Further financial faux pas and even more disasterous decisions

moo2moo

Yesterday was the day from hell. Quite probably the first of many. I feel utterly, exhausted every single thing is just too much and OH arriving home at 11am was not what I expected. Poor chap sat down to do something requiring an electricity bill and I bit his head off for asking where it was. Then I stormed upstairs to the place its been kept for the last decade and stormed back downstairs slamming it down in front of him. Can't believe how angry I am. On the plus side rather than then leaving the folder where it was when he'd finished with it, as would normally happen, he did go and put it back. Have spent far too long doing everything for him, or at least it feels that way.

Things degenerated into the mother of all rows which left me shaking and in tears. Again. Was over an hour late returning to work simply becasue I wasn't in a fit state to drive. Arrived home to find my dinner plated up ready to eat and the washig up done. Can't begin to explain what a difference those two little things make. Normally I'd walk in the door to a mountain of washing up and some left over pasta in the pan, if I was lucky. Mostly I'd need to cook something.

Seem to be capable of cleaning like a superhuman when I'm angry about things simply as a way of getting them out of my system. Managed four loads of laundry yesterday, folded, ironed and put everything away. Hoovered upstairs, cleaned out the fires and then tidied up lots of random stray stuff and chucked an awful lot of unnecessary stuff away. Its made a huge difference to the state of the house and it made a change to arrive back to something tidy.

OH and the DDs spent the evening in the garden and have moved all the logs from the improvised log store into the new one. The debris from the old one is now ready to go to the tip which I'll do this weekend if OH brings his car home rather than the company one.

Spent a rather unusual but very pleasant evening chating to OH about random things. Normally I can't get anything out of him that isn't a "Whatever" or do "whatever the !!!! you want" or him just ignoring me, staring at the wall or the ceiling, glass in hand, and randomly wandering off for a fag. So to sit and laugh felt most bizarre but in a very nice way.

Had a much better nights sleep only waking up once because the hound from hell had removed the circulation from my lower extremities by sprawling across my legs. Feel much more human this morning.

Plans for today involve a long day at school to make up for not being there for overly long yesterday. Won't be able to do much because there are builders and plumbers and floor fitters and decorators spread throughout the building. Pretty much everything is covered in a fine layer of dust but theres not a lot I can do about it whilst they're still making the mess but I need to get a few more hours in anyway.

Further plans for today involve lots more housework. Am finding it rather therapeutic in that its obvious I've achieved something with my day. Makes a difference not to spend an eternity trying to get wine stains off the furniture or the floor. I fear a spot of FlyLadying is required to focus my mind... also need to wash the annoying dollop of bird shoite off the front window providing it stops raining long enough. I'm enthusiastic but not that enthusiastic.

moo2moo

chevalier wrote: »

Out of interest do they do random alcohol/drug testing at OH work? Just wondering what would happen to his job if it turned out he was an alcoholic. Would he lose his job?
chev

Nope random testing isn't something that happens but if it did come to light he'd lose his job without question.

chevalier

moo2moo wrote: »

Nope random testing isn't something that happens but if it did come to light he'd lose his job without question.

I was wondering if this was part of the reason (subconsciously) for him not wanting to get help. Don't misunderstand me his behaviour is inexcusable, but it can't help that he know he really could lose everything if the job found out....

And as to yesterday. maybe you need to keep showing your anger, keep NOT avoiding confrontation...
chev

moo2moo

Problem is he he lost that job he wouldn't be allowed to work in that particular industry again. There isn't anything else he wants to do and he feels hes really hard done to in this particular job despite being paid for a full week but only working part time hours through the winter even with the travelling. Did wonder if boredom was a big part of the problem.

Things at work are only going to get more interesting. His boss (the useless disorganised one) is currently working from home following a bout of stupidity thats left him too badly injured to drive, not that hes off sick... just "working from home" not that anyone can get hold of him. Meanwhile the same chap has just been promoted and will be cramming the job he currently does in 5 days into two in order to do the same job elsewhere in the country. His underling goes on hoilday at the end of this week meaning theres no supervision at all... and so the new chap starts at the weekend only theres no one around to sort out his paperwork or do any form of training which means hes destined to spend two weeks in the office doing nothing as the rest of the chaps will be running round trying to cover the absence created by the management being off work. Either OH will see it as a challenge and do something about it or he'll be a right git.

elantan

Glad you had some fun and laughter .... And no wine stains to get out is a deff plus

Lula-Hula

Hi Moo,

dont know what to say really other than, I've been there with an alcoholic OH; it sucks & you & DDs deserve a much better life.

Thinking of you
xx

mummychicken

Hi Moo,
Just caught up with your week, really sorry to read how rough things are for you at the moment, stay strong and i hope you can sort through it all.

moo2moo

I had another great day. Did loads of things that I've been putting off for months. Daft things like wiping mud splats off walls and shifting grubby fingermarks from obscure places. The house is becomming clean and tidy remarkably quickly considering that I haven't put much more time into housework than normal. I actually feel like I'm getting somewhere at long last. Even managed to sleep through the night without being disturbed so I feel fabulous, still look rough but its going to take a while for that to sort itself out.

OH on the otherhand had an awful day and is beginning to suffer the side effects of abstinance coupled with a cold. Came home from school to find him watching a film. Such a normal thing yet something he hasn't done in years. Hes even started listening to the radio instead of the same three CDs on repeat play.

Plans for the day involve a trip to Mr Ts but not until much later. Will continue with the house blitz by erradicating all traces of spiders from the many nooks and crannies. First though I have to tackle DD2s room in the hopes of unearthing the feather duster because I've been unable to find it anywhere else.

elantan

Glad your having some great things happening for u just now .... Getting a good night sleep can make a huge difference ... Hope oh keeps up his hard work

chevalier

I am keeping my fingers crossed for you. I am looking for your diary each day at the moment, cos i am concerned about you.
chev