Ladies & Gentlemen, please fasten your seatbelts ...

dangers

Great big hugs benben.

B****y h**l to what he has put you through. For all my imagination, I never dreamt it was anything like this. I had wondered why the csa now had to be involved - I can see why now. I think my feelings are just echoed by what others have said.

Take care of yourself and ds
Lucy

benbenandme

KM, no the solicitor is the duty one who was at the police station ... and the biggest irony of them all .... do you all remember ds's best friend who's dad walked out the week before xmas?? Well he's my solicitor :eek: :rotfl:
I do have lots of people in rl I can talk to and they've been brilliant too, but today I've just had a bad day, partly cos its almost ds birthday and that always makes me emotional, partlycos of the envelopes from his mum but mainly though cos of him being at his dads this weekend. I utterly hate having to let him go there still :mad:

benbenandme

Yep, solicitor advised me to involve csa now, but assuming he loses his job (can't see how he won't) then the maintenace will stop altogether

EllieMarie

benbenandme wrote: »

KM, no the solicitor is the duty one who was at the police station ... and the biggest irony of them all .... do you all remember ds's best friend who's dad walked out the week before xmas?? Well he's my solicitor :eek: :rotfl:
I do have lots of people in rl I can talk to and they've been brilliant too, but today I've just had a bad day, partly cos its almost ds birthday and that always makes me emotional, partlycos of the envelopes from his mum but mainly though cos of him being at his dads this weekend. I utterly hate having to let him go there still :mad:

Because of what has happened do you have to continue to let DS go to his Dads or would this cause additional issues for you if stopped contact?

Keeping_Motivated

How weird about your solicitor...that is irony!

After ex dragging you into this I cannot believe he had the nerve to quibble the CSA amount the other week!!....actually maybe I can believe it!!

benbenandme

Apparently when he was arrested he could have explained that the payments to me were for child maintenace but chose to say nothing instead, hence why they had to come and get me :mad: :mad:

dangers

KM - I quite agree with you about the money query. Some people are quite strange!!!
Benben - why did he not explain it???? Do you have cause to speak to him at all, apart from when ds goes to and from his?
If I've read it correctly in the past, I think you meet somewhere in between where you live. I hope you don't do that for him now - make him come all the way to you.

benbenandme

I have asked several people and the general consensus seems to be that as he has done nothing that would put ds at risk then I can't stop him having access. Even if he had done something risky to children then he could still have supervised access :eek: :eek:

I wish I could do something about it, struggling to think of a much worse role-model for my baby but, if it goes the way my solicitor is thinking then I may get some peace from him for a while

Keeping_Motivated

benben does DS like going to his dads?

benbenandme

KM and Dangers, am guessing he needs to start watching his pennies now he has a mortgage to pay for on his new house after all