worst night of my life

DawnW

Stephy,
Please don't be brought down by your parents' issues - heart attack indeed! They are trying to control you, and they have no right. But they have obviously brought you up to be responsible and to have ambition, so they are basically very good parents.

As for the different generation stuff, that is complete rubbish - my kids are older than you (36, 34 and 26). So, you tried smoking - big deal. So did I, when I was about 14 - as I have asthma, it was a really bad idea :rotfl:So I did the sensible thing! And you have got into a bit of student debt. Well, you and how many thousands of others?

I think they are rather like my parents (now that really WAS a different generation :rotfl:). I desperately wanted to go to uni and they wouldn't let me - it was like that in those days :mad:. So I rushed in to marriage to get away, and had 3 kids. And guess what? we are still married And I went to uni, and became a teacher, and then went back to uni etc. They were being protective in their own way, and couldn't understand me wanting a different life to theirs

I'm afraid they never did come to understand. My remaining relatives still have not a clue what I do for a living. We did grow apart, though always got on, at least on the surface, they adored my children and I looked after them as best I could when they were old.

BUT remember, it is YOUR life, not theirs, and as far as we know, we only have the one, so live it! Good luck for the future, and hang on to that boyfriend of yours

Your parents will get used to it - and don't let them make you feel guilty. They really do have no right.

stephy110288

my night didnt go very well... hence being home and back on here at 8:30. you know they say you should never drink when you're in a bad mood? they are right. i'm not a big drinker at all, but when i get home from a mad shift i like a glass of wine to help me chill out before bed. but tonight once i had one drink i could feel myself startin to cry. i met my boyfriend and his work friends so i left after one drink, i didnt want to embarress myself. my lovely boyfriend said he'd come home with me but i wouldnt let him, why should this ruin his night too? i'm home now and cant stop cryin, i cant stop thinking about what my dad said and what i have done to them. i feel horrific and i really hate myself right now i know its only day one of this and it will get better, it just feels so bad right now

GEEGEE8

Oh no sweetie don't cry xx
Why don't you have a scan through the posts on here and remember why it is you were feeling better.
You can't let things like this rule your life, it really isn't worth getting so upset about.
No more wine for you either, it does make people more upset sometimes x

GEEGEE8

This will cheer you up!

http://failblog.org/

beanielou

Look at this way ~will it still matter in 10 days, 10 weeks, 10 months , 10 years??~ you get my drift & the answer is no.
you are not a bad person.

stephy110288

hahahahaha thats amazing. i have seen them on youtube before but never the pics. proper made me giggle just now. thank you

GEEGEE8

failblog is amazing!
Like beanielou says, it won't matter in weeks to come, so try and move on from it and don't let it get you down. It always seems worse at the time..
Now, you have hours of fail.blog to snigger away to.. haha

babymoo

Have only read the first page of responses and my gut reaction is that you are an adult. Your parents grew up in a different generation where credit probably wasn't so easy to come by and they had to save for things. If my parents were that judgemental about something I wouldn't tell me either. Had my parents found the letter that way I would tell them it is sorted out and explain how it is being sorted but you have no need what so ever to explain how you got into the mess. The important thing is you are getting out of it. You don't live under their roof so they can't give you that "while you live in my house..." crap.

Tell them where to get off if they start judging you. They are not you. End of, and good luck xx

rupe34

Hi Stephy - have just read the thread all the way through. Not too much to add as you have had great advice from the fab posters on here. Just wanted to say - ring your fab boyfriend and get him home when he's finished with his work mates! He sounds lovely, and obviously wanted to be with you and look after you - so let him!;)

stephy110288

he is amazing. and hes comin home as soon as the match is finished. i just hate the thought of him having to babysit me and missing out on things because of this situation. and i dont want to be like her indoors naggin him to come home!
today has made me realise how lucky i am to have him though. i have read alot of posts about people being terrified of tellin their partner about their debt. thing is me and him were friends before we got together, so he knew anyway, and i guess i never thought anything of how he was about it. but really it affects his life too. he has 20 grand in a saving scheme for a deposit on a house, and maybe we would have bought one together but obviously its never been mentioned because he knows i cant. he lends me money when i'm stuck, i always pay him back and he doesnt make me feel bad about it. i guess i never had to go through the process of telling him about it so i never worried about how he would react, he's just always known and accepted me for it, and he knows why im in debt and doesnt judge me for it. in fact the opposite, he tells me all the time that there are lots of people worse than me and that i should feel good that its under control and yet i'm still able to enjoy my life. and he hugs me when i get stressed about it and tells me its not worth stressin about!! i am very very lucky in that way, i should tell him this when he gets home.
just thought i would point out a new trauma i am going through which might make you laugh. my housemate left the lounge window open when he went out, we usually leave it open a bit as we're on the third floor so no one is going to climb in. i just walked into the lounge to get a drink and heard flappin when i opened the door. i am completely terrified of birds, always have been. it would appear a bird has got in. i closed the door and ran back to the bedroom screaming and covering my head!!!!!!!!! now what am i going to do till he gets home!!!! i have barricaded myself in my bedroom!!!!!! argh!!!!!!