I am a Bridezilla and my confession is....

LisaJane

Roz_V wrote: »

I'm a bridezilla and my confession is that I threw a massive strop yesterday and threatened to cancel my hen do altogether because ANOTHER person has dropped out now that the time has come to pay up...

I wouldn't mind, but I asked everyone waaaaay back in October if they would be up for it and if they thought the cost was OK and everyone said yes and that the cost was brilliant. Since then, one girl has spoken to me and said she wouldn't be able to come which is fine, but the others haven't even bothered to tell me themselves, they've let me find out via mutual friends which I think is just rude TBH. :mad:

So now it's me, three friends, MIL2B, SIL2B, my mum & my 2 sisters and the cost may go up because I needed a minimum of 10 people. I thought that as I'd invited 20 the minimum number wasn't going to be an issue

Anyhow, woke up this morning and thought f*** 'em all! I'm going, and I'll have a fab time.

hey roz...almost exactly the same thing has happened to me. i need a minimum of 8 and had invited 17 so thought id be grand with it. i even made sure it was planned for close to home to that it would be handy for people. but because it's so handy, a number of people have said they can only come on the saturday and stay 1 night. i was absolutely ripping...partly because i was worried i wouldn't get 8 people minimum for the full weekend and partly because if it was the other way around and these people were getting married, i would be at their full hen do without taking even a second to think about it! some of them i consider to be very very good friends and i just couldn't get my head around why they would not want to be there for the whole thing!

thankfully a girl in work got married in march and had similar issues and was able to talk me out of my angry and upset state. and a similar thing also happened on a hen do i organised 2 years ago...we ended up having to invite a b team of people to make up the numbers!

so try not to take it personally...economically times are tough and what i've had to think is that not everyone is the same and would care as much as i do. some people just can't be bothered and/or don't want to spend the money, and that unfortunately is just the way they are and there is nothing you or i can do about it.

that turned into quite a rant! sorry about that!

lisa

Roz_V

LisaJane wrote: »

hey roz...almost exactly the same thing has happened to me. i need a minimum of 8 and had invited 17 so thought id be grand with it. i even made sure it was planned for close to home to that it would be handy for people. but because it's so handy, a number of people have said they can only come on the saturday and stay 1 night. i was absolutely ripping...partly because i was worried i wouldn't get 8 people minimum for the full weekend and partly because if it was the other way around and these people were getting married, i would be at their full hen do without taking even a second to think about it! some of them i consider to be very very good friends and i just couldn't get my head around why they would not want to be there for the whole thing!

thankfully a girl in work got married in march and had similar issues and was able to talk me out of my angry and upset state. and a similar thing also happened on a hen do i organised 2 years ago...we ended up having to invite a b team of people to make up the numbers!

so try not to take it personally...economically times are tough and what i've had to think is that not everyone is the same and would care as much as i do. some people just can't be bothered and/or don't want to spend the money, and that unfortunately is just the way they are and there is nothing you or i can do about it.

that turned into quite a rant! sorry about that!

lisa

Thanks Nice to know I'm not alone... I spent well over £250 each + spending money on three of their hen do's last year, and I gave seven months notice of the cost so people could have saved up and I asked if they were OK with the price before booking...

It's not even them not coming that has upset me most, I understand that times are tough - it was them not telling me personally - when I sent an email round saying the balance is due in a month, they told mutual friends that they couldn't come, and they then passed the message on to me.

BLUis

Wife zilla moment here too!!

I'm glad you didnt bother coming to my wedding I only invited you because my OH thought it would be polite. I didnt even notice you werent there until the next day when someone asked me if you had come. Oh and that lame excuse you sent me 2 days later?? Really? Is that the best you could come up with? Pathetic.

neilcrook

BLUis i was so angry the day after when i realised almost 30 people didn't show to the evening do! I was furious! you certainly find out who your friends are and who the a***holes are in the family!

Top tip to all - Ban Facebook! There were several pictures of me on Facebook before i was even married. Furious is an understatement.

daisiegg

I am feeling rather bridezilla-ish at the moment and just need to get it off my chest...

• OH has spent a total of about 15 minutes on anything wedding related since we booked the venue (he spent slightly longer than that on looking at venues with me) and I really really really want to get the Save The Dates out but I can't do it on my own
• My sister is being a maid of honour-zilla and I am not impressed.
• My cousin and his girlfriend (that my granda adores more than his own granddaughters) have announced they're getting married next summer, which is lovely and all, but every time he or his fiance post something wedding-related on Facebook it gets a million comments from family, who never comment on my wedding-related statuses and most of whom didn't even congratulate me on getting engaged. And now I know that everyone will compare our day with his, and they're going to be sooooo different....ours quite formal in a posh hotel, his very informal in a church hall with a hog roast...which is great....but I know so many of my family are 'reverse snobs' so they will look down on our 'posh' do and talk about how much better his is going to be. Grrrr.
• I just found out that another cousin (sister of the one who is getting married next year) is pregnant. I know I should not be annoyed at someone being pregnant. But.... she is younger than me, - I just typed a load of other stuff but it was too mean so I've deleted it!!. But I know that everyone is going to just act as though it's the best thing in the world and it will totally overshadow my wedding and even worse is the possibility of whether she will have a rush wedding this year now before the baby comes (our ultra-Catholic granda might just be that scary). Also.....I am the first of the cousins to get married and I really thought I'd be the first to have a baby too. So part of it is jealousy!!

