MSE Parents Club Part 13

Sami_Bee

3onitsway wrote: »

I've tried contacting them, and have emailed anyone I can think of.

I've had nothing from them, and a couple of emails from papers telling us to let them know what happens re refund. :mad:

I've just spoken to trading standards who've 'logged' me and given me a ref. number.

They said to send the complaint again to them, by snail mail recorded delivery as email can be denied.

Give them 7 days to respond. If they don't, ring trading standards when the 7 days are up.

They said a strange thing though. They said to ask for the £1200 holiday cost, £100 for petrol, and to think of an amount for the stress/upset//inconvenience. How on earth do you think up a figure for that?


I've had my step dad since I was 11. I call him by his name - but I think that's because i've never particularly liked him. :rotfl:

OH has been with us since L was 2. She mostly calls him by his name, but sometimes, if she's being snuggly or she wants something, calls him Dad.

We had the same conversation when I was pregnant with V. L was worried that when V is saying Daddy, she might get confused with L calling him his name. I said it's totally up to her what she wants to call him.

If we're all out together and OH is referred to as Dad - we don't correct them. OH would have been 17 when J was born so it is possible.

Just trying to find more detail but the boy in this story http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/boy-5-cleared-of-theft-gets-1636300-2037991.html got a certain amount for emotional distress I think, I'll keep looking for the breakdown of the damages, it might help you decide if your talking 10's 100' or 1000's ??


One of my good friends calls her actual mum by her real name, she is a bit mad tho

If Lucy is feeling confident she could reply to "are they all yours" with no I stole them or something equally cheeky I think I'd just say yes, if the girls see her as a mum type figure then I guess they'd be ok with that. what has it go to do with some random on the street whether she gave birth to them or not.

SugarSpun

Sami_Bee wrote: »

Does everyone else consult their OH on their contraceptive choices? I just told OH what I'm doing (I do just tell him lots of things tho, guess who wears the trousers in this house:cool: )

I do, but then I don't like taking the pill and am a bit squeamish about the coil as well so the discussion (such as it was) had to be a joint decision to use condoms/think of something else. Fortunately since we'd like another baby reasonably soonish the question does not apply at the moment :cool:

3onitsway wrote: »

They said a strange thing though. They said to ask for the £1200 holiday cost, £100 for petrol, and to think of an amount for the stress/upset//inconvenience. How on earth do you think up a figure for that?

I would look at the most expensive comparable trip that is convenient for you all and add on the difference in price between that and the Bastage Camp holiday. And then I would add a bit. And a bit more.

pinknico

Manonthemoon, I am a stepmum and was for 6 years before I had my first. They were 5 and three when my OH got together and had always known me by my first name but like others they do not correct people who refer to me as their mum . My three take great delight in calling me by my first name whenever their brother and sister visit!

My_Fathers_Daughter

3 - I reckon a couple of hundred quid for your inconvenience should be the way to go...

It is not like they are going to offer you thousands and thousands of pounds for distress (mores the pity)

In fact, I would suggest that TS are way off the mark in even asking you to do it, you don't get anything in PI cases for emotive elements so I think it unlikely that you would in this case if it went to court.

No more than £500 IMHO


Although I wish I could charge the barstools £500 for every damn tear that your family has shed over their !!!!!!! incompetence and ignorance.

ManOnTheMoon

3onitsway wrote: »

I've tried contacting them, and have emailed anyone I can think of.

I've had nothing from them, and a couple of emails from papers telling us to let them know what happens re refund. :mad:

I've just spoken to trading standards who've 'logged' me and given me a ref. number.

They said to send the complaint again to them, by snail mail recorded delivery as email can be denied.

Give them 7 days to respond. If they don't, ring trading standards when the 7 days are up.

They said a strange thing though. They said to ask for the £1200 holiday cost, £100 for petrol, and to think of an amount for the stress/upset//inconvenience. How on earth do you think up a figure for that?


I've had my step dad since I was 11. I call him by his name - but I think that's because i've never particularly liked him. :rotfl:

OH has been with us since L was 2. She mostly calls him by his name, but sometimes, if she's being snuggly or she wants something, calls him Dad.

We had the same conversation when I was pregnant with V. L was worried that when V is saying Daddy, she might get confused with L calling him his name. I said it's totally up to her what she wants to call him.

If we're all out together and OH is referred to as Dad - we don't correct them. OH would have been 17 when J was born so it is possible.

Well, keep going with it. If I think of anyone to complain too, I shall mention it. Their must be some kind of governing body for holidays and like I mentioned before, contact your local MP.

The figure you are meant to think up, is rather bizarre. It's not something you can just pluack out of the air. Maybe someone can help with that, but for me, it would be about getting your money back and making sure they can't do this again. The real upset won't go away with a bit of extra money (although it would enable you to put it towards another holiday maybe, if you are not scarred)

:rotfl:@ your step dad. I know people who were made to call step parents mum or dad and I think that it's the childs choice.

I like 'L's method :rotfl:

All valid points and I think I would be the most confused one. When the kids called my last partner 'mum' I did too :rotfl:and Lucy calls me dad accidently :rotfl:even when the kids aren't around

Evansangel wrote: »

Unfortunatly my Dad and Stepmum have split up, but i still care for her and still invited her to my wedding.

