Weekly Flylady Thread 16th August 2010

greenbee

gratefulforhelp wrote: »

Well... for him, he needs to behave with absolute integrity and maintain the moral high ground at all times. It the only way to go and otherwise, eventually, it will weaken or destroy his relationship with his kids. This is in terms of financial matters and contact which must always be kept separate. He needs to turn up when he says he will and do what he says he will.

Then no-one will christen him KH!!

Outspoken is good... for everyone's sake he needs to get this right. He has been trying to use sessions with relate to get communication working and has been making some progress, but not on contact with the kids. He's now emailed stating that as arrangements would normally be alternate weekends, half of each holiday and half term, and alternate public holidays like christmas he wants to get things settled for the benefit of the kids - and as she hasn't been communicating agreed arrangements to the boys, he's copied them in with the weekends he's proposed explaining that he's gone through his work diary for the next three months and worked it all out around his travel commitments (he's also being very clear at work that weekends are now a no-go area, which is a big change for him). I'm hoping that the next couple of weeks of 1-2-1 time with them will help him to get his relationship with them on track, and at least make them aware that they can still call and email him anytime, and that it is their choice as to whether/when they see him, but that he's putting time aside for them

gratefulforhelp wrote: »

For you, be prepared for a fair bit of heartache, aggro and irritation. And thrash out early days with him whether you are forgoing your right to children just because he already has some (or not).

God I'm outspoken. Sorry GB.

Outspoken is good... the heartache, aggro and irritation have already started (knowing what so many of you put up with, I find it unforgiveable that his ex is using the kids to try to control him) and the other matter has already been discussed...

gratefulforhelp wrote: »

Mrs C its def worse for you. I'm just worried about my bottom set year 11s who I love dearly but are not setting the academic world on fire. I would like to see them ace their target grades though and flip two fingers to their detractors!!

As serena says, why should they be setting the academic world on fire? It would be great if they could do well and boost their confidence, but academic excellence is not always either necessary or desirable. Being a nice person is more important.

oh... and I've just got the all clear from my trip to the clinic thought you'd all like to know!

Had a lie in this morning... so no work or flying done. It's a miserable day... wish I could go back to bed, but there are things that need doing.

pigpen

serena wrote: »

pigpen - well, I didn't think they'd be anything you haven't tried already! She's still very newly hatched, so I guess she just needs a bit more time to settle!

We went and laid on the bed for a feed and a cuddle and she went off almost straight away! I think she had just been handled a bit much by people she doesn't know (not me, OH or DD1) so got a bit fidgetty. she is seeming much more settled today.. until we have to go be weighed later.. She is actually looking at people now which is nice it is like talking to someone who is switched on now..

Valli

greenbee wrote: »

I'm hoping that the next couple of weeks of 1-2-1 time with them will help him to get his relationship with them on track, and at least make them aware that they can still call and email him anytime, and that it is their choice as to whether/when they see him, but that he's putting time aside for them:T:T



oh... and I've just got the all clear from my trip to the clinic thought you'd all like to know!:cool: phew!

well done him...have to say my ex has settled recently...I now longer have to 'work myself up' to calll him; he accepts the kids don't always want to see him and can be relied upon to back me up on occasion when necessary. Took him a long time to get to this. Mind you I have never manipulated them against him, and I talk about him to kids when necessary, reminding them of things we did. Did tell DD her dad was NOT as good as decorating as she is though...he's impatient and doesn't put the prep in.
One of my B-I-Ls said that it had taken him a LONG time to get over me (well of course it did - I was like Gillette really :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:somwhat ironic given our surname:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:)

(Puzzled? - Gilette - the best a man can get:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:)

(wanders back into DS's room sneezing and attempting to get big head through doorway;))

invisiblecabbage

HHC at 11.30 anyone?

mummyslittleboy

greenbee wrote: »

I don't want the kids to be confused as to why he left. Or his ex for that matter.

I don't blame you greenbee I had this problem met XH 6 months after he split up from his ex met his boys 4 months later, next thing his ex is telling them that I was the cause of them breaking up I was not nasty enough to tell the boys the real reason for them breaking up so to this day they think it was me that split there parents up.

Dw emptied,beds made, WM on got friend coming for the day with her girls haven't seen her for almost a year so am really looking forward to seeing them catch you all later.

pigpen

Valli wrote: »

(Puzzled? - Gilette - the best a man can get:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:)

Your surname is Bic??? lol

Valli

invisiblecabbage wrote: »

HHC at 11.30 anyone?

yup! I'm in...

pigpen wrote: »

Your surname is Bic??? lol

naww


Venus

Valli

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Money_saving_Diva_2

Morning all,

Have only read a little so still not up to date with everyone and I don't have a list so am posting illegally!:p

Toots -

My Godson helped me in the garden again yesterday and he harvested some dwarf green beans, tomatoes, radish and lots of blackberries. Plus peppers. Well. I thought they were peppers, the label had gone missing from the pot and they were small but pepper shaped so collected about 20, and decided to slice them and freeze them. All was going well til I scratched my nose and realised there was a slight burning sensation and when I touched my tongue to a slice realised they were in fact really hot (and large) chilli peppers!! Very grateful to have worked that out as next time I was cooking, throwing a handful of them in would have ruined the meal and quite blown our heads off! Have dried them off and chopped them and have plenty of dried chilli 'flakes' now.

Thank you to everyone who pm-ed me, both when I was away and since I posted two days ago, I was really touched. Life threw me a few nasty curveballs, hence my absence, but I will try to be back now.

Love to all and hope everyone has a good day. With love, light and

Diva.x

Mum_on_a_mission_2

last HHC over-ran

dinner located in the freezer
tubs in freezer restacked & lids put back on - seemed to have had an earthquake in their - now have very cold hands!
meals planned for whilst we have guests
mental shopping list compiled
blueberry muffins made and in the oven
freegle pickups agreed

Right - runs to join the next HHC

Moam