I think my MIL is going to ask to move in.

Penny-Pincher!!

Not going to help much, but there is NO way on earth that I would allow my MIL to live with us. She has 6 other siblings to ask. This would also be the same with my parents also. It sounds harsh, but I have enough to deal with and we have never been close.

PP
xx

scottishchick27

Penny-Pincher!! wrote: »

Not going to help much, but there is NO way on earth that I would allow my MIL to live with us. She has 6 other siblings to ask. This would also be the same with my parents also. It sounds harsh, but I have enough to deal with and we have never been close.

PP
xx

That's the thing though, she doesn't have anyone else. Her other son died years ago and she's estranged from all but one of her siblings. She is going to stay with her sister for a fortnight shortly so that'll give us a bit of leeway.

moodydonkey

scottishchick27 wrote: »

That's two of my main fears, one that it will affect my relationship with my partner and the other that it will affect the realtionship we have with the MIL. We get on very well at the moment but I do like my own space and would probably find it hard having someone else in the house all the time, even my own mother. I really can't see there being a happy outcome to this at all but I keep thinking what would I do if it was my mother who was going to be homeless? Saying that, my mum would never put us in this position.
Good luck to you and your partner, I hope it works out for you.

If you were putting your MIL up I would imagine any progress with the council would become very slow. EVERY relationship would change, thats not to say it would be for the worst.

I became homeless and moved in with a friend (we both had kids so yes it was a different situation)

It is easy to become apathetic and let the situation slide and you carry on without putting as much effort into resolving your situation as you could. Relationships get strained.

With the best intentions you could end up resentful of how you are living.

Obviously family comes first. And that means your family too so I personally would not have her move in but support her fully even if it's cash for a deposit somewhere if possible.

Probably no help cos I waffle but I feel for you.

scottishchick27

If she does move in with us no way will I let it slide. I'll be calling the council every day to hurry things along.

moodydonkey

scottishchick27 wrote: »

If she does move in with us no way will I let it slide. I'll be calling the council every day to hurry things along.

I found a place happily but my friend did write a letter with notice to evict due to overcrowding (not sure if that is relevant if you are not in council housing yourselves) to effectively make me homeless. With the council have you got to the stage where they have decided your MIL is intentionally homeless, i realise this is stil a bit theoretical at the moment.

mandi

scottishchick27 wrote: »

If she does move in with us no way will I let it slide. I'll be calling the council every day to hurry things along.

Just a note . If she moves in with you , she will not be considered as a priority be the council .. You would be in for a long wait regardless of how many calls you make .

scottishchick27

moodydonkey wrote: »

I found a place happily but my friend did write a letter with notice to evict due to overcrowding (not sure if that is relevant if you are not in council housing yourselves) to effectively make me homeless. With the council have you got to the stage where they have decided your MIL is intentionally homeless, i realise this is stil a bit theoretical at the moment.

The last I heard about it was that her partner sent a letter, the same as your friend did, so I don't think they assume she has made herself intentionally homeless. She also had to get assessed for medical points. I think I'll have to send the same kind of letter to them too.

scottishchick27

mandi wrote: »

Just a note . If she moves in with you , she will not be considered as a priority be the council .. You would be in for a long wait regardless of how many calls you make .

Oh don't say that. I'll bloody camp outside their office.

moodydonkey

scottishchick27 wrote: »

The last I heard about it was that her partner sent a letter, the same as your friend did, so I don't think they assume she has made herself intentionally homeless. She also had to get assessed for medical points. I think I'll have to send the same kind of letter to them too.

Well best of luck with it all and from what i've read mandi knows what she is talking about, I can only go on personal experience but I would say don't wait and take any correspondence directly to the council rather than back and forthing in the post.

mandi

scottishchick27 wrote: »

Oh don't say that. I'll bloody camp outside their office.

I'm sorry Scottish but its true I'm afraid . Your MIL would be a priority if she was homeless , but living with relatives could honestly take a long , long time . Be very careful before you make a decision hun , and take some advice sooner rather than later..