Any SAHMs have "help"?

milliebear00001

Well I work full-time and my husband is at home full time with our kids. We have an ironing lady as this is the job we both detest the most. She is well worth the money. Husband does most of the cleaning while the kids are out.

thatgirlsam

sassyblue wrote: »

I work school hours and have a cleaner once a week - it's a god send to walk in and have a lovely clean home. If you can afford it why not, as long as time saved is spent on your child/ren (if you know what l mean) if someone wanted help but spent their time on themselves it's for the wrong reasons.

Best piece of parenting advice l ever got was 'your child will never remember living in a lovely clean home when he gets older, but he will remember the times you sat playing his games with him.'

but they do remember living in a pig sty! (not saying you do)

just that i grew up in a very untidy house.. and it made me quite anxious and unhappy.. some days didn't have clean underwear to put on etc
... it REALLY did affect me as a child, i was embarressed to have friends round

don't get me wrong, my mum loved us to bits, she just hated housework

as a result i am a clean freak and feel out of control if my house is a mess

its hard work, im a single mum, work 30 hours a week and am studying for a foundation degree

would love some help but hey ho.. gotta get on with it myself

Rosetta_2

I work 25 hours a week (school hours ) and have a commute of about 40 minutes each way, I have a cleaner come in once a week. She hoovers everywhere and does the bathroom. Makes a huge difference. MY OH works long hours and also has to go abroad for work. I agree about single Mums having to manage, when he is away it is much harder.

pelirocco

clairibel wrote: »

I've never had any help from anyone since giving birth (husband clueless and MIL and mother are selfish) to DS who's now 8 and i used to be a neat freak but life has taught me to let it go as i cannot do it all on my own...it makes me ill (proof is trying to be everything)

So dust and scum do not phase me like they used to.....i can live with them for an evening or two! I work part time as a cleaner funnily enough...other peoples homes are gleaming..shame about my own lol :rotfl:

Because they dont help you?

bylromarha

thatgirlsam wrote: »

but they do remember living in a pig sty! (not saying you do)

just that i grew up in a very untidy house.. and it made me quite anxious and unhappy.. some days didn't have clean underwear to put on etc
... it REALLY did affect me as a child, i was embarressed to have friends round

Ditto.

Our house growing up was shocking - still is when I visit Mum.

I never invited friends back as I'd been to their homes and was hugely embarrassed about mine.

My sister went the mad cleaning way, I went the "it's not as bad as mum's" way and do as little as possible :rotfl:

I'd love a cleaner as I hate cleaning, but don't want to pay for one!

milliebear00001

bylromarha wrote: »

Ditto.

Our house growing up was shocking - still is when I visit Mum.

I never invited friends back as I'd been to their homes and was hugely embarrassed about mine.

My sister went the mad cleaning way, I went the "it's not as bad as mum's" way and do as little as possible :rotfl:

I'd love a cleaner as I hate cleaning, but don't want to pay for one!

My mum grew up in a house like that - 1950s - only girl with 5 brothers! She became obsessive about things being tidy. It caused endless issues in our house as none of us were allowed any privacy as she constantly had to tidy our things too. She now accepts that she made unreasonable demands of us then, and it is a big regret of hers. She feels it is definitely a compulsion brought on by her own childhood living conditions. I am reasonably tidy, but not to the extent that it means my kids can't do anything in the house!

Conversely, I couldn't often have friends around because we made too much mess!

thatgirlsam

milliebear00001 wrote: »

My mum grew up in a house like that - 1950s - only girl with 5 brothers! She became obsessive about things being tidy. It caused endless issues in our house as none of us were allowed any privacy as she constantly had to tidy our things too. She now accepts that she made unreasonable demands of us then, and it is a big regret of hers. She feels it is definitely a compulsion brought on by her own childhood living conditions. I am reasonably tidy, but not to the extent that it means my kids can't do anything in the house!

Conversely, I couldn't often have friends around because we made too much mess!

i really have to watch myself over things like that

sometimes when the kids want to paint or playdough or whatever i want to say no because of the mess

but i always let them make a mess then make then help me tidy it up

but i have been known to stand with the broom sweeping for as long as they are playing round the sand table in the garden

yummymummy1987_2

Im a stay at home mum, have been since i fell pregnant with my first not far off 7 yrs ago (where does time go) :eek:
I do everything around the house and to do with the children, feel very lucky that i dont have to work so have enough time to keep my house really clean and tidy and also spend lots of time with my children.

Im so glad others have mentioned how having a messy house can also impact on children. My mum lived in a filthy house as a child and it really has caused issues for her. She also mentioned never wanting to have friends around, being so embarssed. So many storys she has told me over the years :(:(

We both keep our homes very clean, but i learnt of her tips on how to do it so its not a detrament (sp) to the children. Work fast and daily and you have plenty of time to physically spend completly concentrating on children and partner.

tiamai_d

Wish I did.

But it's the old 'I'd be far too embarassed to have anyone see the state of the place!'. I'd have to clean the house before she/he came round and that defeats the purpose.

fernliebee

tiamai_d wrote: »

Wish I did.

But it's the old 'I'd be far too embarassed to have anyone see the state of the place!'. I'd have to clean the house before she/he came round and that defeats the purpose.

Thats exactly how I feel.

I find myself just inviting people over so it kicks my bum to give it a good clean!