Is it too soon?

beks

OP - I feel so sorry for you and your poor kitty.

I am not going to give you more grief about this, I think that has been done enough already and I am sure you are hurting enough already so it wont be helpful. But please give it time before you get another cat - enjoy the one you have for now.

We had two cats who were sisters and when they were two (we had had them for a year as they were rescue cats), one of them got run over. She made it home and got through the cat flap before she collapsed and died at my feet. I have never forgiven myself for letting her outside that day and still grieve but it was important for us to spend the time with the cat we had left and to move on as a family and not replace her like a broken toy. After 6 months we got another cat, an elderly rescue one and we were safe in the knowledge that although our dear little cat had died an early death, we could give an elderly cat a much needed, much loved home for the rest of her life - I felt like I was giving something back that way.

For you, your children and your remaining cat, please wait before getting another kitten.

LittleTinker

samhuzz wrote: »

Hello

We had a kitten, Benji, who got into the washer without anyone knowing and died. All of our family were extremely distraught about it, and me and the kids want to get another kitten. It wasn't anyone's fault what happened, I thought he was playing outside and that's why I didn't check the washer. We have another cat who is 1 and she got into the tumble dryer once so I always was cautious with this kitten. This happened on Saturday. At first I didn't want to get another kitten, but my partner and friends have convinced me that it wasn't my fault what happened. Now I'd like to get another one and so would the kids, but my partner thinks it might be too soon. I think it would help us to get over what happened. I'm not trying to replace Benji or anything. What do you think?

Thanks very much

Sam

Are you kidding??????

It most certainly is your fault that the kitten died a horrifying death because as a pet owner you have an absolute duty to care for them and protect them from danger, the same way you would a child.

That does mean always checking washers and driers, especially with a kitten!

I cannot believe how irresponsible you have been and now want another cat as though its as natural as anything! :eek:
You ought to be prosecuted and banned from keeping pets, not considering getting a new one!!

That is, of course, if you are not just trolling.

LittleTinker

samhuzz wrote: »

Thanks natlol, that was the kind of advice I was looking for. Nice to know not everyone judges people just like that, it could happen to anyone. I know it was preventable, but when you've just seen your kitten playing outside a minute before, you don't expect him to have just got into the washing machine do you? I am the last person that would ever deliberately harm an animal, people that do that sort of thing are as bad as pedos in my eyes.

No.....it couldnt happen to anyone. Most people check where a kitten is before turning a washer or dryer on.

You already had a near miss with the cat in the dryer....and now you are saying "Dont you think I would check and check again next time?".....Well no, I dont think you will. The near miss didnt make you check did it?

As for thanking someone for "the kind of advise you were looking for"........what you mean is, 'Thanks for saying what I wanted to hear".....it was not good advise.

Good advise is following the sequence set out above...........and NEVER straying from that!

wannabepennypincher

You might not like hearing the replies but to be honest it's a horrifying tale. Emotions don't come across on a forum page so all we see is someone who put their kitten through a wash is planning on replacing the poor thing 3 days later.

Kittens will get into anything and everything and I know we spent a day kitten proofing only for the wee ones to find a whole host of things to get into but once they did it once we then tried our hardest to make sure it didn't happen again. So while you may not like hearing it knowing you had already had one kitten in a drier and didn't learn from that is what I think most people find hardest to hear.

EmptyPockets

It must be wonderful to live in this perfect world some of you seem to live in, where things never go wrong and accidents never happen.

The OP made a terrible, terrible mistake. These things do happen. Would you be speaking this way to a mother whose child had pulled a hot drink from a table and scolded themselves? Would you verbally stamp on a busy father who's toddler caught the handles of a cooking pan and burned themselves? What about the handful of babies and toddlers who die each year through drowning in just a few inches of water? That innocent-looking puddle in the back garden... mum turns her back for a second... the baby drowns. Would you treat them this way?

Accidents Happen!

