Help! Misses has aquired massive debts

dark_stranger

I took a phone call yesterday from "Capital one" for my girl friend and they asked if she could call them & that she would know what it was about.

Anyway, knowing credit card companies I know they dont phone you for a social call. Therefore put it to her & advised that if she has got a credit card I want to know as I dont work all the hrs so that we can have nice things & no debts. I also advised her that they asked for **********, when her name is Cook, and mine is Smith & that could be seen a fraud. Anyway, received a txt earlier this morning and thought it was a joke message, but unfortunately not & she owns 10K!, 10K, i didnt see that one coming. I have giving her till midday to figure out what she plans to do & I have offered to help her, but only if she helps herself & asks her dad/mum for help.

I have told her she will have to cancel her car insurance and loose the car. stop wasting money on fags/dvd's/chocolate, etc, I have also considered balance transfers, etc but what other optinos are there?

Also, what can i do to stop the dreaded early morning knock at the door from the balifs to remove all the possessions I have worked hard for?

10K! Reading that txt was, its a joke right? ok, it was a incorrect sender, incorrect ammount, !!!!, 10K! stupid cow! As you can tell my heads a little fcuk at the mo.

All or any help would be great.

also if there is a better forum section that would receive more replies can a mod please move. Tar.

lynzpower

does she work mate?

has she been shopping out of boredom or something? Or not being able to budget?

sarah_skint

don't be too hard on her it might make things worse? Do you know what she spent it on? Talk through it together first and try and see it from her point of view.cheer up it could be 100K!
Sarah

dark_stranger

Hi, she does work a couple of nigths a week, but she is going to have to increase that now. I have asked her what she spent it on, and she cant give me a definitive answer. I will ask her when I get home from work. I really didnt see that one coming. Its not like she has lots of nice clothes, shoes, etc so good knows where the money has gone. Ok, maybe a couple of grand, yer, but 10K! Its not like she has to pay any bills as I pay all them & buy all the food, etc so her money is hers or so I thought. If we didnt have kids, she would be out the door now! but its the fact that it effects all of us, not just the stupid cow.

cpu

First thing is to calm down. Helluva shock but you need to help deal with it too. Talking together about it will be more productive than you telling her what she has to do, I think?

It's a bad situation, but it's not the end of the world and you both can learn from it maybe.

Think you should remove her name from your post though, I daresay she wont be happy about the world knowing her business?

shayshay

Ok, whilst its a shock deadlines wont help either of you. Sit down, work out why and how much, check out what has to be paid back and when. Work out a SOA and then you can see where the money is going and where it then needs to be cutback.

I am sure that a good majority of people on here have hidden a debt including myself and whilst we feel stupid at the time, getting deadlines and threats to get rid of this and that wont help your partner. I do not understand what you are feeling now so can't and won't judge you.

On the bright side it could have been 100k.

dark_stranger

cpu wrote:

Helluva shock but you need to help deal with it too.

You dam right!

cpu wrote:

Think you should remove her name from your post though, I daresay she wont be happy about the world knowing her business?

True, but its a little to late for her to be worrying about other peoples feelings/views.

lynzpower

She will know what she spent it on, thats what statements are for.

when i was going through my old statements not so long ago for my own shock value, it was obvious where the money had gone, as it said so on the statements!

dark_stranger

lynzpower wrote:

She will know what she spent it on, thats what statements are for.

when i was going through my old statements not so long ago for my own shock value, it was obvious where the money had gone, as it said so on the statements!

Good point.

CM86_2

I'd get a copy of your credit record!

How did she apply for a card in your surname?

dark_stranger

CM86 wrote:

How did she apply for a card in your surname?

These any 100's more questions need to be answered when I get home. Tell you the truth dont feel much like working at the mo, but being selfemployed, no work no money & god dam we need all we can get now.

What will a credit record tell me?