Family vs The Law: eep, what should I do?

Plans_all_plans

No WAY would I do this for my sister. YOU are the one who will end up in a mess cos the way your sister is carrying on means she'll dump you in it if she has to. She'll deny all knowledge of any of this and put it all on you when poeple start chasing her.

paddy's_mum

But at least she'll have the money to come visit her much loved sister in prison!

Seriously? What has led her to think that you're willing to be made a CRIMINAL on her say-so? You do realise that what she is proposing is - quite simply - stealing, don't you?

Mojisola

Badger_Lady wrote: »

Umm... but she's not. She's just bumming around..? Her lifestyle, her choice. As long as it doesn't put me in prison :eek:

But she isn't. She's already left her ex to pay off her debt of £4000 and now she's asking you to lie for her and to join her in a fraud scam!

It's very hard when relatives put you in positions like this but, unless you're happy to end up in court, you need to say no to her.

Badger_Lady

Thanks guys. Peachyprice - you make a very good point indeed, I hadn't thought of the possibility that it could look like I'm taking a loan out in her name.

Although I sincerely doubt that she would dump me in it (she'd readily dump other people in it but would draw the line at her own sister), the potential repercussions are huge.

The landline number (which she has already given them) is actually my direct dial at the office, so easy to explain to a debt collection agency that they can't use it to reach my sister. However, what if they then tried to take action at my place of employment? That does not look good...

LilacPixie

BL just don't do it, they phone say no one of that name is in that building and they have called the offices of 'company name' so must have wrong number. They will think number has been mistyped or even cancel the application and then you just say there has been no call. My office has a direct dial number to get only me but if i am in a meeting and the phone is ringing alot one of the admin staff tend to pick it up for me and take a message, fetch me if urgent. For all your sis knows your office may be the same so when someone calls asking for tallula bluemoon and no one of that name is there they your colleague would naturally say oh sorry no one called tallula bluemoon works here, have you got the right number?? this is the number for partner & partner solicitors.

Lara44

I think she's sort of dumped you in it already! I wouldn't worry about her being angry - I would be livid with her for considering this...

Shame they sold the house in negative equity, surely there were other options. I also would investigate this fall from grace and secrecy. It sounds like she is hiding something. Don't be afraid of doing what she thinks is wrong in the short term but actually right in the long term. Sounds like you need to reconnect with her on her return.

Badger_Lady

So what do I do about sis stuck in a foreign country with no money?

I could send her some without her knowing... I've got her bank details from June, although if she's doing this a lot perhaps they'll have changed..? Do I take the risk putting money I can't afford to lose into a machine that might not even put it in her account?

I can't just leave her stranded and starving abroad - that's not what families are for.

paddy's_mum

Badger Lady - I don't wish to be offensive but whatever makes you believe that she wouldn't dump you in it? Can't you see that she already has!!! They've got your number. She has already involved you in the beginnings of her scheme. That's not love nor loyalty, on the part of either of you.

I cannot begin to imagine any member of my family having the sheer audacity to ask me to help them steal. I think that you might be wise to be questioning yourself about what your sister sees in your character that makes her so sure that not only will you not blow the whistle but that you might be easily persuaded to go along with it.

Sorry to be sounding such a moralistic prude but why aren't you refusing any part of this scheme on priniciple, not just because you might get traced and caught? :eek:

Badger_Lady

LaraHoust wrote: »

Shame they sold the house in negative equity, surely there were other options.

They'd already had the house on the market before splitting up... they planned to buy a larger place with a granny annexe in conjunction with fiance's mother. I think this was one of the things that tipped her over the edge.

They bought the newbuild house in late 2007 with a 125% mortgage - the music would have to be faced at some point :eek:

Badger_Lady

paddy's_mum wrote: »

I cannot begin to imagine any member of my family having the sheer audacity to ask me to help them steal. I think that you might be wise to be questioning yourself about what your sister sees in your character that makes her so sure that not only will you not blow the whistle but that you might be easily persuaded to go along with it.

Frankly I think she's just underestimated my intelligence... she hasn't said anything to me about stealing. As far as she's concerned, she's just told me what she needs to and not involved me with anything criminal or immoral.

She told me about the loan company because I asked... and I'd be more than happy to 'pretend to be her' for an application. We've accessed eachother's bank accounts before, used eachothers passports as photo ID - it's very handy having a double out there, and we trust eachother implicitly. We always, always have the other person's permission before pretending to be them, so there's no harm in it.

On the phone, she told me "it's a really cheap APR". I'm sure she only said that to reassure me of its legitimacy. But I'm not that stupid... I know the details she sent me are out of date and I can see through to exactly what she's planning. She's always been a little casual with the truth when it comes to "faceless organisations". She got her first job with an incredibly fragrant CV - got away with it too. And she had credit cards at age 15, simply through a little date-of-birth manipulation.

I don't think she sees it as stealing... it's loopholes that the company are silly enough to leave open. It's moneysaving.