support for those affected by alcohol
in Debt free diaries
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sorry i have been incognito have had a few things to deal with ... but i am back now ... thank you very much ruby for letting everyone know what was happening ... and welcome to the support thread ... t hings got really bad with hubby and i had to take time to sort out what i was going to do ...
the current situation is this ... hubby finally starts his counselling on wednesday and he now finally see's this other woman for what she is
he has started to understand some of the things i say to him .... for instance i have told him over the years that watching someone you love slowly kill themself really hurts alot ... seeing them slowly destroy every part of themselves destroys part of you too ...
him seeing this other woman has allowed him to see that ... this person to let you all understand was the first girl he ever kissed (at the grand old age of 11) the first girl he ever really cared for ... and now this woman is an alcoholic ( i dont want to describe her here as it may seem that i am a jelous bitter person ) he can now see a person he cared for killing themself and he knows there is nothing he can do to stop it at all ... he said to me el ... you have said that to me over the years and i have always discounted what you have said as shock tactics as you trying to control me ... but now that i can see someone that i used to care for do that to themselves i can only imagine how hard it must be for you to see someone you love do that to themselves ...
his drinking is slowly improving he hasnt got wasted just as much .... he feels he is more in control of it and feels he is in the right place to deal with it ...
but that is today and i am sure as all of you out there that have loved ones that drink alot ... we all know that can change in a heart beat
how is everyone else doing ?
thanks see ... it is good to be back ... i needed that space for me to sort my head out ... but now its time to get back in control of all the areas of my life (that i can) ... thank you very much for your support it meant alot to me
things at home are getting there slowly ... hubby is now on seroxat after being taken off of citralopram ( spelling) but is struggling ... he has struggled for the last three days one day was really bad for him
with the drinking we went to a levellers concert nearly two weeks ago and he had four pints at the gig and then came home and had some more ... he woke up on the saturday with a hangover and realised that he isnt in control of his drinking yet so is back on the bandwagon ...
i am glad this happened in a way as he was slowly upping his alcohol again one pint here two pints there etc ... and there was this part of me that was scared ...what if he goes back to drinking the way he was? what if i need to go? where will i live? ( i had decided before that i aint going back to where we were)
i have been sitting ready to leave for so long that i didnt recognise that i was ... i have called it flight ... that may be it's proper name i dont know .. but i have been sitting in flight mode for so long waiting and ready to fly ... this was starting to become an issue for me and i thought do i want to spend the rest of my life in flight mode? no i dont ... so i had a chat with a friend about it all ... she suggested i sort out my flight plan " get it sorted el ... that way if you ever need it it's all done for you ... thats not to say it is what you want ... but it is to protect you incase that is what you need" .... so i did ... i sorted out my flight plan ... and you know what it worked ... i now know what i will do where i will go etc if i feel i need to leave ... that worry has now been taken away from me ... and i can concentrate on being in the present ... working on what i need to and want to
not sure if this info helps anyone but i thought i would share it just incase
how is everyone ?