Faith177

OMG I'm not the only one having melt downs. I am no longer alone in this lol

Ok my wind ups so far are

1) My MIL2B grrrrrr at this point in time I would be happy if she said she wasn't coming she has made it that obvious that she is not happy with the wedding. We choose (in 2010) to get married in Scotland in 2013 to be a bit diffrent. Firstly she wanted the OH to drive down to Birmingham to pick her and his brothers up the day before the wedding (10 hours EACH way!) Sorry but this is NOT happening we have enough to do that day. Her neighbour said they could fly with them. Apparently she doesn't like flying (she has NEVER even been near an airport btw) I asked her about this she said oh I just know I won't like it. Her second argument was she would have to by passports so I said no you can fly on a provisional licence. Her response why should I waste the money on something I'm only go to use once (I would like to point out she can't open her own bank account as she has NO photo id so it wouldn't be a use once thing). Then I mentioned the train or coach (8 hours train 12 coach) oh I don't like being cooped up that long. However she was originally willing to spend 10 hours in a car with 5 people plus luggage. Second thing she has not offered to help with anything with the wedding (apparently they can't afford it) I'm not intrested in her money just her input would be nice. Then she moaned that I had put the OH's name as Matt on save a dates not Matthew (NO-ONE calls him Matthew but her).

2) People who borrowed money off us as soon as we started saving for the wedding with the promise of paying us back. For example 1 week after I got a small loan for the wedding to buy some of the bigger things to get the bull rolling. My brother and his GF called my mum to ask if she would ask me if they could borrow "a couple of hundred" to pay for the deposit on their flat. I felt bad for them cause my mum was able to help me out when I brought my house so I told my mum no problem. My brother calls he actually wanted £770 how could I say no when I had already agreed (I felt really stitched up). This was June 10 they were meant to pay me back Jan 11 & I haven't seen a penny and they haven't even mentioned it to me. It's like if they ignore it it'll go away. My housemate isn't much better either

3) Uncooprative bridesmaids my brothers gf is also bridesmaid. She went to look at her dress on Saturday. Straight away started shouting at me that a) it would need altering (I pointed out that, that is why they would be measuring her so the dress will be to her measurments) no no even then it'll still need altering. b) the shop had ran out of the sample of the colour so they suggested she went on-line on the website the colour I have chosen is for some reason showing as green when it should be forget-me-not blue (that's my fault too apparently!) c) the dress is going to make her look "dumpy" as she can't carry off long dresses. I tried to get a dress that would suit all 3 bridesmaids and it was a nightmare!!!! 1 is size 22-24 the other (the one causing the issues) is in denial she says she is a size 16 no way a 20 at least the other is a size 12 and really tall!!!!

4) OH's brothers we asked them straight away (2010) for them to be ushers as it was important to me to have his family involved. They only told us in Jan this year that they now don't want to be ushers as a) one wears a hearing device and feels he wouldn't be able to do the role (he can hear perfectly well when he want's to with this device but he is a lazy so & so) the other says he is too shy

5) The OH and his stupid suggestions first we had ohhh I'm wearing a pink suit then it was no wait why don't the woman dress as men the men as women, then I'm not wearing a cravat there stupid (turned out he thought a cravat was the lacy front on a shirt) the list goes on. I want his imput but sensible suggestions only please lol

Wow ermmmm just read back all that I sound a right cow! I feel bad having all these complaints but they are just eating away at me and I need a rant lol

(hope you all won't judge me too harsly)

wanchai_2

Oh my God, huge hugs to you all, especially Faith, daisiegg and Roz!!! That all sounds totally nightmarish!! I am having a few BZ moments myself right now, will write about it when I've calmed down!Jenna (neilcrook) - I wouldn't go if I were you.

bride2be2012

why can't my MIL2B keep her nose out of anything!!!

OHs stag is this weekend, his eldest brother is best man. He just phoned just now to speak to OH who is away out, I asked if he was all organised for the weekend and he just kinda groans and said his mum has been moaning over the lack of organisation for the stag do! Why is she even getting involved?!

Im_A_Student

I've turned into a bridezilla with two and a half months to go because......

I'm annoyed that around 30 people haven't bothered to reply to the RSVP....apparently my OH's family just 'come' and don't need to 'RSVP'...Yes they do when we are paying per person!!! I think its really rude to not bother telling someone if you're coming or not. I feel like saying don't bother coming, I have 70 other people and I could do with knocking a few off the list! ;-)

katie1812

I never thought I'd ever be a bridezilla, but I think I'm bordering tonight. My fiance is out with the lads tonight (they are all part of our wedding party - best man and ushers) and I haven't really got to know them very well. I've met them a few times but they don't know much about me and considering they are paying quite a big part of the day I think it would be nice to go out for a few drinks or a meal or something. But I don't even get an invite.
Not only that, he came home to get changed earlier and declared that they want to go to Newcastle for his stag do. We agreed we were staying around where we live for our respective weekends... money and time and just generally prefer being near home. He should know now that I wouldn't react well to him going away yet it didn't seem to bother him one bit. I was pretty peed off to be honest, yet have no chance of getting anything out of him until tomorrow. Most probably I've over-reacted, wouldn't be the first time lol, but just feel that sometimes my voice is completely not heard!!