When should children start pre-school?

Tran

I know in many areas getting a child a nursery or pre-school place can be difficult so parents put their child's name down very early. i put my children's name's down when they were under 1 year old, but in my area there really aren't enough places for children.

I opted to send my eldest to the pre-school when he got to 2.5 as if felt it would mean he could mix with others and socialise. Also friends etc etc encouraged me to get him in pre-school as soon as possible. At 2.5 i had to pay for the pre-school place (it was £45 for the first half-term) and he went for 2 half days a week. I withdrew him at the first half term as it really was not suiting him. Everyone told me he was quite bright and forward (don;t all mums think that!)and mixed well with older children and so they encouraged me to send him at 2.5 However he wasn't emotionally ready for pre-school at 2.5.

He will get 3 year old funding from easter this year and i have put his name down to start then but after everyone telling me he needed to go at 2.5 i am starting to listen less to advice from other mums. I am considering not sending him at all, and only to school whenhe is actually 5. I think we send children too early into formal settings in this country. This is just my opinion and every child and every family finds out what works for them best.

Maybe the biggest thing is getting a pre-school place more than the age at which the child goes to pre-school. Certainally in areas lacking in pre-schools it is advisable to get your child's name down early so you have the option of pre-school if you want it.

jellyhead

about the nappies thing, i was given the impression it's because the staff aren't allowed to touch the children intimately. there aren't enough staff in most nurseries to be able to allow 2 members of staff to change a child together, with enough staff left behind to look after those left behind. presumably a child could manage pull ups by themself. the problem with my son was that his fine motor skills weren't good, he could barely feed himself and couldn't yet dress himself properly. he couldn't have used pull ups at age 3. i think maybe if his statement of special needs had come through more quickly he could have gone sooner because his one to one helper could have helped him in the toilet (unless of course there are rules preventing it). my son had special needs though, if a child was okay but just still in nappies i don't see how the staff would even know that they wore pull ups instead of underwear.

we were told in school that teachers aren't allowed to touch children, even if they cry or wet themselves. i have seen the rules being broken though, dinner ladies have helped change a child in reception who wet himself most days and i've seen little hugs when children are upset. the year one teacher even picks up one little girl and carries her into school on his hip, she hates school and has to be dragged through the door but doesn't mind him carrying her in.

jellyhead

by the way about the harry potter thing. my son was 6 but it was the end of year 2 so everyone else was 7. he read harry potter 3 in the classroom, not at home. we do have the books at home but they're for the grown ups lol! he's the best reader in his school year (according to the end of year exams), i didn't mean to sound like i was boasting or anything, or implying that all 6 year olds should be reading at that level. he really enjoys reading and it's nice for him to feel confident about something because although his exam results are good he's by no means an academic child. he struggles in school, he hates being in the top set (out of 2) and is of average intelligence, he just reads well.

3 other kids in his class had read HP3 so my son wanted to read it. it was a bit embarassing at the time, i'd started a huge rant about it on a parenting board, saying how much i hated seeing kids dragging HP5 into school and their parents gloating in the playground, boasting that they could read it. i'd said i'd never allow my 6 year old to read book 2, although book 1 was okay but book 2 was too grown up. not in a scary way, just that the themes are too old for a 6 year old, i though a child of 6 wouldn't 'take in' the story and would be better reading something aimed at kids their own age. although he'd read HP1 his favourite book at the time was the gruffalo lol! i was volunteering in year 3 and there were 4 kids all lugging the newly published HP5 into school, although all of these kids had already turned 8 they just weren't mature enough to understand the story and i thought it was sad that their mothers were so keen to push their reading ability into other people's faces. yes they were good readers but HP5 isn't intended for 8 year olds besides which why couldn't they read the book at home? sitting alone reading in the playground like a billy no mates doesn't impress the other children. at 7/8 years old i'd loved the famous 5 books, i don't think i'd have had much of a clue if i'd read HP5. i was reading the magic faraway tree mostly because my sister loved it but couldn't read it for herself. i'd learned to read at 3 but that's because i wanted to, not because my mum wanted me to. higher than average reading ability doesn't mean you should be reading books intended for older kids - there's no fun in that.

anyway, that was my rant and then spud came home and told me he'd finished HP3 that day. ho hum ... he's 8 and a half but we won't let him read book 4 yet. he's into the lemony snicket books now.