Its tough, it will get better and guess what its freezing brrrrr!

starsandmoon

bluebag wrote: »

I have had the same mobile hairdresser for 14 or so years, she does exactly what I want, not anything trendy, just a simple short cut and keeps the grey at bay.

She has enough work to earn a living and does a few old folks homes too, shampoo and set/perms.

I wonder if you re-trained, if the flexibility of being your own boss would help with the childcare situation, that is assuming the worst, you never know your job may be OK. Hoping so for you.

I was an average hairdresser not quite Vidal Sasoon lol. Could do a spray tan course as hailing from Liverpool there are a lot of orange ladies who pay for fake tan before anything else!:rotfl:

I have a car so could do mobile hairdressing and as you say would fit in with childcare. Hmmmm looking interesting. Could take daughter with me too if I had a childcare blip.

See thats whats great about this thread, you come on all depressed and someone always cheers you up or shows you a way to solve a problem:T

NualaBuala

Just wanted to send hugs to anyone who needs them. :grouphug:

ChocClare

Parsonswife, sorry to hear your health is suffering: I was just thinking this morning as I got up (in the dark) that this time of year is just not conducive to bright and happy thoughts. Some winter days you have crisp blue skies, brilliant sunshine, sparkling frosts - easy to have numinous feelings when that happens; easier still to drown in the fog when that and dark and rain are what surrounds you.

Hope tomorrow is a better day :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:

greent

(((((Hugs))))) to Katholicos, Kittie, zarazra & parsonswife - we're away in Edinburgh and I've only skimmed - so ((hugs)) to anyone else needing them

Rosanna79

A big thank you for your advice yesterday. My friend has already started to put some of the suggestions into action and already the manager has backed down. She's incredulous that this woman should 'kick her when she's down'. From my own experience I discovered that the statistics for NHS bullying of staff runs at about 1 in 5 at any given time - roughly 20%. Great in a caring profession!

Sorry to hear of so many people struggling and yet heartened to see the amazing level of support everyone gives.

Have any of you older posters experienced being forced to retire from a profession or job you loved, either for health reasons, being forced out or a combination of these? Did you go from a very busy work life, up very early into the gym or the pool before starting and then working frantically all day often with no breaks?

That was my life for 6 years after moving back home from London and working in another town. I 've managed to find a whole new life and meet a whole load of new people through the activities I've become involved in as well as having a lot more time to spend with my husband who being unable to find work after the move already had his own routine established.

That's OK as I'm a lark and he's an owl but I just cannot seem to get myself up and going really early which I used to like as I love the early mornings. I'm just sooooo tired a lot of the time and as my sister in law said during her last visit from Ireland , I've needed a lot of recovery time from the awful stress etc from my job.

Never being a person to give in to weakness during my working life it's as though all the chickens have come home to roost now I've stopped HAVING to race about. It's as though my 'get up and go has got up and gone'! All I've really managed to achieve today is turning the 1 kg of green tomatoes from my greenhouse into 6 1/2 jars of green tomato chutney. Then I promptly fell asleep in the chair! My DH had to cook the tea which he gladly does . He's ace.

I wouldn't mind if I were really old but at 61 I keep meeting 80 year olds with more energy and drive than I seem able to summon up at present.

It's possibly clinical depression fought off with busyness , constant activity and regular exercise since I lost my brother in early 2007. He and his partner lived in western Ireland and the send off he got and the support from the Irish people was absolutely fantastic.

In my neck of the woods we say 'Git yersen behind yersen and give yersen a kick'!! I am trying but wonder if anyone else my age group has experienced this and does it eventually pass?

We're both ending up needing a season ticket at the GPs , rather like a couple of vintage cars that need regular servicing!!

