Double Trouble but twice as nice

shaun40400

HI :(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(

WILL RING YOU TOMORROW EVENING IF I GET A CHANCE
:grouphug::grouphug:
S XX

Karmacat

DT, wait, don't go .... please have a think about this. I understand that your DD might not want to be mentioned on here, okay, I get that, and as she *seems* to be becoming more independent, and maybe have her own web presence, you want to go along with that. But in relation to debt repayment, decision about the villa, a new business - surely, you need to keep posting? The posting would probably need to be more focussed, with other stuff being fluff, not the depth of it, but surely you still need the depth of the debt-related posting? Don't just shut down, please.

taxi73

i totally agree with Karma here...xxxx loads of hugs xx

gilligansyle

(((hugs)))

What KC and taxi have said. Please take some time and have a think about it. Post in a more focussed way about the business and the debt.


Take care

G
x

hypno06

DT, I know how hard it is. Earlier in the year, not long after OH had walked out, my MiL told me that I shouldn't be surprised that he had left me after the things that I post on MSE. Now, it transpired that my SiL reads my diary, and had decided to selectively point out things to my MiL, which she then decided to consider good enough reasons for ending a 20 year marriage.

What my SiL was doing, however, was failing to point out the support that I get from this site, and the every day struggles that I had been through in order to simply put food on the table and keep a roof over our heads at times.

I was devastated, and at the time said that I would have to stop posting here, because that sort of venom was more hurtful in many ways than the actual act of OH leaving me (if that makes sense) because OH had reasons (what they are, I don't yet know, but he must have them!) whereas I don't understand what was to be gained from what SiL and MiL "extracted" from my diaries.

It was actually OH who encouraged me to keep posting. Which I do, but with a great deal of care. I know, for example, that he reads my diary now, whereas he never used to before, and so I have to keep a dignified tone to my ramblings so as not to cause either of us any potential problems which could be nasty. And needless to say, I haven't spoken to SiL since, and my relationship with MiL is rather different now that I know what she *really* thinks of me. Some things, once said, can't be unsaid.

BUT, I still need MSE. I still need the support. My debt may be almost gone, but this site gives me so much more.

So don't stop posting. adapt what you write maybe, but don't stop.

xxx

Double_Trouble

Thanks for the posts I will think about it I have removed parts of posts from this diary and I am working through my old one but the damage is done it is a shame because on here I can post what I really feel which I am unable to share with friends because that feels disloyal to my daughter but on here you don't know her, you probably won't meet her and I have had some good advice which I have sorely needed - now I feel there is nobody I can discuss my feelings with OH is too involved I need an independent view and support to get through what is a very difficult time. I don't want to go and talk to a stranger and although I don't personally know most of you we share such a lot of our daily lives that I feel I know some of you a lot better than my friends.

DTxx

Karmacat

Understood, DT .... what about pms..... I know they're awkward cos you can only send them to one person at a time, and you have to already know the person you're sending to, of course. Or what about highest-privacy settings on facebook? Invite only, sort of thing? You get the same problem as with pms, but at least you can type it out just once, and sort of send out an "alert" on here.

Good luck with it all, this is a really tough one ........

taxi73

so sorry ..it must be so hard but i'm here anytime..just pm me....

taxi73

you have pm x

moo2moo

Asking you to give up your diary is like asking you not to talk to your best friends about things or to write to a penpal. The difference is rather than accidentally overhearing a conversation DD has chosen to read your diary. She might not like what shes read any more than she would have liked what she'd overheard. Its simply an outlet for your feelings and fears and support through the darkest hours of your life.

I hope you won't abandon diary land altogether but if you feel the need I hope you'll keep in touch with the many friends you've made here. Our lives are better for having you in them.