HaHa my parents are having me over!

tabskitten

MsDee wrote: »

Not at all - would you be happy about your gastric band, shopping habits, waxing etc. Dad got own business and pays all bills, brother doing this and that, boyfriend and me live in XXX, they have another house they rent out...

I doubt you would

Sorry you have misunderstood me- i was agreeing with you that the OP should not have posted this infomation, firstly for the reasons that you state and secondly as it is irrelevant to question a LL as to what they decide to do with their money, free time etc etc.

MsDee

tabskitten wrote: »

Sorry you have misunderstood me- i was agreeing with you that the OP should not have posted this infomation, firstly for the reasons that you state and secondly as it is irrelevant to question a LL as to what they decide to do with their money, free time etc etc.

Apologies - it is late, I thought you were disagreeing with me. I should go to bed now:)

looby-loo_2

Up to £40 a week is tax free under the governments 'rent a room' scheme.
Presumably they will be paying tax on the higher amount they want from you and will have informed their mortgage company and home insurance company about having lodgers thus paying more.

Alternatively could you sit down with them and offer to pay a little more on the understanding that you will save the rest towards your deposit thus being able to move out without renting which your father is against?

Doom_and_Gloom

When my fiance and I were living at my parents we paid them £30/week each in the way of keep. This included our food, our own living room, en suite and bedroom! This amount covered all of the costs of us being there.

OP I think you should offer your parents £35 each (so £70 for the both of you) with the knowledge that you will both buy your own food. This would be double what you were paying but less than the £400 the want a month. I think your partner paying the same as what you were is fair.

OP I am also sorry for what you have gone through. It can not be easy for you at all. I think the way you are feeling makes you more resentful for the change of amount they want. Your parents need to understand you have been through something traumatic and that a 'shake up' like this is not going to be good for you. If they have hit money trouble that is their own fault and they should be adult enough to deal with it on their own. Not try and get their daughter and her partner to bail them out!

blabberwort

Forgive me if im saying the same thing as others, I havent read this thread in it's entirety.

First of all sorry to be blunt but what your parents household expenses/incomings/savings are is actually none of your business. It's their house and their private business what their money is spent on. If my daughter (when she starts paying rent/housekeeping ) asked me what I spent my money on i'd tell her to mind her own business. This isnt a house share, this is your parents home.

Secondly I agree that £400 is a ridiculous amount to charge when it was originally a third of that. Even though your brother has moved out and they dont receive his money any more, that still doesnt make it £100 by asking you to cover it. Im sorry to say it but it sounds like your parents are taking the mick. The fact is however that as it is their home they should not have to justify to you why they want more money, just that they do.

I would personally move out. You can get cheaper (I think I read you saying) elsewhere and you'll have more privacy. While I expect parents to not have to subsidise their adult children, I dont believe for one minute it costs them £100 a week for the 2 of you when your buying your own food. Electric would be a small amount extra, tv license has to be paid regardless wether your there or not, council tax also has to be paid regardless and any insurances etc. Electric/water/gas does not cost £50 each so I hate to say it, but sounds to me like your parents are taking advantage of you. I would get the hell out and at least then you may beable to keep a good relationship with them rather than one that seems to be becoming resentful.

lonestar1

Wow I had similar problem a couple of years back. Im single and folks retired. Suddenly my Dad wanted to double my rent from 200 to 400 a month.

I asked him to see copy of bills for last 12 months He wouldnt show them to me but a bit of digging on here gets you some idea of monthly costs.

I did ask for a rent book as officially the government only allow owners to rent a room for 4k a year before they should pay tax on it as above that its deemed as including an element of profit. Perhaps you could mention this to them, could save u 800 a year and stop them getting in trouble with the taxman. Didnt work for me though but Im still here cant deny its cheaper than the alternative

Raggs_2

Move out. Your parents need a reality check too. It is not costing them 400 pounds a month to house you and your boyfriend, and whilst it shouldn't just be about what it's costing them, it is a rather big thing.

If you can get a house share, including bills, for less than you pay for the same thing now, then you can happily state to them that you can save even more money by moving out, thus removing that argument, plus it will ease the family strains. If they then state that they need the cash, tell them you can help them with finances using MSE methods, but you still intend to move out.

And move out, even if they do offer to drop the rates, it sounds like you may have reached the point where the relationship will just become worse and worse unless you can get some space between you.

nollag2006

It amazes me that grown adults still expect their parents to virtually wipe thier nose for them.

You are a grown up. Your parents owe you nothing.

You need to grow a spine and move out into the big bad world on your own.

Jowo_2

looby-loo wrote: »

Up to £40 a week is tax free under the governments 'rent a room' scheme.

It's closer to £82 per week - it's £4250 over the course of the year as a tax threshold.

But the post is more than just a simple accommodation issue, it's obviously more of a relationship one with a bit of immaturity thrown in the mix.

madeupname1

Just to add my two pennies worth. When I lived at home I paid a nominal rent. However, it was always accepted that the amount paid would be heavily discounted since I was my parent's child and not some lodger off the street. I recognise that not all parents treat their children in this way. I had friends who basically had to fund themselves through higher education. In my family that would be unheard of.

My personal view is that what your parents are charging does not appear to be particularly discounted given your personal relationship. Certainly that is their right. However, if they are looking at this from a commercial rather than personal perspective, perhaps you should too and think about striking out on your own with your boyfriend / fiance. It may be a little more expensive, but having your own space can be worth the extra spent.