Why do people be nasty to newbies?

mrcow

patchwork_cat wrote: »

QED, re read your post it is unpleasant.

A difference of opinion is what makes us all different, it is how you put it across and you are unpleasant. No doubt you justify it by saying, I am blunt, I say it how it is.... No IRL I would certainly not talk to you at the school gate as no doubt you have a reputation for being not only a know it all, but giving opinions to people who don't want them from you.

I'm not blunt. And I'm not being nearly as insulting as you are - perhaps it's you who would benefit from a re-read?

Is this all because your thread about the zoo trip isn't perhaps going the way you'd like?

kermitfrog

I originally came to this site to seek information. I then looked around to see whether I could help anyone else.

It was then that I discovered that a lot of people actually used the site as part (or all) of their social life. I have no interest in this. I don't want a paper relationship with people I don't know and who are creating an online persona which may have no resemblance to their real life character.

It is obvious therefore that people invest too much importance in the pseudo friendships that they think they have here. That's why there's nastiness (or perceived nastiness).

And it's all done publicly. I read private details here that I have no wish to know. Use email if you want to have a personal conversation.

A message board is not real life!

Premier_2

kermitfrog wrote: »

...A message board is not real life!

You're right there!

Many (but certainly not all) of the opening posts of threads, especially those created by newbies/AE accounts certainly do appear make believe to me :cool:

Outer_Limits

mrcow wrote: »

All my posts are off-thread.

I think it should be made manditory for someone to be registered for at least two weeks before they can post.

Thanks for the thought mrcow! I'd been registered on here a week before leaping into the fray with Fifer - not perhaps my wisest decision. (the attack wasn't by Fifer, btw) The parts where you can lurk pre-registration give you the illusion of understanding what's going on.

If there's a section on unwritten rules of forums for newbies I still haven't found it, but I wish they had one! There are a number of technical questions newbies raise that could be covered too.

mrcow

Outer_Limits wrote: »

Thanks for the thought mrcow! I'd been registered on here a week before leaping into the fray with Fifer - not perhaps my wisest decision. (the attack wasn't by Fifer, btw) The parts where you can lurk pre-registration give you the illusion of understanding what's going on.

If there's a section on unwritten rules of forums for newbies I still haven't found it, but I wish they had one! There are a number of technical questions newbies raise that could be covered too.

Well there are several unwritten rules - I can name a few:

1. Never ever start a thread anywhere entitled "Quitting my job, what benefits can I get?".
2. Never, ever "chat" in the codes-only free cinema tickets thread.
3. Never go onto the gambling boards and ask someone to explain matched betting to you "as there's too much to read" - you'll get rocks hurled at you.
4. Never suggest to anyone on the bankrupcy boards that perhaps they had something to do with their predicament - (as they were all victims of circumstance don't ya know).
5. Never post a thread on the Grabbit board without doing at least six searches first - or some smarta-ss will pull you up on it.
6. Never post a non-freebie on the freebie board as the same will happen.
7. If someone upsets you, before you get yourself too upset, do a search on some of their other posts - it can often speak volumes.
8. If someone is getting their pants in a twist about something or other, reminding them that "it's only an online forum deary" is more likely to enflame them even more.

Hope that helps

:cool:

Outer_Limits

mrcow wrote: »

Well there are several unwritten rules - I can name a few:

7. If someone upsets you, before you get yourself too upset, do a search on some of their other posts - it can often speak volumes.

Hope that helps

:cool:

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl: Didn't say I was brain-dead! However, maybe I am - should have thought of no. 7 - good suggestion. Thanks mrcow

alluring29

Breast_Cancer_Survivor wrote: »

She has never said anything that wasn't horrible to me, I don't know why but she has taken an instant dislike to me & she was the reason I posted that photo as I was fed up of being called a liar.

Ive noticed that no one ever steps in though when she is abusing me so maybe you are all scared of her.

I actually felt sorry for her when I read what she'd wrote on your depression thread, well until she attacked me on one of the other threads.

Well, I posted as a newbie yesterday and got some good advice and some rude posts. Must admit one post from Sunnyone was really nice and then about 2 hours later received a horrible one from her, complete turnaround.

I was going to leave this site because of the amount of rude posts I received but because it was half my fault (I couldn't figure out things), decided to stay and also, the fact that I now need to stay on top of any changes.

I do think people could be a bit more welcoming to newbies (not all of you, some of you were really nice, even when I was completely confuddled and didn't have a clue heh).:)

gravitytolls

mrcow wrote: »

Well there are several unwritten rules - I can name a few:

1. Never ever start a thread anywhere entitled "Quitting my job, what benefits can I get?".
2. Never, ever "chat" in the codes-only free cinema tickets thread.
3. Never go onto the gambling boards and ask someone to explain matched betting to you "as there's too much to read" - you'll get rocks hurled at you.
4. Never suggest to anyone on the bankrupcy boards that perhaps they had something to do with their predicament - (as they were all victims of circumstance don't ya know).
5. Never post a thread on the Grabbit board without doing at least six searches first - or some smarta-ss will pull you up on it.
6. Never post a non-freebie on the freebie board as the same will happen.
7. If someone upsets you, before you get yourself too upset, do a search on some of their other posts - it can often speak volumes.
8. If someone is getting their pants in a twist about something or other, reminding them that "it's only an online forum deary" is more likely to enflame them even more.

Hope that helps

:cool:

Who else has read the list and now wants to commit every offence on it?

Just me.................. Nah, don't believe that.

amus

Ive found some people are far too quick to label new posters trolls e.g. https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/2563909=

I for one thought this thread seemed pretty legitimate (I may be guillible?), as having worked in a bank I have known it to happen, however certain posters were hurling troll abuse at the OP. If that had been my first post I would have been both uttely confused and would not want to come back. Then again I could be completely wrong and OP is a troll.