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When should children start pre-school?

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I'm a first time parent and my daughter will be 2 in March.

All the other parents I know are frantically putting their kids' names down for pre-school, with a view to them starting from either 2 or 2 and a half dependant on which pre-school they choose. This seems quite young to me :(

I've got the prospectuses and see that pre-school places aren't funded until the term after children turn 3, but I would be prepared to pay for it prior to this if it was something that she would really benefit from. I'm just not convinced that she is old enough yet. Or perhaps its me being scared to let my baby go ;)

Just wondered what other people have done and whether anyone who has been in a similar situation can offer any advice :confused:

Thanks :)
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Comments

  • Spendless
    Spendless Posts: 24,653 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper
    This might vary area to area but i'll describe what you can go to in my hiome town

    Mums and Tots - From Birth up until either full-time school or the age the group stipulates - you stay with child.

    Playgroup- From 2 and a half . They can can be left but only if potty trained (though that may again vary from place to place).

    For children born 1st Sept - 31st December funding is the term after their 3rd birthday ie In January following 3rd birthday.

    For children born 1st January -31st March funding is the term after 3rd birthday ie After Easter.

    For children born 1st April - 31st August funding is after summer term ie in September.

    In my home town not many April-August born babies take up the funding
    at playgroup as the Nursery years starts the September after their 3rd birthday regardless of when they are born. People only tend to use the playgroup instead when their is no Nursery.

    Nursery-September following 3rd birthday
    Reception Year- September following 4th birthday.

    It might also depend how busy the place is. Yesterday the mums and tots group took my daughters name down for her to feed into their playgroup when she's 2 and a half (she'll be 2 on 31 March). If i'd left it till she was 3 and then asked they may have been full.

    Have you asked anyone near you with an older child about their recommendations/experiences?

    Also I beleive this is correct but the place has to be Ofsted funded for you to receive funding for the place. The playgroups my son used to attend were not Ofsted funded so i used the funding at the private nursery he attended instead.
  • tiff
    tiff Posts: 6,608 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture Combo Breaker Savvy Shopper!
    My son went to a paying nursery 2 mornings a week from age 2 till 3. Then he went to a council nursery part time for a year, then full time for a year until he started school 2 months before he was 5.

    My daughter went to the council nursery from aged 3, part time only. The reason my son went to nursery at 2 was because I didnt know any other children in the area and there were no other children in our family. I thought it would be good for him to mix with other children, he was a happy easy going child.

    My daughter was different, she had her second heart operation when she was 2 and I didnt want to hand over the responsibility to anyone else. She was also clingy to me and I felt it was best for her to stay with me at that time rather than go to nursery.
    “A budget is telling your money where to go instead of wondering where it went.” - Dave Ramsey
  • purplepatch
    purplepatch Posts: 2,534 Forumite
    Thanks for all that information Spendless :)

    Both preschool prospectuses mention the funding so must be ok.

    My friends are sending their kids from age 2.5 (the minimum in that particular preschool). One friend in particular has an older child who has now started school, and she raves about the pre-school. Every time I see her she asks when my daughter will start there.

    Like I say, 2 and a half seems quite young to me to start their education, but I'm new to all this so not really sure if it's just me being over protective.

    I'm going to make appointments at both of the local preschools, so will talk it through with them, but really just wanted to get an idea of what others have done.

    As I understand it, our 2 local primary schools take them from age 4 (first class reception - no nursery).
  • purplepatch
    purplepatch Posts: 2,534 Forumite
    Thanks also Tiff, you posted whilst I was replying (and also whilst I was clearing up said daughter's drink that was squirted all over the living room carpet - perhaps I will send her from age 2 after all! ;) )

    Like you say, it really all depends on the child and how ready they are. My daughter is bright and fairly outgoing, but isn't particularly accustomed to being with other kids. We go to a weekly music class where she observes the others rather than approaches them, but other than that we only see other children her own age occasionally. It probably would be good for her to mix more - I suspect it's more that it's me wanting to keep her safe at home with me rather than let her venture out into the big bad world :o
  • Spendless
    Spendless Posts: 24,653 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper
    My eldest one was a live-wire who 'grew out' of mums and tots shortly after his 2nd birthday, as playgroups wouldn't take him till 2 and a half, i sent him to a private nursery one day a week instead.

    When he turned 2 and a half i put him in a playgroup (at that time in my town they could attend palygroup at and a half- but couldn't leave them until they were 3).
    I took him out of one after a few weeks. This was the only one that hadn't shown me round, let me pay for one session to try him and asked for 6 weeks fees up-front (say no more!!).

    I found another playgroup but i stayed with him till he was 3. I kept his nursery place also which was funded - the playgroup wasn't.

    I see your worried about her/him? starting their education. My experience of playgroups hasn't been this, they didn't make them know their alphabet or write their name. It was just more structured than mums and tots, he painted, had a story read to, made a mothers day card, things like this.

    The playgroup should let you look round and ask questions etc. If your school has no attached Nursery, it might bbe that they stop at playgroup until they go to full-time school.

    Also not all LEAs are like mine with only one feed in to Reception year, some do 2 or 3 feed ins. Again someone with an older child will be able to tell you.

    Best wishes

    xx
  • stardoman
    stardoman Posts: 233 Forumite
    Hi,

    My first son started nursery when he was 3 and a half and I personally feel this was early enough. This was the nursery at the school he was then going to attend and I felt it would give him a chance to get to know his fellow classmates. Although they did messy time, song time etc. it wasn't formal learning. There has been some research which has shown a link between early formal learning and dyslexia, and I personally wouldn't have wanted him sitting at a desk for long periods when he was 3. However, both the nursery and reception were based on a lot of learning through play and this is something I would definitely ask about when you visit the pre-schools.