Sorry for the ramble , feeling a bit down today though what I have to complain about when I hear others
I stories I can't imagine.

jackieglasgow

I have learned very recently Rosanna that no one and everyone has a reason to be down, and your reasons are just as valid or invalid as the next persons. They are your feelings, own them (to quote that horrible Americanism), and deal with them, never mind worrying about what anyone else would do. :)I am great at giving the advice, taking it myself is a whole other tale. xx

katholicos

Rosanna79 wrote: »

A big thank you for your advice yesterday. My friend has already started to put some of the suggestions into action and already the manager has backed down. She's incredulous that this woman should 'kick her when she's down'. From my own experience I discovered that the statistics for NHS bullying of staff runs at about 1 in 5 at any given time - roughly 20%. Great in a caring profession!

Sorry to hear of so many people struggling and yet heartened to see the amazing level of support everyone gives.

Have any of you older posters experienced being forced to retire from a profession or job you loved, either for health reasons, being forced out or a combination of these? Did you go from a very busy work life, up very early into the gym or the pool before starting and then working frantically all day often with no breaks?

That was my life for 6 years after moving back home from London and working in another town. I 've managed to find a whole new life and meet a whole load of new people through the activities I've become involved in as well as having a lot more time to spend with my husband who being unable to find work after the move already had his own routine established.

That's OK as I'm a lark and he's an owl but I just cannot seem to get myself up and going really early which I used to like as I love the early mornings. I'm just sooooo tired a lot of the time and as my sister in law said during her last visit from Ireland , I've needed a lot of recovery time from the awful stress etc from my job.

Never being a person to give in to weakness during my working life it's as though all the chickens have come home to roost now I've stopped HAVING to race about. It's as though my 'get up and go has got up and gone'! All I've really managed to achieve today is turning the 1 kg of green tomatoes from my greenhouse into 6 1/2 jars of green tomato chutney. Then I promptly fell asleep in the chair! My DH had to cook the tea which he gladly does . He's ace.

I wouldn't mind if I were really old but at 61 I keep meeting 80 year olds with more energy and drive than I seem able to summon up at present.

It's possibly clinical depression fought off with busyness , constant activity and regular exercise since I lost my brother in early 2007. He and his partner lived in western Ireland and the send off he got and the support from the Irish people was absolutely fantastic.

In my neck of the woods we say 'Git yersen behind yersen and give yersen a kick'!! I am trying but wonder if anyone else my age group has experienced this and does it eventually pass?

We're both ending up needing a season ticket at the GPs , rather like a couple of vintage cars that need regular servicing!!

Sorry for the ramble , feeling a bit down today though what I have to complain about when I hear others
I stories I can't imagine.

If it is depression/anxiety that you have then you probably already know that in itself depression is very, very tiring. Mental strain can be tougher than some physical incapacity. Well done on making all that lovely chutney. I made some chutneys this year with my home grown veg. When you are eating it and enjoying it in the winter months, give yourself a pat on the back for having made it using your own resources and skills, your own home grown produce, and for being OS savvy...bought chutney rarely tastes as good as homemade

gailey_2

kidcat wrote: »

Gailey - re prams, I bought a very expensive double pram when my youngest was born as I needed it to be fit for newborn and toddler, get in and out of house/ shops etc and fold and fit into both cars (one is small hatch other is MPV with almost no boot space) and also fit into my dads car too (big car very unreliable and regularly ended up calling dad!!) a few weeks later it was stolen from the car!! Was absolutely livid but resorted to using the second hand one I had used when child minding. There were major differences in both style and practicality - and having had the luxury of testing a few types I was able to make a informed decision - I would suggest contacting your local childminders support group - they will have tried all the double prams under the sun - and they can help you choose the type. Whether you buy second hand or not - well that has to depend on your finances and if you can find the right model in the right condition.
Ironically I went on to purchase a replacement for the stolen pram (which I think shows I had made right choice in first place) and it was used very little!!
If you want any help on picking PM me and I can talk you through some of the ones I tried and the problems/good points.

