Ladies & Gentlemen, please fasten your seatbelts ...

benbenandme

Lol Hypno, I'm in awe of your shredding and running

Dinner was nice, mum and dad came along too. Bed is now made and I can't wait to dive into it, clean sheets are just scrummy

Time now for mooching on here before a fairly early night me thinks.

benbenandme

Back from the car boot with £30 profit, am pleased with that as last time I thought about taking what I had left to the tip but decided to try one more go, so £30 from a load of stuff destined for the tip isn't bad The remainder really will be going there this time though, nothing left thats worth having really. Hopefully this will also mean I gain some space back in the garage again too :T

Ds is due home between 3 and 4 today, can't wait, I really miss him when he goes away now

benbenandme

So ds has returned home and in his bag are two envelopes with my name on, one says "ds swimming cheque" and the other is a birthday card (which usually has a cheque in too), both from ex-mil. Aaaaaagggggggghhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!! Part of the ongoing stress is to do with ex and I have been advised to have no contact whatsoever with him and so can't believe she has sent these :mad: :mad: :mad: Am actually quite angry about it, without being able to fully explain the situation, but basically am really angry that she expects me to accept 2 cheques from her or that she thinks I would want anything from her :mad: :mad: :mad: So now I am composing a note to go in an envelope, with her two envelopes (unopened) to send back to her.

benbenandme

Okay, heres the note I'm going to attach, please feel free to let me know your comments; I'm not wanting to offend her but I do need to be quite blunt with her or the message doesn't always get through

Oh, and theres some info in the note that will explain my problem a bit more, and its for something that is nothing to do with me but the ex from hell has implicated me in :mad: :mad: :mad:

Dear Ex-MIL,

Please find enclosed the two envelopes you sent to me via ds. As I explained before, I was advised when I was arrested not to have contact and therefore I have returned them to you. Once my name has been cleared from this mess that I have been implicated in then perhaps I will be willing to resume contact with you as I appreciate it is not your fault, however at the moment, and following the advice given at the police station, I have had more than enough of this situation, I’m extremely angry about it and would appreciate it if you could understand and respect my wishes to be left alone. The only exception to this is if you need to contact me if there is a problem with ds while he is away from his home.
Benbenandme

Keeping_Motivated

Oh gosh Benben you really have been going through it :eek:

I think your letter is dignified and to the point, you have to protect you and DS from what is going on (even though I don't know what it is exactly) so the letter is obviously your way of keeping some control.

You take care x

chops22

benbenandme wrote: »

Okay, heres the note I'm going to attach, please feel free to let me know your comments; I'm not wanting to offend her but I do need to be quite blunt with her or the message doesn't always get through

Oh, and theres some info in the note that will explain my problem a bit more, and its for something that is nothing to do with me but the ex from hell has implicated me in :mad: :mad: :mad:

Dear Ex-MIL,

Please find enclosed the two envelopes you sent to me via ds. As I explained before, I was advised when I was arrested not to have contact and therefore I have returned them to you. Once my name has been cleared from this mess that I have been implicated in then perhaps I will be willing to resume contact with you as I appreciate it is not your fault, however at the moment, and following the advice given at the police station, I have had more than enough of this situation, I’m extremely angry about it and would appreciate it if you could understand and respect my wishes to be left alone. The only exception to this is if you need to contact me if there is a problem with ds while he is away from his home.
Benbenandme

Sorry, always read, and often copy lists!! Don't often post x
My goodness!! No wonder you are feeling like everything is getting on top of you a little lately. Sounds terrible.

Good note, clear and to the point, so no room for her to missunderstand again.

You sound such a together and lovely person, hope its all resolved for you soon. I am impressed that you got your but to the car boot this morning too!! ( I would have stayed in bed eating chocolate!! )

benbenandme

Thank you both, I don't want to offend her, its not her fault, however its also not mine either and I am just exhausted from trying to remain friendly when I just wish her family would all get out of my life for good

Hopefully this will help explain why I have been unfocused recently on my weight and my £10 a day challenge; basically the situation involves my ex, someone elses bank account and him paying my child maintenance .... sure you can all figure whats happened :mad: But of course, in her eyes he's done nothing wrong and its all just a big mistake :cool: But in the mean time I'm on bail until the end of October :eek: :eek: I feel much better for filling you all in a bit more on the situation, at least then when I go off on one you all know why now

Alisonpennypincher

Hi BBAM,

Long time lurker here, but could not read and run this time. So sorry to hear about what you are being put through. At this difficult time hold onto the fact that you are a super mum and in years to come DS will appreciate all of what you do for him and the tough times you have been through.

I wish you all the luck in the world with this situatuion and all your other challenges, don't beat yourself up about the weight loss, or the money saving. You have done fantastically on both points and if anyone can get things back on track you can!

APP

EllieMarie

benbenandme wrote: »

Okay, heres the note I'm going to attach, please feel free to let me know your comments; I'm not wanting to offend her but I do need to be quite blunt with her or the message doesn't always get through

Oh, and theres some info in the note that will explain my problem a bit more, and its for something that is nothing to do with me but the ex from hell has implicated me in :mad: :mad: :mad:

Dear Ex-MIL,

Please find enclosed the two envelopes you sent to me via ds. As I explained before, I was advised when I was arrested not to have contact and therefore I have returned them to you. Once my name has been cleared from this mess that I have been implicated in then perhaps I will be willing to resume contact with you as I appreciate it is not your fault, however at the moment, and following the advice given at the police station, I have had more than enough of this situation, I’m extremely angry about it and would appreciate it if you could understand and respect my wishes to be left alone. The only exception to this is if you need to contact me if there is a problem with ds while he is away from his home.
Benbenandme

Oh Benben, the situation with your ex sounds really dire. It's bad enough you have to put up with him anyhow but when you are just trying to do your utmost to work, run a home and look after your DS getting you involved in what sounds like a really bad situation is appalling.

I think your note to ex MIL is absolutely acceptable - you've remained dignified but stated your point firmly.

Hugs x

SarahNeedle1872

Just found your thread this morning, and caught up over the last half hour.... you really have been through it with your ex!!! Grrr!!!

But you sound really strong and like a fantastic Mum!

The note is straight to the point, but not rude at all - much better than I would have been!!

Sx