I cannot believe how judgemental and downright nasty some people can be. Yes, I know I'll get slated for this post and quite frankly I don't give a !!!!!!. There doesn't seem to be that much support for the OP so either people are too scared to speak up or I'm living in a world gone mad. Either way, I bloody well hope that none of you ever find yourselves in the position of having made a terrible mistake and going through the trauma this family has suffered because of it. If you need help and support, for God's sake don't come to this forum for it.

Sam made a mistake. She didn't knowingly put her kitten into the washing machine. It was an accident. The way you are treating her is disgusting.

She knows that she is responsible for what happened. She knows she will feel the guilt about what happened forever. What more do you want from her? To suggest that she should be prosecuted and banned from keeping pets, after a tragic accident, is just ridiculous. This forum can be a very nasty place sometimes.

Raksha

Definition of an accident -
a. An unexpected and undesirable event, especially one resulting in damage or harm.
b. An unforeseen incident: A series of happy accidents led to his promotion.
c. An instance of involuntary urination or defecation in one's clothing.
2. Lack of intention; chance: ran into an old friend by accident.
3. Logic A circumstance or attribute that is not essential to the nature of something.

Many things are described as 'accidents' - very often they are not 'unforeseen' - a risk assesment would have highlighted the strong possibility that the kitten would, at some time, get into one or other of the everyday devices.

No matter how many times the OP repeats 'it was an accident' does not make it so.

Can the driver who was distracted by a mobile phone and hits a pedestrian claim it was an accident? No - they failed to take precautions.

OP, I am sorry for the kitten and you and your family that this happened. I hope you learn from this that sometimes you do have to take responsibility for your actions, and if and when you get another pet, that you learn from this incident.

Lirin

This is a difficult one.

I don't think you should get a kitten for a while, you need to come to terms with it. Otherwise, you would not have felt the need to ask online.

You've had two incidents like this- I'm sure you understand you need to be extra careful in the future.

Beating yourself up over it isn't going to solve a thing.

I've had many pets- dogs raised as gundogs, kittens, stick insects, tropical fish- the sheer amount of near misses when they're young is uncountable. We lost a kitten a few years back that had crawled under my dad's bonnet for a sleep- rather unfortunately, on the fan belt. That couldn't have been prevented- kittens are inquisitive by nature, and will investigate- they're also extremely fast and great contortionists!

You're aware obviously, of the dangers posed with washing/tumble dryers- please, please be extra careful in future.

Give it a while before you think of getting a pet, and maybe look around with a critical eye over everything for dangers- I spent hours one day dismantling a kitchen unit because the Lab had got stuck behind it.

Anything with wires needs protected- Collie bit through the power leads on the CCTV one day, and gave himself a shock- fortunately the power surge kicked in, or it would have been a different story. I kicked myself that day too, it was bloody stupid, and I was aware of the danger. I'd only left the leads trailing on the ground to nip out to the car for a second. It could have been worse, fortunately, we were lucky. I don't think that makes me a bad pet owner- like children, they're everywhere, they're fast, and you have to be extremely vigilant.

Give it time.

cinderellacomplex

I'm very sorry to hear what happened to your kitten Unfortunately it does just take that one time when you don't look for something like that to happen. I agree with EmptyPockets that the attitude of some people on here has been awful though. Yes, you made a mistake and it had huge consequences but you already know that.

Raksha: "An unexpected and undesirable event" - this was not expected to happen when the OP put their wash on as they were unaware of the kitten being in there, it was not their intention in doing the wash... therefore it does qualify as an accident.

OP, I do agree that you should give it some time before getting a new cat though. Besides anything else, it helps to teach your children that pets are important members of your family that are not easily replaced. It will also let you grieve properly so that when you do get your new cat you are free to be more excited about it than sad about this kitten.

hethmar

I do hope this isnt another wind up

EmptyPockets

hethmar wrote: »

I do hope this isnt another wind up

I have spoken privately with Sam and am quite sure it is not a wind-up, Hethmar.