The only thing I would say is - will you really need a double pram? I ask because I often ended up taking the single pram and using a buggy board or a baby carrier, because no double buggy is ideal when shopping. (In fact near Christmas shops deliberately squash up their displays and that prevents any idea of getting a double pram round)

On a OS note - have made a mental Christmas list today and will be committing it to paper later when all kids in bed. Means I can hit sales and bargains as I find them, rather than impulse purchasing for the kids - I always mess up when I impulse buy and find I have bought too much for one and not enough for the others!!! Funny how each year its a different child I find it easier to buy for - last year was youngest daughter who was 3, this year is DS 12. Could spend a fortune on him - but am struggling with the others ! (Needs confused smiley )

Off to Blackpool tomorrow to see the lights and taking my parents with us, should be interesting as any outing with my parents usually costs a bomb, but I have said its strictly see the lights and stop for some fish and chips. Taking drinks and snacks too!!

Thanks kidcat/lindyloo for pram advice.

decided on a brand as have narrow front door some singles dont even fit, want it to take carseat , be light to push as my 13month old is quite heavy and will be 18months when baby comes along, shes already a hanful she can walk but wont hold hands or walk in right direction plus I have 20min walk to school on busy major road so need a double least initially reckon for 1st year at least as dont drive either.

Decided after much research as already tried 2double side by sides with current 2 as had nipper and mb terrain.
In reality hated them both!
Umbrella fold doubles look anitemare to push and still quite wide.
decided on phil and ted as will be using it for least 5years , fits through door, converts to single as well, lots storage for shopping, fits carseat currently in loft, good in all weathers. light to push and has high weight limit.

However they discontinued the sport model and brought out new explorer which has many improvements in combinations and fold.
if i brought 2nd hand which i normally do would wonder if would be good value depends how much use it had by previous owners as people seem to keep them for years and seen some tatty ones on ebay, actually owned it as a single few years ago with 1st.
But prams tend to have annaul increase each year plus 2.5percent vat so dont know what to do.

need to have a serious think.

sorry to everyone having tough time will try catch up tommorow.
right best go bed as shattered want to achive more tommorow than did today.

rosieben

Rosanna, my last boss was an ex-NHS director and she nearly drove me to a breakdown; Access to Work wanted me to claim constructive dismissal but I just couldn't cope with that. I was ill for what should have been the last 3 years of my working life and I felt guilty the whole time as I was brought up in a strong work ethic; I retired officially about 18 months ago but it was a few months before I started to relax and realise that its ok to not be rushing out the door at 6.30am etc etc

There's a great freedom in being retired and when younger people are envious I remind them that I did my 40 years in the rat race, now its my time; I drop off in front of the tv - I very often see the start of one prog and wake up in time to watch the end of the next!

I hope you feel better soon, give yourself a while to wind down from the pressure of the job; do you have any hobbies? the greatest pleasure for me is having time to do the scrapbooking, card making and crafting I've always loved


sending <<hugs>> and positive thoughts to all who are troubled

Rosanna79

Jackie, Katholicos and Rosebien
Thank you for your support. much appreciated.

Rosebien.- I can really connect with the topic of a ghastly manager. I went off sick initially with apparent stroke symptoms which turned out to be work related stress. Had a brief 4 week phased return but was then walking for 16 weeks with 2 sticks after a very severe arthritic flare.Then I finally had to give up work,

I've clawed my way back to mobility and walk with the council scheme 'walking the way to health'. Getting out and meeting people if there's a led walk as these are does help socially. Yes I do have a number of interests from gardening, playing the flute with a Quire (with a Q!) and I do creative writing with an over 50s group-

What I find most enjoyable at the moment though surprises me in that it is craftwork.. A short course on making bags from old jeans taught by a fabulous tutor has inspired my creative side and I do a weekly embroidery class with the same group of women .

As I type this it does sound rather a lot and I'm being a bit like a kid in a sweet shop hardly knowing what to do next! I'm certainly not bored... Just feel a bit young to have to use a stick for safety's sake and to be dropping off in my armchair!! Really glad I'm not the only one falling asleep.

Just need to give it time and listen to my body I guess. Always been good at meeting myself coming back...

Thanks so much all of you