**** I'm pregnant

gonzo127

thank you very much for keeping us informed, it does sound to me as if he has just been knocked for six and the knee jerk reaction was to say we are not ready so we should get rid.

i think since you had already discussed children with him and was thinking about it within a year or so i think he might just need some time to get his head around it, and if he doesnt as others have said you will cope, many many people do.

so now i am hoping i can be the first on here to say congratulations

edit - yey i am

**confuzzled**

Wannabe I really hope he comes round to the idea:) hopefully it was just the shock with it happening faster than planned!
My hubby and I have a lot more debt than you and shock horror..I'm pregnant! Even worse...our baby was planned:eek::D It took us almost a whole year to conceive our baby which in a way is a blessing as we've managed to pay off more than we anticipated doing so far BUT our compromise is that I WILL be going back to work when baby is only 6 months old and we will just about manage on the reduced wage..thats not including tax credits or any benefits:)
We're both on an average wage for where we live and are happy with our agreement...just need hubby to get excited about it now..he's more interested in the world cup atm:p:rotfl:

Good luck to you both and i hope you start enjoying the pregnancy, the nausea will be kicking in before you know it:p:D xxx

gonzo127

**confuzzled** wrote: »

just need hubby to get excited about it now..he's more interested in the world cup atm:p:rotfl:

i think this is sometimes down the the fact
a women is a mother from the moment shes pregnant
a man is not a father until he holds his child

i know it is different for different people, and i was like a kiddie in a candy store when i found out my wife was pregnant although was bricking it every moment of every day (didnt help that she had already had a miscarrage), i didnt 100% feel like a father until the nurse handed me my little baby girl

**confuzzled**

gonzo127 wrote: »

i think this is sometimes down the the fact
a women is a mother from the moment shes pregnant
a man is not a father until he holds his child

i know it is different for different people, and i was like a kiddie in a candy store when i found out my wife was pregnant although was bricking it every moment of every day (didnt help that she had already had a miscarrage), i didnt 100% feel like a father until the nurse handed me my little baby girl

I've been told this by others:) at 1st I was upset and couldn't understand it & was constantly in a strop with him(I blamed the hormones:p) but now I can totally understand it as I'd probs feel the same if the roles were reversed:) Besides he's not exactly known for being emotive!:rotfl: I just try and involve him in everything so he doesn't feel left out, I tell him everything:D and I've asked him to talk to start talking to my belly, which bless him, he does...although he admitted he felt like a right knob doing it:p:rotfl::rotfl: and he's voluntarily kissing my belly before we got to sleep at night which in my opinion is a HUGE step for him:D:D:D I'm just really looking forward to the day he offers to come baby shopping with me:p

gonzo127

**confuzzled** wrote: »

I'm just really looking forward to the day he offers to come baby shopping with me:p

aha easy one here, set him some tasks such as

we need a travel system/buggy we have this much to spend can you find the best one

same with baby monitors and cots and car seats

so basically anything which needs some internet research etc or thats 'big' or needs 'man skills'

sort of like this - ug, me man, me build best cot ug (now wheres a caveman hitting his chest smiley?)

Metranil_Vavin

gonzo I agree with what you say too.

My OH is desperate to be a father, and I am pregnant now, but having suffered a miscarriage earlier this year, he just will not allow himself to get excited about it until we are much further down the road.

OP I really hope it all works out for you. What a sad situation to be in, but by following your heart I think you're definitely doing the right thing x

tiamai_d

gonzo127 wrote: »

i think this is sometimes down the the fact
a women is a mother from the moment shes pregnant
a man is not a father until he holds his child

i know it is different for different people, and i was like a kiddie in a candy store when i found out my wife was pregnant although was bricking it every moment of every day (didnt help that she had already had a miscarrage), i didnt 100% feel like a father until the nurse handed me my little baby girl

Very, very true in my experience.

We women are bombarded with the feelings and physical reality of pregnancy from usually before we even find out. A man just doesn't get to experience that in the same way till baby is actually out and is a proper person.

Of course, there are also men who are just as over awed while their partner is pregnant, or even trying to conceive, but mostly, it's not till the birth it sinks in.

purplepardalis

gonzo127 wrote: »

aha easy one here, set him some tasks such as

we need a travel system/buggy we have this much to spend can you find the best one

same with baby monitors and cots and car seats

so basically anything which needs some internet research etc or thats 'big' or needs 'man skills'

sort of like this - ug, me man, me build best cot ug (now wheres a caveman hitting his chest smiley?)

That's a really good idea and would work like a dream in my house!

**confuzzled**

gonzo127 wrote: »

aha easy one here, set him some tasks such as

we need a travel system/buggy we have this much to spend can you find the best one

same with baby monitors and cots and car seats

so basically anything which needs some internet research etc or thats 'big' or needs 'man skills'

sort of like this - ug, me man, me build best cot ug (now wheres a caveman hitting his chest smiley?)

One step ahead of you;) Already done that...his excuse...wait til we get HIP grant to pay for travel system and wait til WorldCup is over so he can 'concentrate on what is needed properly':rotfl: Good job bubs isn't due til end of October.......now how do I learn to be patient?!?!:p:rotfl:

tiamai_d

Ha! Atleast you can get your OH to look at prams! Mine refused to even think about it, wouldn't even look in the direction of Mothercare.

Did mean I got to spend loads on eBay and he couldn't say anything right enough

On the eBay thing...

Crib - Bought £25, used 6 months, sold £25.50
Cot - Bought a £200 mothercare one for £40 new, mattress £40 (sprung)
Prams - well... ahem, I am about £20 up on the few I have bought and sold, using my bargain Joolz at the moment.
Car seat - Bought £30 argos, sold £10
Pretty dresses - went mad on the eBay, but I bought a few at 99p and sold them for £5, so I claim to be up

Babies needn't be expensive, and I am also a bit snobby to say my daughter is dressed mainly in Next and other brands, but bought cheaper than asda/tesco