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Money Moral Dilemma: Should I lose my holiday deposits?

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Money Moral Dilemma: Should I lose my holiday deposits?

59 replies 20.7K views
Former_MSE_LeeFormer_MSE_Lee Former Editorial Assistant
343 posts
Please give this MoneySaver the benefit of your advice...
Should I lose my holiday deposits?

After 2 lovely holidays in Turkey with a friend in 2009, she pleaded with me to book 2 more for the following year in, saying we've been friends 22 years, and even if she met someone she'd still go with me. I went ahead and booked 2 holidays, paying all deposits as she had no money at the time. You guessed it. She met someone and when the balance of the first holiday was due, cancelled and then cancelled the 2nd holiday. I couldn't find anyone to go with me on either holiday. Should I lose my deposits, as it was not my fault that she cancelled?

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  • If your friend asked you to book the holidays without being able to pay her deposits, allowed you to lay out for them, then cancelled even though she assured you that she wouldn't, she should be thoroughly ashamed of herself. This is appalling behaviour, especially from someone whose friendship you have valued for so long. She should reimburse you in full for everything you have paid out for these holidays, and you should think very carefully before you agree to do anything with her again.
  • Your friend should make sure you do not loose out financially - and she should be prepared to pay you back for the loss of her company on the holiday aswell. Pity you didn't book a cruise as I'd like someone to share the cabin with!!
  • scotsbobscotsbob Forumite
    4.6K posts
    You shouldn't, but your going to!

    From now on you should certainly refer to her as your ex frend. Sounds like the kind of person you're better off without.
  • Your friend should definitely reimburse you for the monies you have laid out. If she is a true friend she won't think twice about doing this.
  • bogwartbogwart Forumite
    117 posts
    Obviously the best solution would be to find someone to replace her. But for want of that she definitely has a moral duty to repay to you her part of the costs. I'm afraid you'll have to bear the cost of your own. It's an expensive lesson but one worth learning.
  • iclayticlayt Forumite
    433 posts
    She should pay you for her half of the deposits - if you paid them for her in the first place she should have been preparing to repay you those anyway. Personally I would want her to pay me back for every penny I'd lost, but if you've been friends so long perhaps going 50/50 would be best to save any last arguments.

    It never fails to amaze me how friends who play the 'we've been friends forever!' card conveniently forget this when someone/something better comes along. If you really are such good friends she should've offered to repay you straight away without you ever needing to ask. Point this out to her.
  • She should at the very least pay her half, she is bang out of order.

    A new bloke cannot replace a friendship that old or a promise made to a friend. How rude.



    I echo the previous poster in saying she should have been preparing to pay you the deposits back anyway.

  • She should pay you back, theres no way you should be out of pocket.

    Not only should she cover her deposit loss but yours as well, as you cannot go because of this.

    She needs teaching a lesson.

    No doubt when this relationship goes belly up, that you'll be the 1st person she comes running to, you need to tell her thats she's paying so that she doesnt think your a push over.

    Some people just take, take, take and never think how thier actions have serious consequences on others.

    If I was the ''friend'' and i found myself in a situation where for whatever reason I couldnt go I would never leave the other person outta pocket. I would immediately pay up, and apologise profuslely, but im not the kind of person who would do that to someone else.

    I know you dont want to go on your own, but sometimes, you can speak to the travel agents, explaining the situation, and they ''might'' rebook, you'll loose some money but not all of it. And of course the price could go up. Loads of people go on their own these days. You wouldnt be the only one.
    :TIs thankful to those who have shared their :T
    :T fortune with those less fortunate :T
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  • jenniewbjenniewb Forumite
    12.8K posts
    I've been Money Tipped!
    ✭✭✭✭✭
    NO! She broke her word- she let you down, she needs to pay up. Either she is too besotted to see the damage she has caused (just financially at the moment) or she is utterly stupid and needs the thing spelt out to her. You need to go for a coffee, (her expense I think!) have time to explain the ins and outs and financial side of breaking the contract but not before reminding her of the promises she made to you which have now been broken.

    22 Years of friendship have got to count for something and if they don't, you gotta wonder how long her current relationship will last and who she will now run to when it all ends in tears. Maybe its in her best interest to explain the reason she needs to pay the deposit for you or find an alternative solution.
  • ailuro2ailuro2 Forumite
    7.5K posts
    Steal her new bloke, take him on holiday with you, the name change should cost less than the lost deposit??




    Have a read through your paperwork, find out what date you can cancel up to and ONLY lose your deposit. She might break up with the new man and change her mind about going, so I'd not rush into anything.
    Ask her for the deposit, see if you can get vouchers or something with the travel agent towards the cost of a singles holiday for yourself.;)
    Member of the first Mortgage Free in 3 challenge, no.19
    Balance 19th April '07 = minus £27,640
    Balance 1st November '09 = mortgage paid off with £1903 left over. Title deeds are now ours.
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