Uncle taken money........

emsywoo123

Hi I'll try to keep this brief

Had 2 grandparents, grandma passed away 2 years ago.
3 offspring left, my mum and her 2 brothers. All in their fifties.

My mum lives some distance away, and eldest of the 2 brothers still works full time, so youngest offers to look in on grandad as and when required, pick up bits of shopping etc.

This youngest brother is on full disability benefits as he had cancer some years ago that left permanent damage, and has now had a double heart lung bypass (approx 10-15 years ago)

It has come to light in the last week that this brother (my uncle) has taken approximately £80K from my granddad over the last 2 years, from his pension, his savings, my grans savings and the inheritance she had left for the 7 grandchildren.

He left my granddad the barest minimum-value food, just bread and milk, 2nd hand worn out clothes. This was obviously hidden when mum/other brother visited.

My grandad now has about £300 left. My parents and mum's other bro have bought him all he needs and stocked him up, he is now 92.

Grandad has said he did not realise quite what had happened, but will not do anything as youngest son is apple of his eye. He says if anyone says anything he will tell police he gave him permission.

any idea what happens now? the money was earmarked for a nursing home for him to have the best care is his latter years.

N.B. Mum and other bro have now seen the bank statements-spent mostly on William Hill, jewellers, flights and cash withdrawals. the card has now been removed from this younger bro and cancelled!

Browntoa

not much you can do without involving the police and without his co-operation you would need to prove that at 92 he had not been able to manage his affairs

brians_daughter

if your grandad has given the money then there is nothing you can do, however if grandad didnt know what was going on then it is a matter for the police. However, this will need to come from grandad, your mum and uncle could report it but i would imagine as its grandads money if he doesnt wish to press charges (you do say he is the apple of his eye) then there is little that can be done if grandad is of sound mind etc.

TBh it doesnt sound like their is any chance of getting the £s back, or is there?

If he isnt feeding grandad correctly - and bread and milk isnt correct then isnt this abuse of some kind? does grandad realise this, does he want his son to continue to care for him if he is being treated this way?


I must add this is so sad when someone would take money from anyone - esp elderly parents

emsywoo123

Browntoa wrote: »

not much you can do without involving the police and without his co-operation you would need to prove that at 92 he had not been able to manage his affairs

I believe the bank are keen to involve the police now this has all come to light. Granddad still has his full faculties mentally.

It just seems so injust.

I suggested calling DWP regarding non-declared income on benefits, but my mum and uncle are not sure they would take much notice.

RAS

I doubt if there is much you can do about what has gone if grandfather is going to lie to cover up.

As a family what you need to do now is prevent uncle taking anything else. That means you need to try and get grandfather to agree that your other uncle and mum deal with his finances and they explain what has happened to bank etc to stop the thieving uncle accessing his accounts.

Is there any chance that a medical assessment of granddad would find that he was not fully capable?

Just read the updates.

is there any chance that if questioned by the police, uncle might admmit what he has done?

emsywoo123

brians_daughter wrote: »

if your grandad has given the money then there is nothing you can do, however if grandad didnt know what was going on then it is a matter for the police. However, this will need to come from grandad, your mum and uncle could report it but i would imagine as its grandads money if he doesnt wish to press charges (you do say he is the apple of his eye) then there is little that can be done if grandad is of sound mind etc.

Grandad did not know, but will not admit this formally, as he is concerned that his youngest would get into trouble. If it was not so sad it would be funny.

TBh it doesnt sound like their is any chance of getting the £s back, or is there?

No, youngest bro has blown it

If he isnt feeding grandad correctly - and bread and milk isnt correct then isnt this abuse of some kind? does grandad realise this, does he want his son to continue to care for him if he is being treated this way?


I must add this is so sad when someone would take money from anyone - esp elderly parents

..........

emsywoo123

RAS wrote: »

I doubt if there is much you can do about what has gone if grandfather is going to lie to cover up.

As a family what you need to do now is prevent uncle taking anything else. That means you need to try and get grandfather to agree that your other uncle and mum deal with his finances and they explain what has happened to bank etc to stop the thieving uncle accessing his accounts.

This has happened this weekend, card was removed, cancelled etc end of last week by bro, mum travelled up there this weekend to see it all for herself.

Is there any chance that a medical assessment of granddad would find that he was not fullyt capable?

My mum has tried to get home help etc for him, which was approved, but he sent them away and eventually would not let them in, as he "seemed" to be coping.

He seems, in conversation, to be fully compus mentus.

It must be mentioned, that the £80K is a conservative estimate, and there is likely to be considerably more (upto £120K)

hitchins

This happened with my nan who has alzheimers (sp?). One of her daughters had taken approximately £10,000 over a period of time, we had no definite proof, although we knew, couldn't physically prove it to police etc. My parents took over my nan's financial affairs (power of attorney) and informed Social Services, who took the matter very seriously and said that they would involve the police if any more vanished, funnily enough, when said Aunt was informed, no more money disappeared.

It is disgraceful and unbeleivable that people can do this to their parents, it is elder abuse. :mad: And in your case Emsy, not sure what you'd do if grandad is going to deny it.

RAS

My mother often seemed fully compos mentis when talking to people - what I called "snowing them" but actually scored very low in memory tests.

Can you ask his doctor to get him and urgent assessment.

By the way some types of dementia impact on simple recall and other destroy the executive function. My mother could tell you precisely what her dietary requirement were (her words) then sit and fail to eat or drink for several days.

JaneRN

I would still report it to the police and / or social workers. This sounds like a vunerable adult issue. Your uncle had access to his fathers finances because he is elderly and needs some help with his daily living. Your uncle is guilty and sometimes if there is a vunerable adult issue they can prosecute anyway. I knew of a similar case that didn't fully come to light until after the elderly relative died. There was a prosecution and a jail sentence for one ?two of the culprits - a daughter and grand daughter of the deceased.

NAR

If your gfather does need to go into nursing care, say within the next 2 years, and his bank statements are examined to check his financial status will queries not arise about deliberate deprivation of assets?