MSE Parents Club Part 15

threemuttleys

Hello all.

Im not sure im putting this in the right place, so please move if it is wrong.

Please be gentle as I am a first time mum

Alex is 4 weeks old tomorrow, everything is (or was) going ok..but im starting to struggle and im hoping some experienced mummies (and daddies can help)

Im finding it difficult to know what to "do" to entertain him when he is awake...im desperate to ensure that he develops properly, but most of the toys that are from birth, arent really suitable for a baby who cannot sit up, or doesnt yet have hand co ordintation. I play music all the time, we have a playgym, I lay him on his tummy for a few mins at a time, we go for walks with the mutts (sling) is there something I am missing?

He also seems to throw up an awful lot, pretty much after every feed, and when I get him up after a nap or sleep, he has puke all down his sleepsuit/clothes. I breast feed, and burp after every feed. On advice of HV he has Infacol (he gets very gripey/colicy) seems to help, and she also suggested a dummy (which we do use, tho he doesnt seem that interested in them)

Also in the afternoons/early evening, he doesnt nothing but feed...im wondering if my boobs are giving him enough? He will feed solidly off one, and then I will offer the other one. Very rarely takes it, so I put him back down (after burping) within mins he is crying to be fed, so ends up with the other one. What am I doing wrong?

Please help xx

GobbledyGook

Firstly you are doing nothing wrong!

You aren't missing anything with regards to playing with him. Tbh at that age they don't need much stimulation at all. That'll come into play once he's bigger. You are doing plenty!

Speak to your HV or GP and get him checked for reflux. Some babies are just naturally sicky, but some do have reflux. With Josiah the HV spotting reflux (I thought he was just whingey/colicy/sicky) was a godsend to my washing basket! And to the baby as well because the medicine they give him helps him keep his milk down much better.

Cluster feeding in the evening is very, very normal. Also 4 weeks is a classic time for a growth spurt so he'll be feeding/wanting to feed even more than normal. If he regularly feeds from one side, then refuses the other for a short while then perhaps put him in his wee bouncer once he's burped for a few minutes while you grab a cuppa or something, then offer him the second side.

You are doing nothing wrong. Babies don't come with an instruction manual so we all have to just make it up as we go along. Be kind to yourself.

SusanC_2

always29 wrote: »

Now scaring myself reading about VBAC's - anyone got any really good links / info?? Really should call GP I guess - or perhaps just bypass and go straight to the midwife I had on the high risk team before? Or maybe just go into denial for a few weeks, yes, that's a good plan, I like that.

I believe the vaginal birth rate with VBACs is about the same as for first births. Do you know the reasons why you had a CS last time as that may be a factor?

Here are a few links:
http://betterbirth.blogspot.com/
http://www.ican-online.org/
http://yourbirthmatters.blogspot.com/
http://empoweredbirth.typepad.com/
http://hospitaltohome.blogspot.com/
http://pushedbirth.com/
http://www.vbac.com/informedconsent.html

donnaessex

You aren't doing anything wrong lovely. xxx

Firstly, congratulations! He sounds very much like my first child was - she was a very greedy baby (also breastfed) and would feed every hour until she was well over 12 weeks - it was exhausting! I spoke to loads of different people about it and was always told "all babies are different" and its so true.

You will always produce enough milk for him but some babies like to suckle to relax, and some are just greedy! My daughter regularly put on 12oz a week. My son however was completely different and straight away settled into 3-4 hourly feeds and was a skinny slip of a thing.

Keeping a 4 week old entertained is very easy! They don't need toys, or games - just their mums face to stare at! They love looking at faces and my advice would be to get out and about with your sling so he can be carried around and look around his surroundings at will.

threemuttleys

thank you both for your responses.

One thing I forgot to mention in my Op..is that Alex latches on really well onto one side (left) but really struggles with the right one...is that normal?

I felt terrible earlier, I was downstairs in the kitchen, he was in the spare room in his carry cot snoozing (or was!) I couldnt hear a thing, got back up stairs and he was screaming his head off, actually had tears in his eyes...been feeling terribly guilty since then.

This baby lark is so stressful...im sure babies would laugh at us if they knew how stressed we got

threemuttleys

Speak to your HV or GP and get him checked for reflux. Some babies are just naturally sicky, but some do have reflux. With Josiah the HV spotting reflux (I thought he was just whingey/colicy/sicky) was a godsend to my washing basket! And to the baby as well because the medicine they give him helps him keep his milk down much better

ah..didnt know that it could be sorted...we have baby group this week so will try and get to see the GP then

vwelsh13

are you alternating sides with each feed? Maybe one breast is a bit full and baby is finding it difficult to latch on? If so, express a bit to soften up your breast..and keep going..much easier (and better) than bottles

good luck x

(mum, nan + diploma in nursery nursing)

GobbledyGook

Totally normal re the left and right side. Think about how you sleep or sit on the sofa? We all tend to have a "favoured" side. Doing things the other way round just takes a bit of getting used too and a bit of practise - for Mummy and baby.

Don't feel guilty. This morning I was so, so hungry that I had to put Josiah down even though he was screaming (he's not very well atm) and get myself something to eat. There are times, sometimes, when we have to let the baby cry because of something. You didn't hear him, you didn't leave him to scream because you couldn't be bothered! These things happen.

It's very stressful so take care of yourself. The single most important thing to your tiny baby is a healthy, happy Mummy so look after her - for his sake!

threemuttleys

yes, I do alternate (but I admit with sleeplessness I have forgotten which one we used last on one or two occasions) I have tried squeezing some out...but makes no difference to him struggling with one or his hunger.

threemuttleys

GobbledyGook wrote: »

Totally normal re the left and right side. Think about how you sleep or sit on the sofa? We all tend to have a "favoured" side. Doing things the other way round just takes a bit of getting used too and a bit of practise - for Mummy and baby.

Don't feel guilty. This morning I was so, so hungry that I had to put Josiah down even though he was screaming (he's not very well atm) and get myself something to eat. There are times, sometimes, when we have to let the baby cry because of something. You didn't hear him, you didn't leave him to scream because you couldn't be bothered! These things happen.

It's very stressful so take care of yourself. The single most important thing to your tiny baby is a healthy, happy Mummy so look after her - for his sake!

good point...didnt think of that.

Thank you xx