Life after bankruptcy?

sailorswife

Hi, I have been reading your diary. I dont post much on here, a bit of a lurker actually. Always looked for your diary first to see how you were going. I agree that your style of writing is brilliant. You have a way with words. Anyway, just wanted to send lots of hugs. You have touched me xx :kisses3:

beanielou

What a lovely post sailorswife

crumbling

savingwannabe wrote: »

Good luck Crumbling.

Cheers m'dear.

crumbling

Yup, its October. Winter and dreary days. Wake me up in may someone please?

savingwannabe

JD Salinger's Catcher in the Rye - A must.

Warning, you do go a bit crackers when you read it though it affects everyone.

Cheats version, am i allowed to have a link to Wikipedia? this looked the least complicated.

If you are able to jump onto Susan's thread (oh it was trolled we are moving to Notice to Newcomers at at 7pmish) hopefully George may appear. We can still have fun.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Catcher_in_the_Rye

ani_26

Thanks sailorswife. Beanielou is right. That is such a lovely post xx I'm still embarrassed and can't quite believe people say these things about me.

But they are wrong

I've just plunged into the depths of despair again, as i don't know who you can trust, and i've read you might have to pay money back after bankruptcy. I accept its been my stupidity and responsibility, but i'm struggling to accept i've lost my home and almost everything i've got , except my car, without which, i can't work. I've lost everything already, my soul, my being, and it still continues, never ending,and one simple thing sends me back to the place where i know theres only one answer to it all.

beanielou

I really wish I was better with words.
All I can say is its only money.
Dont worry about having to pay any more~if you havent got it then you cant pay it.Simple.
I know things are really tough at the mo but things will get better, it will just take time.
You have been through a lot of trauma & its very difficult to deal with it all on your own.
Under the circumstances I actually think that you are doing amazingly well.
You are greiving in a way for your past life & the one you thought you would have.
Your new life will be different & you are not sure how things will work out.
Its bound to be very scary.
You are a very strong person though(even though you dont feel it at the mo)& you can & will get through this.
I have every admiration for you.
Please be kind to yourself xx

savingwannabe

Beanie we are on NTN at 7pm tonight. Susan's thread has been closed due to some troll thing i think for 24 hours.

beanielou

Oh thanks SW.
May pop in for a wee while but am off tomorrow at the crack of dawn for a few days.

ani_26

I feel really !!!!!! today and it started as the day went on yesterday. I don't know if its the flu coming on. Everyone said on the night out, they'd had flu. Or maybe its just all the dust and muck from the attic. But my defences are low, and this is making me feel worse. No time to be ill. Got to carry on, somehow, Time ticking, i'm getting nowhere fast, and no one will do the clearance yet.

I've had enough of everything. Its not only me and my failings. Its everything. I hate the world i live in. Superficiality. Full of disingenuous people, people who don't really care about anyone or anything, except themselves. I've always been a giver, and so long as you keep on giving, people will take. But they've taken everything i've got, and no one genuinely cares enough, to give in return. In fact some people may take delight in others misfortune. I don't belong anymore. No one belongs anymore. Whatever happened to old values and tradition? They are all missing in soceity today. I've even been knocked over in the street, deliberately, several times, as people can't be bothered to walk a few inches out of their way. What has happened to people? I'm no better. I've borrowed money i could'nt pay back, still can't pay back, and still might have to pay back? I don't know. I've nearly killed my self trying to do it, i've nearly killed myself, because if it, and still, theres only one way out, in my eyes. At least other people here are trying to help themselves, before it gets too late.The advent of this soceity, brings the internet, with its own failures. Anyone can pretend to be anyone, on the internet. I never trust anyone, until i can see into their eyes.You can see a persons soul, in their eyes. The advent of being 'cool ' to wear ' shades '. I always ask people to take them off. Because you can't see the real person. I'm a raving luny.

With the advent of the internet, who reads books anymore? There are so many books in my attic. I can never throw a book away. I've had to sort through them. The odd first edition. Wise enough to keep those. What for? They are of sentimental value to me. I don't want to sell them, but then they are not mine to sell. They belong to the OR? One book 110 years old. 110 years old, BH, and an annual that belonged to my dad, signed and sent to him xmas 1923. Every single book signed, with a message inside. No one does that anymore. But its not been about cash in the attic, its about memories in the attic. But what good are memories when these people are no longer around to have them. They're meaningless. Its all meaningless. The smell too. Its a distinctive smell. I know what it is, and its on everything you touch. How do you ever get rid of that smell. Is it exclusive to this house? How come you can still smell it so strongly. Only i know why. If i take things with me, won't i also take the smell, the negativity, but i'm frightened it will be with me, wherever i go