    A friend of mine has been doing a work placement in a private nursery here, which has a very good reputation and was surprised to see how regimented it all was, with the children sitting at desks. She was even more surprised that the children go along with it. So its definitely worth asking, although I think most will be based on learning through play.

    My second child started the week after his 3rd birthday and with hindsight it was too much. He was given afternoon sessions, and although he wasn't having a nap every day by this point, I found that by the Thursday he would often fall asleep on the way to nursery. I ended up dropping Thursdays and Fridays and only sending him on Mondays and Wednesdays (he didn't go on Tuesdays anyway).

    As for the social side, neither of my children missed out by attending after they were 3. DS1 will be 7 next week and is popular at school. DS2 is 4 and still in nursery where he has many friends. DS1 is also doing very well academically. I used to worry that I'd held him back as most of my friends taught their children the alphabet and how to count before they started school. I always held off this as I didn't want to confuse him by teaching him one way, only for the teacher to then teach him another way. This seems to have paid off as the teacher has taken me to one side on several occasions to tell me how well he's doing.

    Good luck with whatever you decide. Mandy.
  • jellyhead
    jellyhead Posts: 21,555 Forumite
    10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    when my son went to nursery school (they go for a year before starting the reception year at school in the spetember after they're 4 so they start nursery the september after they're 3) the nursery ran a course to show parents how the children were taught. it was mostly how to play with children, the importance of painting, cooking, art and stories, etc. but we were shown how the nursry taught the alphabet, with arrows to show the directions for writing each letter. quite a few of us had been teaching our children the wrong way, e.g. the 'a' that the computer uses rather than a circle with a stick. they put flicks on everything nowadays, for joined up writing which they start at 8. most of us had been teaching letters without flicks. one parent was even teaching capitals instead of lower case. still, nothing wrong with teaching colours, shapes etc. at home. the nursery or school will have letter formation sheets if you ask, the school gives them out to children who are about to start in reception. the course for parents was fantastic, ucas accredited and there are further courses, e.g. in school that you can take. schools teach very differently to how we were taught, especially in numeracy. it's worth taking the courses to help with homework lol!

    i liked the letterland series, i started at home with my son. he wasn't able to go to nursery until he was 4 because he was special needs and wasn't ready. he was going to go to a special needs nursery but he got a statement of special needs (for one to one help at nursery/school) and went to mainstream nursery. he had 2 terms in nursery then one term in reception, then went into year one. one term in reception was enough for him to learn to read and he's the best reader in his year now, he scored the highest at the end of year 3 according to the SENCO at school. he gets A's in exams and is in the top stream although he still has a few problems. he's one of the youngest in the class. every child is different but i don't think a late start did my son any harm whereas an early start would have.

    between 18 months and 4 he went to a nursery two mornings a week while i finished uni. it was ofsted inspected and there was a bit of learning. he learned number and letter shapes, letter sounds and counting but it was very basic and mostly play, they spent hardly any time at a desk. i think it was good for him, he was antisocial and very introverted so he needed part time nursery to help him socialise and to be more independent from me. the nursery was excellent, very happy and friendly, nothing like a school, full of toys. visit the pre-school by all means, i wouldn't have sent mine to one where they sat at desks, plenty of time for that in the reception year, they're only 48 months old when they start school. it all depends on your child though, you might think she'd enjoy pre-school.
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  • jellyhead
    jellyhead Posts: 21,555 Forumite
    10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    sorry, forgot to add they have to be out of nappies to go to some nurseries. some children are still in nappies at 3, again it all depends on your child :-)
    52% tight
  • Spendless
    Spendless Posts: 24,653 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper
    When son was at the private nursery and when sisters twins were also last year, there was a head-count date a few weeks before the funding started.

    This was for the nursery to give details of how many children were eligible for funding pior to myself and sister being in receipt of it.

    If i hadn't sent son until the term after he was 3 and missed the head-count date, i don't think i would have been eligible for the funding. This might be worth asking about too.

    At the playgroups there was definately no sitting at desks learning, it was how i described previously, doing paintings, making models.

    At the private nursery some of the older children did certain things (if it was their nursery year- it wasn't for my son cos he did his actual nursery year at the nursery attached to the school) like jellyhead has described but the younger children did different activities at this time.
  • Savvy_Sue
    Savvy_Sue Posts: 47,312 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper
    When they are ready.

    Some are ready at 2, some at 3, some at 4, and some should still be there at 5. But let's not go there, we have to face the fact that DESPITE there being NO evidence that starting all children in Reception in the September after their 4th birthday helps them do well at school, in fact there is evidence to suggest that the less mature 4 year olds do WORSE under this system, that's the way things go now. Sorry, rant over.

    There are only pre-school places available for 2.5 year olds BECAUSE children are all taken into school at 4, you couldn't get a pre-school nursery place for any child younger than 3 a few years ago (when my eldest was that age.) So all the age ranges have dropped.

    If you don't think your child is ready, don't send her/him. If you feel s/he would benefit from spending time with other children in a fun environment, see if you can find a Toddler group which you and s/he enjoy going to together. Your Health Visitor probably has a list of local ones. If you think it's you being clingy, that may still be a better way to go than signing up for pre-school nursery separation.

    And even if it's free and you don't have to pay for it, a pre-school place isn't necessarily the best thing since sliced bread for every child.
    Signature removed for peace of mind
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