Too much moneysaving?

LEJC

Shell....when I read his original post it would suggest he hasn't even got as far as buying the engagement ring yet...so I doubt hes had chance to ask his girlfriend her opinion on the wedding or indeed discover the costs of them...his signature at the bottom reads something about wanting to clear his debts first.....

shellsuit

LEJC wrote: »

Shell....when I read his original post it would suggest he hasn't even got as far as buying the engagement ring yet...so I doubt hes had chance to ask his girlfriend her opinion on the wedding or indeed discover the costs of them...his signature at the bottom reads something about wanting to clear his debts first.....

Yes, he said he was looking at proposing in 2011 but I think he knows exactly what he wants, so was wondering if him and his OH had spoken about what kind of wedding they'd like ~ some couples have little chats about the what if's and what they'd do if...etc, I know we did not long after we'd met 8 years ago lol!

chelbel1981

ampafc wrote: »

Been reading through this forum for a few days now, as I would love to be in a position to ask my partner to marry me at some point in 2011.

I envisage proposing with a nice diamond ring, and having a lovely day that the guests enjoy and always remember, and want my partner to have the best day ever. I'm sure that's the same for everybody...

Looking through some of the posts about people trying to do a wedding on a budget, though, isn't the budget so tight that it would maybe spoil the day a bit? Like not giving the guests much to drink, really cheap rings, not inviting a lot of people etc... Shouldn't you just put your wedding back a couple of years, save a bit more, so you can have a 'proper' day to remember?

chelbel1981 wrote: »

:mad: I'm going to calm down before I reply to this

And now it's my turn!

1. We got engaged and what OH thought was a nice diamond ring wasn't my cup of tea, he wanted me to have a big ring but I picked a small pretty ring.

2. We are going to have the best day ever!

3. We are not giving guest too much drink by personal preference! The rings we wanted were a grand a piece so we went for second best, does that mean they're no use??? NO
We aren't inviting Uncle Joe Cobbley and all because we want the people who mean something to us and the ones we are close with there! Is that wrong?

We have been together 13 years, we waited till our children were old enough to understand that marriage is about love and means something and it's not about objects, decorations and meaningless centrepieces that no one will remember.

Our budget was £3k max. we were fortunate enough to be given £2k

If that means our marriage isn't a 'proper', then I'll turn up as Mickey Mouse and get the vicar to sign the certificate as Donald duck

Lexxi

I've had my wedding savings 3 times this year, life got in the way and they've all gone, 3 times. I'm so pleased that I didn't decided to wait x amount of years so I could save up that extra 15k so my guests could have a free bar and day they couldn't remember all on me because everything that has happened this year has put me on my !!!! but because we want to get married and not just have a wedding then we are happy to compromise and do without some things or change what we would have had. It's not going to make my day any less legal or special.
Not spending the 'national average' on a wedding also means that I can be selective about my guests and choose not to invite people who would look at my handmade centrepieces or DIY buffet or asda wedding cake and tut or complain because I haven't spent what they think I should spend on MY special day

Emma1988

We arent spending the national average buy far, but are having a lovely day in a castle with 60 guests. Because tbh in my view, you only do it once and i want to spend my money on that! I understand where the OP is coming from. We dont have alot of money, but i think it just depends what people want to spend their money on. Some people save for a mortage, holiday, for us its a wedding

VK-2008

just read opening post but i think you can have a wedding for 500quid or 20k the day is what you make it
my day all in all came too 9.5k and we had 80 day guests, 200 in total for evening, we had hired band, lovely dress, 1 bridesmaid, best man, usher, flowergirl, page boy got great wedding package for photos fab meal, great venue.

we could easily of done it cheap or spent more but we were happy as we chose it

the day is what it means and symbolises to you both

we never had any money for a holiday but managed to get over 3k of money in gifts to booked a honeymoon after wedding

just think what parts of day are important no matter how big or small, fancy or not, dear or cheap your day is it will always be your day and will always be memorable

goodness my best memory of the day was something that never costed a thing it was me laughing having the giggles all the way through my vows

tod123

I go to a lot of weddings through my work, the best ones are the people in their 40's and 50's who get married in the register office on a Friday @ about 12pm , take 20 or so guests , then afterwards walk down to one of the really good local restaurants for lots of food and wine.

No hassle, no stress, limited expense and great fun.

The worst way to get married is a Church wedding imo , bride and groom are ALWAYS stressed out , its over in a flash , the guest list is full of people that "had to be invited" people are dreading making their speech , and the ceremony is just a dreadful bore.

hayleythedaisy

We got married 6 months after getting engaged, didn't spend loads and I had the best day ever. Had I waited 3 years to save up and spend alot more I doubt I would've because it would have bugged me how much we spent... I'd have been the crazy bride telling little Johny you WILL finish your dinner... it cost £XX!!!

Secondly, there was a really touching story on here of a couple who wanted to get married within a few weeks as the groom was terminally ill, they did not have the time nor the money to wait and have a lavish wedding, but they will still have the love and marriage. For me that brings it all back down to earth.

Spend what's comfortable for what you want and your level of showy-offish-ness (sorry can't think of the word I want).
(I couldn't imagine spending the price of a decent second hand car just so that a bunch of people I probably don't get a Christmas card from can drink all night on me!)

Either way, I hope everything works out for you, and she likes her ring (no matter what the price...) and you have a great day and an even better life together.

Tinka21

The other year I went to 2 wedding's close to each other. The first was my cousin who had a church do with wedding breakfast and evening buffet etc the full works and it was totally boring and everything about it seemed false and put on, not because of how they decided to have their wedding day but because it didn't suit the couple. They didn't look in love and there was no romanace at all, they didn't even kiss at the alter they turned and took a bow and then we had to applaud them like they had just put on a show! lol

The second was my friends who got married in reg office and then back to a family members house for photo's and buffet and it was lovely, everyone was laughing and had a good time and the couple really enjoyed just having everyone together.

I have only got a small budget of around £1500 but I want something relaxed so everyone can enjoy themselves. I have been with OH for 7 years and we have 2 kids together so I'm not fussed about a big lavish affair as it doesn't reflect who we are as a couple.

frannyann

tod123 wrote: »

I go to a lot of weddings through my work, the best ones are the people in their 40's and 50's who get married in the register office on a Friday @ about 12pm , take 20 or so guests , then afterwards walk down to one of the really good local restaurants for lots of food and wine.

No hassle, no stress, limited expense and great fun.

The worst way to get married is a Church wedding imo , bride and groom are ALWAYS stressed out , its over in a flash , the guest list is full of people that "had to be invited" people are dreading making their speech , and the ceremony is just a dreadful bore.

Oh goodo, mines going to be fab in that case :T