am i being mean

LilacPixie

Not being mean.

MY OH's parents live a bit away from us and we were going to go stay with them for a few nights enroute to family further south but they decided that they felt uncompftable with us sharing a room so wanted me and kids to share his old room and him to bunk in with his older brother. That was a resounding no

The_Next_Verse

I am again voting for not being mean

Mainly on the grounds of having younger children in the house... hat would be a definite no no for me!

gratefulforhelp_2

Not mean. Contraception contraception contraception.

sammyjammy

I lived with a guy between the ages of 22-24 and his parents lived a couple of hundred miles away. When we went to stay with them we had to sleep in seperate rooms, they would go to owrk in the morning and he wouldn't even let us have a "quickie" in thier house!

Owain_Moneysaver

claretmatt wrote: »

Do you buy the condoms or do you make your son pay for them?

This is MSE - they're available free on the NHS.

Guinea_2

I have been with my husband for 11 years now. :kisses2:We have lived together for five years and been married for three. In the six years that we lived at our respective parents' houses my husband never stayed at my house and I only stayed at his house when I told them I was staying at a friends house.:eek: His parents were much more laid back than mine. I was 20 when we started going out and he was 18 so we weren't really young. Even when we moved in together I think that my Mum still believed that I was a v*rgin! :AShe stopped believing that when we had a baby...I think!!:D

jellybaby21

It's not a question of 'being mean' it's a question for what is best all round. Although you might feel they are still kids at sixteen, when you are that age you have hormones flying around everywhere and sex on the brain. If teenagers want to have sex they will. I was brought up always allowed boyfriends to stay over etc, my parents much prefered me being safe than lying to them. As for them frequently splitting up, lots of adults split up and get back together all the time too. Re the aspergers, the GF and your son will just have to get used to the awkward questions and accept his sibling for the way he is. My mum waltzed into my bedroom when I was 16 after my boyfriend and i had been together a month and produced a packet of condoms and some KY jelly!!!! My mum has even come to GUM clinics with me for check ups. I was brought up to respect safe sex and made my OH get a full sexual health check up (I did too) when we first got together. I think the GF going on the pill is a really good idea though as condoms really can split purely accidentally. When you are young and in love or lust or both sleeping together whether or not you are having sex is such a lovely experience. Hope my ramblings help!

January20

sharkeybabe wrote: »

Not at all. It is your house so your room. Just make sure that you have discussed all the appropriate contraception with your son. Do you know the GF's parents? If you are uncomfortable about them sharing a room at her house could you maybe speak to her parents? They may not even know that they are sleeping in the same room.

Equally, their house - their rules. The OP has no right to interfere with what they allow/ don't allow there.

minerva_windsong

Not being mean at all - I would never have been allowed to have a boy stay in my room when I was 16. In fact, I'm 22 and my boyfriend is 23, we've been together for three years, and he still has to sleep on the sofa when he stays at our house (I still live with my parents).

As others have said, it's your house and your rules.

TUS

I don't think you are being mean, but I'm shocked at some of the age "limits" people have in place. In their 20s???

It entirely depends on how mature they are for their age IMO. My parents are quite liberal and allowed it at 17 ... but then I didn't have a serious relationship before I was 17 to test that.

If my child was mature, we had discussed contraception and I thought the relationship was serious ... I would allow it at 16. If you are feeling uncomfortable its likely one of those three factors isn't quite right.