HaHa my parents are having me over!

DanielleNic87

Both myself and my OH live with my parents and we both pay £150 each per month, which excludes food! We find it alot cheaper than having our own place! We actually moved into a flat together and moved back home 6 months later!!!

not_loaded

Leanna, I worry that you don’t fully understand the real cost of setting up on your own.

Some people have put budget calcs above to try and help you in working it all out. You should set that up as a spreadsheet (or just pencil & paper) and add in absolutely everything you spend.

Petrol/transport, fags, drinks out/meals out, papers/mags, make up etc, etc. Don’t forget food isn’t the only add-on to what you see as rent. Cleaning materials, wash powder, loo rolls; they all add up. Wander around the house and look in all the cupboards to see what you currently benefit from, that in your own place you’d be responsible for buying. If there are unknowns in your calculation ask here for some input on the missing costs.

Your current deal sounds good to me, but if you can’t tolerate the set-up then maybe you feel you have to go, but there is an expression: out of the frying pan into the fire. (see DanielleNic87’s post just above…)

Don’t forget that you probably have to take your emotions and recent upset into account. You and your boyfriend should look at the big picture over a few days. Don’t do it with input from other biased people, look at it purely as a business type calculation. Good luck with your decision!

forgotmylogin

As a compromise, why don't you ask your parents if you can use your brother's room as a sitting room for you and your boyfriend, that way you get more privacy and space and you may feel you are getting more for your money.

sharpee

It sounds like your parents are struggling to cover the costs of the house. £400 per month between two is so low compared living in the real world. Think of all those years your parent looked after you, its now your turn to help them out.

If your not happy with the £400 move out

pinkshoes

Why are so many people being mean to the OP??

OP, I think your parents are out of touch! A quick look on rightmove and you can rent a large double room in a houseshare for less than £350 including all bills, meaning that the £400 you're being asked to pay is above market value, with the added stress of having to live with your parents (which in my eyes, should warrant a discount!).

I would try and negotiate £300 with your parents, then show them some of the adverts, and tell them you can't afford to pay £400 and save a deposit, so you'll have to move out.

dopester

sharpee wrote: »

It sounds like your parents are struggling to cover the costs of the house. £400 per month between two is so low compared living in the real world. Think of all those years your parent looked after you, its now your turn to help them out.

If your not happy with the £400 move out

I agree with the first part, but not the second part. There used to be a time where if you were trading up to a bigger/better/more expensive house, you'd sell your existing house and put any equity towards the new house.

Now the greed culture under Labour's rule has seen too many people think they can keep their old home, rent it out, and buy a new house... even if it takes on big debt to do so.

Under ordinary circumstances we'd be seeing full deleveraging, but with interest rates at 300 year lows, hundreds of billions of QE money, mortgage rescue schemes... its all about supporting the greed and those who took reckless decisions, and trying to stop creaking boom-time businesses going under.

It's cheating and an outright attack on the real prudent and the young. House prices would be lower, and rents... if not for the cheating within the system, making for quicker real recovery as those who have been reckless and greedy are shaken out. My sympathies are with the OP. There is a gulf between the young 20 somthings who have to stand on their own and the baby boomers who live like gods. Move out - let them burn as values crash down both their houses, and both houses are repossessed.

Leanna86 wrote: »

Thats the thing I don't know, they still own there old house which they rent out...may I add cheaper than what I pay for rent! hahaha maybe I should move in there with the 3 tenants lol

They have paid of the mortgage on that house and got a new mortgage out on this larger house, which they didn't realise the banding was top level, extra costs becaus eof the area, utility bills etc are higher than they anticipated etc. they have told me all this, I said I would help out but looking at cheaper options as not trying to undermine my mother but I wanted to help out and she one of the types to just accept renewals, quickest routes etc...but if she wont allow me I cant help.

I also said why don't they sell this house, and move back into the old one, but they said they didn't want to as this house was to be a project but as house prices dropped they would loose out.

Obviously my brother moved out, so they loose money there of £35 a week but also he ate them out of house and home so are probably saving £50 a week just from food he doesn't eat!!

