Life after bankruptcy?

ani_26

miggy wrote: »

Great to hear your news especially from the hospital and on the money front! What did you do to them to make them pay? (Imagination working overtime here).
Now let's get the lurgy sorted.

Thanks miggy xx

What did i do to them to make them pay? Pleaded poverty, but not too much, as its not good form to let others know exactly how poor you are, ( well only when they can't see you, not when you work for them ) :eek:

I think i was very fortunate, as i found out there were others in my position, ie bills to pay, no money in bank account, not received pay, today, which i knew there would be. Ah well, got enough of my own financial strife to sort out. I and someone else offered to help, but of course, neither of us was in a position to lend the sort of money they needed either. And so it goes on....................... However, my pay was one month extra, outstanding, I think i had cause to chase them. But i had to go above someones head to do it though, and if, and when they find out, :eek:

ani_26

The whole world seems a better place today, knowing i've enough money to cover my imminent bills and the road tax, and the rent. Then i can start thinking about ni, and the rest. Lots of work come in, very long days, lots of money, ( hopefully) ,so its all systems go. I'm cream crackered thinking about it, in fact i'm cream crackered tonight, already. Never mind. Its the only way out of my financial nightmare.

Just need to shake off the lurgy. Its not going anywhere, fast. Anyone like to take it off my hands, for free? No charge

beanielou

Nah, no worries, will let ya keep the lurgy

MatyMoo

Sorry, I don't want to take the lurgy off you either

Have you been dancing around singing "i'm in the money"???

I know it is rightfully yours, and so so needed but I would have to have a little dance at my success :j:j:j Ask my colleagues, I regularly do it around the office and the money I collect isn't even mine :rotfl:

Maty
-x-

Aesop

Hope you are not working too hard Ani, and resting well in between the jobs.

miggy

It's a bit too quiet in here for my liking... you okay Ani?

miggy

Calling Ani...!

Hope you are all right? Even if not, please let us know. (You have a responsibility to your public, do you not? )

Meanwhile here is a (virtual) cup of Earl Grey and a big bunch of daffodils for you. :coffee: (Daffodils are outside in a bucket of water so they won't open too far).

ani_26

Hi Maty, Miggy, Aesop, Beanie, anyone else i've forgotten xx

:kisses3:


Thanks for the Earl Grey and the Daffs x


Today really is'nt a good day to post in my diary. I'm exhausted and despondeint, and now i've checked my bank account, in despair, weepy, and at one of those all time lows, again.

What is the point of life? Why did i start this stupid diary, because there is no life after bankruptcy. Well, not for me, any way. Despite all my efforts, i live to work, and work so i can afford to go to work. I'm at the point again where i seriously question continuing with life. There is no point in life.


Yes, all i've done these last few weeks, is work. Not a 9 to 5 job, with a weekend off, like most sensible/ normal people. I've been up at 4 in the morning and worked until 10pm at night,7 days a week, catching maybe a few hours sleep, and at the same time trying to keep on top of my accounts, so i'm reimbursed for my work. I used to be able to do this quite easily, only a few years ago, but now its taking its toll. I'm weepy today, and see little point in continuing to feel like this. Its just too much of a struggle. 14 months after bankruptcy, i seemingly still can't earn enough money to keep my head above water, let alone buy food to eat, live. I know there are others struggling on mse too, but how many continously get to that pont every month, when they don't even have any coppers left, even to buy a pint of milk. Theres struggling, and theres, well .........? £400 a month food budget? even £100 a month food budget? Thats a joke. I can't recall exactly how much i spent on food last month, maybe £30 - £40. I guess its still consistent with what i estimated, maybe £10 a week? I'm still managing to buy fresh fruit, and try and buy healthily, by using the Morriies 30p offers, and alda as ever. I'm definitely a master of getting by on next to nothing. I wonder if the great Martin Lewis himself has ever had to live so frugaly? I doubt it. Maybe theres no place for me on mse, because i'm in a whole different league of my own. Maybe most mse' rs, although still trying to pay debts and be ' mse ' , still have a life, in as much as they are able to have friends, socialise, have weekends away, have holidays, have evenings out, go to concerts, the theatre, the pub, restaurants, buy consumer products, clothes, whatever, spend what seems to me, a fortune on food. I've come to the conclusion, i don't belong anywhere, anymore.

So what did i do with the last pay i received? Well, it did'nt go very far, for sure. I spent £200 on the tyre and petrol. I've since had to buy some more petrol. The rest paid my direct debits, and i paid for my road tax. I made a misjudgement with the road tax, and paid up front for the whole year. £205. I did'nt want to be thinking about having to pay the rest in another 6 months time, plus i saved £25. But now i'm short for the rent, due today. Only £40 short, but £40 is £40, and it now leaves me with nothing as ever. When i say nothing, i mean, nothing. How many can comprehend that? Even i'm, what? shellshocked? no, maybe numb? because i'm used to it, by now. Its a demoralising feeling going out into the world, and to work, knowing you've got a £1 in your bank account, and nothing in your pocket. What happens if theres an emergency? Don't even think about it. I bought a travelcard yesterday,which means i can get to work for the next week, at least, but i must guard it with my life, because if i lose it, thats it. I can't get home. How insane is that? I am due some pay later this week, i'm fairly sure, but i don't know how much, and theres never any guarantee.

Its odd, only two weeks ago, i was trying to be positive, but its very difficult to be positive when you are in this situation. I started saving my £2 coins, but of course, i knew it would be short lived, and they've had to be spent towards the rent, now. I'd managed £20. But needs must. No saving for me. I also opened a new account, to try and start saving/ organising for emergencies. It was remarkably easy. It only took me 5 minutes, but then its only a basic account, and ,amazingly, you can open an account with an empty balance, So i've two bank accounts now. One with zero balance, and one with £1 ish balance. So what was the point of that, Huh?

Best start getting ready for the grindstone. My few hours off are nearly over, and i woke up at 5.am, too. Still got a few more mornings to be up at 4 am, but not every morning now. I'm so exhausted.

Do i feel any better, now i've offloaded to myself. I don't even know. I do know, when it gets this bad, its always easy to contemplate the easy way out. Because there does'nt seem any point to a life lived like this, and no one truly understands how or what, it makes you feel. Only i, know that.

Aesop

((((((((((((((Ani26))))))))))))))))))))

beanielou

Oh dear.I am sorry that things are not any better