Money Moral Dilemma: How much board should I charge?

digitig

MSE_Archna wrote: »

She’s now earning over £200 a week and we’ve asked her to pay £30 a week towards board, so she can learn the value of money. She thinks it isn’t fair and says she’ll only pay £20. Should we make her pay up?

Congratulations to her. She not only has an idea of the value of money, but understands the importance of negotiating. She's going to be a real MSE soon. But for now it's time for her to learn that negotiating doesn't always work, and that you can hold your position.

ShaneUK

At £30 week - can I move in please!!

When I got my first job, I was "charged" half of whatever I earned. I didn't like the idea, but i didn't have a choice - other than "move out"!

avaface

Ive never understood why it is until your 18 your home is considered just that your 'Home',but once you reach a magic point ie left uni or reach 18,you are suddenly made to feel like a lodger. I agree that she should be paying money towards the house and i agree that £30 is more than fair but i think its the confrontational way that some parents approach the subject that suddenly makes it into a full out battle of wills. I gave my parents £50 a week when i started working full time,there mortgage had already been paid off so i was paying towards the council tax,water,utilities and food. My father only sat me down and explained all the bills to me when i asked him to though, but he did say that he would never have expected me to pay towards the mortgage, as they had chosen the house long before we came along, they had never factored our money going towards mortgage bills when they took the mortgage out in the first place and they wouldn't be paying any extra because we were there. I would say sit her down and talk to her like she's your daughter and not suddenly a leach that you've found is stuck to your skin,go through your bills with her. She could already be saving towards a deposit for a house for all any of us know on here and thats why even that £10 difference a week is something she doesn't want to pay or yes it could be she's just a spoiled brat. None of us really know but don't make her feel like a stranger in her own home,its just not worth it!

ms_piggy

I had to pay 1/3 of my wages to my parents towards housekeeping. I really begrudged it and felt it was unfair as they didn't need the money.

HOWEVER, I now really appreciate what they did as it taught me the value of money and that life isn't always a bed of roses.

My advice would be to stick to your guns, she will thank you in the long run

MDE

irritable wrote: »

My son started work earlier this year. Having left college I had to start paying Council tax for him. So I had the 'what to charge' dilemma.
In the end I settled on taking one week's wages after tax, leaving the rest of the months earnings for him to keep. By using that formula I reckon that I can reasonably increase his contribution to the family budget in line with his rising income.
Certainly £30 from £200 is an entirely reasonable amount and Miss-Stroppy needs to wise-up and pay with a smile on her face.

The extra cost to you was the difference in council tax- which I would guess to mean that you lost the 25% single person discount as otherwise the number of people in the house is irrespective. This interests me as later you talk about the family budget which makes me think that others are also involved.

Was one weeks wages per month for 12 months equal to the difference in council tax, or did you make anything additional from this?

Justamum

I was paying more than that when I started work nearly 30 years ago! Work out all bills, divide by three and make her pay a third share. £30 would barely cover her food, never mind anything else. If she complains make her get her own flat.

pennypinchUK

Tell her she can pay £20 if she can find somewhere else that will only charge £20 a week. She'll come running back grateful you're only asking for £30 a week.

MDE

avaface wrote: »

Ive never understood why it is until your 18 your home is considered just that your 'Home',but once you reach a magic point ie left uni or reach 18,you are suddenly made to feel like a lodger.

This is my point, and all these comments, things like "Pay up or ship out" and "If she doesn't like it she can find somewhere else" really do shock me and it worries me the way that some people appear to view their children as income sources!

Prime example, just been posted whilst I was writing this.

If she complains make her get her own flat.

Would you really, honestly kick your children or partners children out??

Cloudane

Sit down and calculate with her how much it'd cost to live on her own, or to be fair, how much it costs to run your household (divided by the number of people within it) and I don't think she'll find £30 quite so unreasonable after that :rotfl:

I pay mine £40 and feel very lucky (10x6' bedroom and messy house notwithstanding!). £30 is a steal. £20 is taking the p155!

Kicking her out should probably be a last resort though, for if she continues to be so ungrateful after listening to the reasoning and seeing the calculations (Likely after years of effort rather than minutes!)

gaily

MDE wrote: »

Mobile, Gym and Clothes all free now then? Also I would assume some cost of travelling to and from work- car, bus or train.

I'm assuming that previously she didn't have a job, so was living on the £30 from Dad, now has £200 weekly.

I didn't factor the traveling to and from work, but these are decisions she has to make - does she wear a full suit, or skirt and top, does she go to Armani or Primark, Train or Bike, Lunch at the canteen or make your own sandwiches - all decisions we make based on our financial situations.

If she could afford the gym and mobile before, then by earning money, she should surely be better off. It's hard starting work, but she's still far better off financially by staying at home, £30 weekly may barely cover a young person's food - what would she do if she couldn't live at home, she'd have to forego the luxury of the mobile and gym etc.

I wish I could afford the gym....... I'm on my bike, and have a good wage too.