I have noticed my mum has a bit of a shopping habit, my dad has also just spent £5k on a gastric band for her and £2k on laser eye treatment, and she is now buying herself lots of new clothes, jewelry etc for her new figure (she looks great by the way) and shes having her hair done every week, waxing etc. I have dropped subtle hints like oh thats new...is that another new something or other but she doesn't seem phased by me asking, she is all to willing to show her new stuff. My dad has mentioned her spending often, like he has his own business so he pays all the bills, mortgage etc. so all her wages is basically spending money, but she then says oh ive dipped into the savings to buy this and that and he says what about your wages and she will say oh I spent all that...

So I dunno, if she has a habit or whether she isn't buying too much as I don't know her account payments but thats the only things i can think of...

property.advert

The parents have screwed up and are either giving you the message that they want you out or they are abusing their position and profiteering by your staying.

The actual marginal cost of your staying there may well be £10 a week. There is no more council tax, no more maintenance, no more mortgage and only a marginal bit of electric and water and heating. Again, perhaps £10 a week.

For sure moving out would cost an awful lot more but that is not the point. Your parents are making a profit from you being there and that is wrong. I'd tell them they can have £200 a month in total, which is a near 50% increase from £35 a week or you'll move out and they will get nothing.

MsDee

Leanna86 wrote: »

Thats the thing I don't know, they still own there old house which they rent out...may I add cheaper than what I pay for rent! hahaha maybe I should move in there with the 3 tenants lol

They have paid of the mortgage on that house and got a new mortgage out on this larger house, which they didn't realise the banding was top level, extra costs becaus eof the area, utility bills etc are higher than they anticipated etc. they have told me all this, I said I would help out but looking at cheaper options as not trying to undermine my mother but I wanted to help out and she one of the types to just accept renewals, quickest routes etc...but if she wont allow me I cant help.

I also said why don't they sell this house, and move back into the old one, but they said they didn't want to as this house was to be a project but as house prices dropped they would loose out.

Obviously my brother moved out, so they loose money there of £35 a week but also he ate them out of house and home so are probably saving £50 a week just from food he doesn't eat!!

I have noticed my mum has a bit of a shopping habit, my dad has also just spent £5k on a gastric band for her and £2k on laser eye treatment, and she is now buying herself lots of new clothes, jewelry etc for her new figure (she looks great by the way) and shes having her hair done every week, waxing etc. I have dropped subtle hints like oh thats new...is that another new something or other but she doesn't seem phased by me asking, she is all to willing to show her new stuff. My dad has mentioned her spending often, like he has his own business so he pays all the bills, mortgage etc. so all her wages is basically spending money, but she then says oh ive dipped into the savings to buy this and that and he says what about your wages and she will say oh I spent all that...

So I dunno, if she has a habit or whether she isn't buying too much as I don't know her account payments but thats the only things i can think of...

This makes for uncomfortable reading. I think you are divulging too much unnecessary information about the situation and you have also stated exactly where you live in the country.

Think before you post - people can easily 'piece together' a situation. If I was your parents I'd be very angry and very hurt that my personal information - financial predicament/spending habits/weight/relationship issues were being repeated in great detail on a very popular internet site.

tabskitten

MsDee wrote: »

This makes for uncomfortable reading. I think you are divulging too much unnecessary information about the situation and you have also stated exactly where you live in the country.

Think before you post - people can easily 'piece together' a situation. If I was your parents I'd be very angry and very hurt that my personal information - financial predicament/spending habits/weight/relationship issues were being repeated in great detail on a very popular internet site.

All of which is irrelevant.

You would not ask these questions of a LL so you should not ask them of your parents.

As i said before it is their house and if you have issue paying what they ask you need to move out- I agree that you could probably rent cheaper- so go for it it will do you good to be more independent.

If your parents need financial help let them find a lodger- or two!!

MsDee

tabskitten wrote: »

All of which is irrelevant.

You would not ask these questions of a LL so you should not ask them of your parents.

As i said before it is their house and if you have issue paying what they ask you need to move out- I agree that you could probably rent cheaper- so go for it it will do you good to be more independent.

If your parents need financial help let them find a lodger- or two!!

Not at all - would you be happy about your gastric band, shopping habits, waxing etc. Dad got own business and pays all bills, brother doing this and that, boyfriend and me live in XXX, they have another house they rent out...

I doubt you would