very differently.

EDIT: Trust your instincts, you don't have to listen to the health Visitor, I found them useless to be honest,I asked one of them to leave my home as she was giving far too much advice and not listening - She hadn't even had a child of her own!

julie2710

Dummies are fine. A bit of dirt does not kill them! They can get into routines quickly. Do not shut yourself away - get out even if it's just for a 10 minute walk each day.
The feed time I treasured the most was the 2am feed. I used to sit in the lounge with just the light from the streetlights outside, everything was peaceful and quiet and it was "our special time, whilst the rest of the world slept"
Increase last thing at night feeds and try not to increase the 2am feed if possible.
Health Visitors aren't always that helpful
Trust your instincts
Don't feel guilty if you can't or don't want to stick with breast feeding, don't let anyone make you feel guilty either. A fortune has been spent by manufacturers to ensure that formula milk gives your baby what it needs too!
Enjoy those first few weeks, they fly!
Good luck

Becles

You get plenty of advice on the pregnancy and birth, and plenty of advice on caring for your newborn baby, but nobody tells you how you will feel.

You'll get after-pains for a few days after birth. They're like contractions and can make you stop and gasp, but it's nothing to worry about. It's just your uterus contracting back down to it's normal size. I was worried sick about these pains

I was told the after bleeding was nothing more than a period, so I was horrified when I used a thin Always pad and woke up after a nap with blood soaked through onto my pyjamas. Do buy thick maternity pads as it can be quite heavy for the first couple of days.

Your milk will come in about three days after birth, regardless of if you breast feed or not. Your boobs will swell up, feel like rocks and be uncomfortable for about 24 hours.

If you have any grazes or tears down there, it will sting a bit when you go for a wee

It can take a few days before you go for a poo. That's normal too, so don't worry about that either.

Sorry if I've scared you off now, but these were all things that nobody told me before I had my first, and I got myself really worried about them

hitchins

I wish I didn't have a living room like Piccadily Circus when I returned home from hospital, I know people want to see the new arrival, but you need some space.

I also wish I'd realised how even larger the old boobies would get and blooming rock hard and painful....so stock up on some larger bras and cabbages!!

Apart from my two penneth, just go with the flow, it's sort of one of them things you can never fully prepare for. x

escortg3

when you have visitors and they ask what you need doing tell them. oh there is some ironing or the washing. make use of people.

The Do's

every night have a good hour long soak in the bath.
live in comfy pj's and dressing gown
sleep when baby sleeps if tired
make an appointment at the hairdressers for two weeks after and get a baby sitter and have a night out
Plenty of cuddles with other half, dont leave them out.
Take loads of pictures

The Dont's

dont run around making visitors drinks.
Dont worry about the housework
Dont walk to far to early, ouch.
if you dont want visitors dont answer the door
dont listen to advice as it will be different from each person, do it your way.

lloydlf

I knew this stuff but wish I'd been more confident in telling people to back off and let me do it my way

1. Holding babies doesn't spoil them. It relaxes them, makes them feel safe, secure, loved and comforted. In the long run it leads to more confident, secure children. Sling, carry, hold your baby as much as you like in the confidence that you are doing only good.

2. Breastfeeding can be damn hard work but like anything you learn it gets easier and relatively quickly and after that it is SO easy

3. Children don't need to be trained.

4. Everyone has an opinion but the only one that matters is yours