The 2 boys dont seem to question why i call her Naomi and call my dad 'Dad'. They are 3 and 7.

I used to get her mothers day cards too that said 'Mum' on the front

Oh, sorry to hear that, but glad to hear you still care for her.

They may ask one day, but when they are old enough to understand and as MFD says, step families are common these days.

Actually, the girls got Lucy a Mothers Day card and presents, but told her to ignore the mother bit and that it was because she was like a mother but not. Awkward but Lucy loved it.

Glamazon

Sami_Bee wrote: »

I'm sorry but what has it got to do with him? its your womb, not like its got any affect on him (if he has some macho notion that he's so big he'll feel it then he's wrong, my OH felt the strings of mine like once in over a year of me having it)
Does everyone else consult their OH on their contraceptive choices? I just told OH what I'm doing (I do just tell him lots of things tho, guess who wears the trousers in this house:cool: )

We always discuss things and make decisions together, as my options are limited I don't want to rush into something so talk it through with him. He is very much a pessimist so always looks at what could go wrong and he's just concerned about the risks of having something in the womb, and I can see where he's coming from so respect that. It's got nothing to do with him thinking he might feel it :rotfl:(although maybe in his head a small part might think that!)

OH used to never ever make decisions and left it all to me (basically so if it was the wrong decision it wasn't his fault!) but I've got him out of this habit now so we always make our decisions together.

I have a Stepdad who is fantastic - call him by his first name. He gets Father's Day cards
I have a Stepmum who like EA isn't with my Dad anymore - she is Lucy (;)) and is about 13 years older than me. I don't call her mum but gave her Mother's Day cards and am still very much in contact with her as she was more of a friend that a mum to me.

I agree with Sami - a cheeky remark to a cheeky question usually does the trick

Bah, it's raining and I have a long walk to the car

Can you tell work is quiet today?

My_Fathers_Daughter

LOL - I am such a meanie compared to you lot!!


If someone asked me if my step sons were all mine I would tell them that it was none of their business!!! Or say something like 'why, would you like to buy one of them?' or 'well I can't see anybody else claiming them'.

cazscoob

3onitsway wrote: »

Well, this morning they went in for a planned c-section and have a beautiful 7lb baby boy.

And, I found some stokke textiles sets on ebay (they've been very few & far between and expensive lately), in Olive for £120.00.
I did a google wondering where they were getting them from, and found a company selling 'the last few' for £69.99 including postage.
I ordered one, then they emailed me to say there was an error on the site and they'd sold out - the did however have a red one that I could have for £50.00. :j

*comes out of lurking*
great news on the new baby

Ohhhhh we are gonna be Stokke twins as i ordered a red one! Kiddiecare also have the older style footmuff for £39.99 reduced so that could be bought with your savings

MOTM my step dad is called by his first name but i do refer to him as 'my dad'.

Evansangel

Glam, i also have a stepdad who i call my his first name.

My mum and him raised me (i was 9 when they married) so he gets Fathers Day cards also.

He is also Lilys grandad, she's lucky, she has 3 grandads

I dont consider my stepmum as a nan to Lily though, mainly because she's only 32...

Something very sad just happened, i got out some paracetomal as i have a massive headache, but it slipped out of my hand and fell into the sink and down the drain :wall:
So i only had 1 to take, which wont help this headache at all.

Will buy some more at the co-op

ManOnTheMoon

Sami_Bee wrote: »

One of my good friends calls her actual mum by her real name, she is a bit mad tho

If Lucy is feeling confident she could reply to "are they all yours" with no I stole them or something equally cheeky I think I'd just say yes, if the girls see her as a mum type figure then I guess they'd be ok with that. what has it go to do with some random on the street whether she gave birth to them or not.

My girls sometimes cheekily call me by my first and middle name, but they know I don't mind if it's jesting or they are looking for me to chase them.

I like the cheeky response attitude. As long as the person then takes it literally and calls the police :eek:

I think the concern wasn't so much about what others think (i've put up with single dad comments for a while) but more what was comfortable for the girls and Lucy. I don't personally have any real concerns either way, just that it works for everyone. If some want to call her Lucy and some call her Mum, i'm not bothered and Lucy isn't either, but she'd like to know where she stood I think. For her, it is what others think, she tends to worry even though my attitude is 'no-one elses business'.

pinknico wrote: »

Manonthemoon, I am a stepmum and was for 6 years before I had my first. They were 5 and three when my OH got together and had always known me by my first name but like others they do not correct people who refer to me as their mum . My three take great delight in calling me by my first name whenever their brother and sister visit!

That's good to hear. Good to hear some more cheekiness too. I like cheeky kids :rotfl:Sounds like Lucy and the girls shouldn't be worried at all. It's just those awkward moments when people ask as people do when they see so many people together. Usually little old ladies that ask.

That reminds me, the old dear from a couple of doors down, whose husband is a lovely old bloke, popped in this morning and when alone with me asked me if I was planning on having a vasectomy :rotfl:Cheeky bint.