Marital/seperation advice.

daska

It won't be Housing Benefit (HB) if you go into privately rented accommodation, it'll be Local Housing Allowance (LHA).

For you and one kiddie you'll be entitled to 2 bedrooms which, in Redcar (?) is currently £103.56/week

TallBlondie

Thats helpful Daska thankyou, so if the private rent was £450 a month, i'd pay the remainder?

daska

Yes, but if it were less you could pocket some or all of the difference - up to £15 I think? Don't underestimate how tight things get when you're relying solely on benefits (there are many threads on here demonstrating that you can't guarantee that your husband will part with maintenance easily LOL)

TallBlondie

Thankyou. What also happens to debt management payments? do they reduce them so they are affordable, like £1 a week lol by the looks of things...aaarrgghh! Appreciate all the replies x

JoJoB

Who's name is on the debts? Yours, husbands or any joint debt? Basically you are responsible for whatever you have your name on. Definitely ring the dmp company you are with and let them know the situation, but don't sweat about sorting out debts just at this point. Concentrate on benefits and housing and getting yourself settled. You can send holding letters to your creditors and offer a token payment of £1 a month while you get yourself sorted. Then look into getting debt advice from CAB.

[Deleted User]

Also if u can, try and gather together a small amount of money for emergencies. Open a basic bank account for yourself, in your name only as well, if u don't already have one. I haven't tried them but the Co-op seems to get the most recommendations here.

I wasn't sure from your answer above if he is coming back? Has he said what is to happen with finances? Try and get this information so u can plan more.., but also plan for the worse (no money if there's a hiccup of some kind) and keep some emergency cash as said above.

Finally, I am sure your thinking is very muzzled, so get a note pad, and make a list of things u need to sort out (make it simple) follow this thread if u want or make one up yourself. Cross them off as u do them and pat yourself on the back.

I know its hard, but just do one thing at a time and it'll all get done.

TallBlondie

Yes i have a note pad already and jotted on. No mention of finances which is why i am trying my best to do my homework ready. There is a private rent house available, i just hope i don't miss out on it, i dont want to accept it and then not be entitled to any help with the rent.
Also will i be given and monatry help with actual moving?
And finally the stuff in the house tv, sofa, fridge etc, does this have to stay for the sake of the child, or could he take the lot if he wanted too.

daska

Re the stuff in the house, make sure you don't take anything provided by the landlord but morally I would say you're entitled to take as much as you need to set up a home with your child. If the place you currently live in weren't provided by his employer you'd be entitled to stay there and he'd have to find somewhere else and furnish it. As it is I think, as he's effectively depriving you and his child of somewhere to live, you ought to put the removal bill in his name LOL (I'm not aware of anywhere that will help with removal costs).

When's he due back? Unless it's imminent I'd stick it out where you are in order to put together some savings.

TallBlondie

Not due back for 2 months, i've also still only had the 2 emails and the last was yesterday morning. Its the waiting and not knowing that hurts. Nothing in this house is provided by the landlord, everything is what we have bought together.

[Deleted User]

Re: Furniture.., as he will need to move into single quarters judging by what u said, I'd take all the big stuff and most of the little stuff (clocks, ornaments if u have any microwave etc). In every legal reference I've seen, u are legally entitled to take all the stuff u need to look after your child. In the sense of need, he's more able to buy new stuff if he wants to and u will be taking your child with u. Don't be generous in an attempt to please. It won't make any difference to him, and WILL make a difference to u and your child if u don't have all the items u need.

The advice to stay where u are right now is good. Will give u chance to get the finances sorted and some money saved for deposits. Don't do anything in a hurry unless u have to.., having the shock u've had could lead u to make a decision that u'd not make later on with time to reflect.

I am afraid there is no financial help available at all to help with removal expenses. I don't know why. Even the DSS system., the social fund Grant won't give u anything for removal expenses (altho possibly as u are moving from presumably armed forces accommodation, u could possibly get some help with buying new stuff from a Social Fund Grant (which u don't need to pay back) but that would need checking (I think u need to be coming out of a housing scheme like a hostel, and possible if u are in armed forces accommodation, this might count - they do seem to use personal discretion in their choices as to what counts). U need to be in receipt of income support to get a social fund grant which it is likely u will be at some point unless u are able to get work. As far as removal is concerned, when u are really short (as I have been lol), hiring a small van, the services of anyone who can drive and anyone willing to help - friends, family etc.., is the cheapest way to move. U might need to make a number of trips tho.

You are coping with what's happened unbelievably well. Well done, remember we are here if things don't feel so good at some point.