Letting someone down gently...

sheldon08

otmp wrote: »

He has, original email below

Hey xxxx,

How are you doing? I am quite fine myself.
I just wanted to say that you are a great girl and was wondering of
you would like to go on a date with me some time.
How do you feel about that?

Greetings,
xxxx

Then as other people have suggested I would be very clear from the outset....

Hi xxxx

I'm fine thanks, glad to see you are also.
That's nice of you to say so but I prefer not to date my friends. I hope you are enjoying your time in the UK and will see you online sometime.

DVardysShadow

ailuro2 wrote: »

Well you can't simply ignore it, but can you send him back a reply saying oi, Mr Dutchman, the word you're looking for isn't date it's "night out on the drink with a mate" and remind him that he knows by now you don't "date" fellow WoWers but you're happy to meet up with him when he's in town next. Of course make sure you take another mate with you when you go, as it's not a date is it?;)

sheldon08 wrote: »

Has he actually said it's a date? Couldn't you just be clear with him that as much as you don't mind meeting up for a drink (if you don't that is!) it will be as a friend only?

As he is Dutch, do just take into account the possibility that 'date' does not necessarily mean exactly the same to him as to L1 speakers of English.

otmp

Ok so what do we think of:


Hi xxxx,

I'm doing well thank you, work has been hectic but will hopefully calm down after half term when everyone is back in. Glad to hear you are also doing well.

That's nice of you to suggest it and while I enjoy being friends with you I don't want want to meet up as a date. I hope this won't be a problem and we'll continue to be friends.

otmp

DVardysShadow wrote: »

As he is Dutch, do just take into account the possibility that 'date' does not necessarily mean exactly the same to him as to L1 speakers of English.

Thing is, his English is extremely good and I would say he is 'integrated' with English/UK culture in as far as I know he watches a lot of ours/US television, I'm pretty sure he does mean it like we mean it but thanks for making me wary of that.

galvanizersbaby

otmp wrote: »

Ok so what do we think of:


Hi xxxx,

I'm doing well thank you, work has been hectic but will hopefully calm down after half term when everyone is back in. Glad to hear you are also doing well.

That's nice of you to suggest it and while I enjoy being friends with you I don't want want to meet up as a date. I hope this won't be a problem and we'll continue to be friends.

That sounds fine to me OP

pigpen

I would respond..

'hi,

Great to hear from you and so pleased things are going well.

I am very flattered by your invitation but unfortunately I am not looking to date anyone right now. I would love to keep in touch though and know how you are getting on!

How are the studies going? Then possibly some blarb about the game etc .. ask what level his paladin or his healer is at now

anyway, must dash, cat needs feeding/house just bust into flame/need to nip to buy milk before shop closes.

Take care
me!'

It says no kindly but firmly then keeps the opportunity for conversation open in the future and shows there is no animosity regarding the invitation.

Says I sitting beside my WoW geek ..

otmp

pigpen wrote: »

but unfortunately I am not looking to date anyone right now.

I'm wary of saying that because knowing my luck, if I do, my McDreamy will walk into my office tomorrow :rotfl:

galvanizersbaby

pigpen wrote: »

I would respond..

'hi,

Great to hear from you and so pleased things are going well.

I am very flattered by your invitation but unfortunately I am not looking to date anyone right now. I would love to keep in touch though and know how you are getting on!

How are the studies going? Then possibly some blarb about the game etc .. ask what level his paladin or his healer is at now

anyway, must dash, cat needs feeding/house just bust into flame/need to nip to buy milk before shop closes.

Take care
me!'

It says no kindly but firmly then keeps the opportunity for conversation open in the future and shows there is no animosity regarding the invitation.

Says I sitting beside my WoW geek ..

Mind you couldn't 'the not looking to date anyone right now' be interpreted as perhaps an opportunity for dating arising in the future? - hopefully not but he may be a persistant chap?!

sheldon08

galvanizersbaby wrote: »

Mind you couldn't 'the not looking to date anyone right now' be interpreted as perhaps an opportunity for dating arising in the future? - hopefully not but he may be a persistant chap?!

FWIW, I agree. That's too open ended IMO

pigpen

well the 'right now' could be substituted with 'in the near future'

I'd possibly just tell him I was gay, i've done that before today lol