Too much moneysaving?

frannyann

Our budget is £3.4K, and we have achieved a lot with that amount, purely by haggling prices and hunting around for the 'best price' for things. This board has been really helpful, I had planned on spending £100 on flowers, but due to helpful people here I was able to source them for £40! Likewise I had a budget of £500 for a dress but haggled and got one I loved for £300. With the venue we agreed to a high per person rate, which give people plenty of food and drink but made sure we got room hire and extras thrown in for free. So its not about how much it costs but how well you present it

shellsuit

ampafc wrote: »

Been reading through this forum for a few days now, as I would love to be in a position to ask my partner to marry me at some point in 2011.

I envisage proposing with a nice diamond ring, and having a lovely day that the guests enjoy and always remember, and want my partner to have the best day ever. I'm sure that's the same for everybody...

Looking through some of the posts about people trying to do a wedding on a budget, though, isn't the budget so tight that it would maybe spoil the day a bit? Like not giving the guests much to drink, really cheap rings, not inviting a lot of people etc... Shouldn't you just put your wedding back a couple of years, save a bit more, so you can have a 'proper' day to remember?

No.

I know someone who had a horse and carriage, he came in a helicopter, they had a massive wedding breakfast, everyone was suited and booted, big posh venue for the reception ~ they split within 12 months, but they'd been together before the wedding for 9 years!

The only thing that matters is that the couple are marrying for the right reasons and are not getting married just to have a wedding!

chelbel1981

ampafc wrote: »

Been reading through this forum for a few days now, as I would love to be in a position to ask my partner to marry me at some point in 2011.

I envisage proposing with a nice diamond ring, and having a lovely day that the guests enjoy and always remember, and want my partner to have the best day ever. I'm sure that's the same for everybody...

Looking through some of the posts about people trying to do a wedding on a budget, though, isn't the budget so tight that it would maybe spoil the day a bit? Like not giving the guests much to drink, really cheap rings, not inviting a lot of people etc... Shouldn't you just put your wedding back a couple of years, save a bit more, so you can have a 'proper' day to remember?

:mad: I'm going to calm down before I reply to this

Birdie85

I really don't think you're in the right place to be making such posts! We're all about the money saving here, and there have been some wonderful weddings had by our brides that don't look at all 'ruined' by their smaller than average budgets!

My OH and I had a choice: get married next year on a £4k budget or wait to save up 3 times that amount which would take us years. Considering we want to start a family in 3 years and enjoy some 'married time' before we do, that isn't an option, and we're more than happy with our choice. It's about getting married, not having a huge 'keeping up with the Joneses' day. Yes, I want a wedding that'll be enjoyable and memorable but it isn't the free booze, or the flowers or the helicopter that makes it so, it's the people who are there to share it with you who make it a great day.

Saying that, if I had a spare £20k lying around I'd quite happily spend it on a massive wedding.

mimosaurus

I think it totally depends on what you want, and I'm not sure why people are insulted by the OP who clearly wants something different. If the big dream day if your or your partners wish then of course saving up for a million years to pay for it is really the only option! I know for me, I wouldn't even consider the big dream princess wedding, I hate all that crap and would happily forego all tradition in my wedding - having my wedding on a budget is not killing my dreams, it's making it more 'me' because I'm a terrible skinflint anyway. Some people just aren't like me - I cringe at the thought of spending even £5k on a wedding, let alone £20k. But it's totally personal choice.

We didn't want to wait anymore. We want to make a promise to each other and to embark on a new journey as a married couple. But we're not losing out on anything to do so. If I was the sort of person who wanted the big wedding, I think I would be happy to wait and save for it, but I'm not, and even the idea of planning for a long time drives me mad.

Someone I have the misfortune of knowing was married a few years ago at a big £20k wedding. They talked all day about how much it cost and who paid for what, and now she's still £10k in debt and says she can't remember any of it. She spent the whole day stamping her feet and shouting at people. Though to be honest, that's what she does most of the time, so it's only right that she acts the same on her wedding day

foreign_correspondent

mellymeep wrote: »

The more money spent does not correlate with having an enjoyable and memorable day in my opinion. I'm going to remember our day for the rest of my life and spent a fraction of what is reported as the "average" cost of a wedding. I saved money in many areas where others would splash out and I don't think I compromised at all.

It is of course all down to personal opinions, a wedding is obviously a day entirely dedicated to the couple and what they want.

I agree - I'm not really into weddings, however the nicest one I've ever attended was when two friends got married in the final year at university ( they were both in their late 20s at the time) and they really had no spare cash. They both wore colurful clothes, and the bride had flowers in her hair. After the registry office they had a buffet and garden party at home.

It was lovely, all the food had been made by friends, another friend did the music, the sun was shining, and it was all that was needed... it still felt very much like a wedding, and all the elderly relatives had a sherry and a dance with the student friends..! It was very celebratory, and very relaxed and comfortable. it also felt far more personal than some of the very formal ceremonies I've been to - of course it wouldn't be for everyone, but it suited them - and it's a day I will always remember fondly.

NiceGuyEddie_2

At the end of your days, no sane person is going to look back and think 'I wish I'd spent more money on my wedding' but sadly plenty will think 'I wish I'd spent more time on my marriage'.

Quite aside from the issue of the wedding being the commencement of your marriage rather than the main event itself, from a guests point of view there is little correlation between the level of money spent and the level of enjoyment. Your guests are there to help you celebrate your relationship and provided they're warm, dry, fed and watered they shouldn't mind about anything else - if they do, I'm not entirely sure why they're being invited?

When a couple and their guests reflect on the wedding day itself, which is it more important to remember - what the flowers looked like or the couple's love and commitment?

shellsuit

ampafc wrote: »

Wow - I was just giving my opinion/starting a debate. No need to judge I said i want my partner to have a day she will always remember, and for our guests to have a great time.

I guess if I started this debate on a wedding forum then I would have had different replies - of course most people on here are trying to save a lot of money/work to a tighter budget.

Interesting to hear the replies though.

No need to judge? :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:


Don't you think we all want a day to remember and for our guests to have a good time?

If my guests were only worried about what we were going to supply, I wouldn't want them to come!

For some people, to have a big lavish wedding could take them about 20 years or more to save up for ~ is it worth wasting all that time when you can legally be married for a couple of hundred quid?

Depends what's more important to the couple really doesn't it?

ampafc

The posts about certain couples spending massive amounts of money on their wedding - and then splitting up - are just nonsense. A lot of people that have cheap weddings end up splitting up as well, but of course no one on here wants to mention that Probably because they see that as irrelevant - just as irrrelevant as giving examples of those who spend a fortune then split up. The cost of the wedding has nothing to do with whether or not that couple stays together, so i'll just ignore this type of comment.

Some of you seem a bit offended by my original post - I was just giving an opinion. Please read it again and you will see that.

ampafc

tamarto wrote: »

No need to judge? No i know, not very nice is it.

I'm not so sure you would have actually, i'd say appearing on any forum and telling people they are doing it wrong, not making enough effort etc etc would meet with harsher replies than you've had here.

Oh and you don't need to spend ££££££ for people to enjoy themselves or to have a memorable day.

I haven't told anyone to do anything. Please can you read the original post again?