Further financial faux pas and even more disasterous decisions

moo2moo

Yesterday was a disaster. The world came to an end. I had a crisis to end all crises. I came downstairs to discover the unexpected demise of the PC modem. No amount of cajoling, threatening or nicking of suitable power supplies from other gadgets could persuade it to work and believe me I tried everything. Resorted to texting OH at 6:30 which resulted in a boomerany phone call... I never send texts... before he'd even read the thing .... meh... still he detoured to computer heaven and came home with a swanky new one capable of running on fibreoptic broadband. Note the likelihood of us getting fibreoptic broadband is about as likely as BT fixing the rainwater ingress to the phone line that means the entire road loses phones everytime it rains or its vaguely damp outside.

I did learn one thing though. I spend far far far too much time on the internet. Considerably more time than I thought I did. Whilst I enjoy my hours ramble every morning as a fab way to clear the detritus from my brain, I did discover quite how much other stuff can be achieved in that same time frame and so I am the proud owner of half a shiny kitchen. In fact if I get my bum in gear I may well discover the other half is equally shiny beneath all the mud splatters at some point much later today.

Seem to be fighting against the tide again though. Everytime I clear something OH dumps something else there. The DDs tend to dump everything in the hallway outside their rooms because its relatively safe from the puppy and because OH can't see it they won't get told off.

Meanwhile OH is gradually getting back to normal. He and the DDs have appointments this evening and so hes swapped his shift for the day to clash with them. Whilst theres a v. slim possiblility he'll be home in time this is about as likely as Yeovil Town winning the FA Cup (note I'm not even entirely sure Yeovil even has a "town" team...) on the bright side I can leave school to take them but in making the time up it looks like I'll be stuck there until around 8pm. Still at leasst my job is flexible enough to do this. Am so very tired though. Really don't appreciate being woken up just so that he can tell me hes ready to perform the horizontal tango whenever I'm in the mood. Clearly after I've been asleep for an hour is never going to be the greatest time in the world. Muppet.

Plans for today involve much housework... with the intention of actually doing much housework in the hopes of clearing out some of the trash thats gathering. Can see it taking me most of the day just to rehome the junk. Will probably take considerably longer than expected since OH will be home until after lunch which normally makes things take twice as long.

Will need to hit a supermarket towards the end of the week before the animals run out of food.

moo2moo

Arrived home to find OH had washed up and had a mini tidy up of the kitchen. Boots order arrived so even though I knew what was in it and equally that none of the contents were for me I v. excitedly opened it only to discover one of the sealed gift sets was mising bits. Most annoying. OH was in helpful mode so we pootled out for some quality time together in the hopes of exchanging it for another one only our local Boots didn't have any in stock and so refunded me in full fo rit. Major result as this was one of the 3 for 2 offer things. So it really means that his brothers christmas present (which was already a fiver cheaper than elsewhere) came with a free £20 smellies gift set and £12 of points.

Pootled over to the v. expensive Game in the hopes of finding something for the DDs for Christmas. The result was a new Wii Links crossbow game and gun, Mario Karting with two steering wheels, a Wii classic controller (for playing those games where the Wii mote is a pain in the bum) and a nunchuck. Better still I got change out of £50. Am most happy. DD2 will be getting Mario Karting for her birthday. Hope I get that lucky with the rest of the X-mas gifts..... meanwhile if anyone can recommend 1st person shoot 'em ups for the Wii which don't involve zombies I would be most grateful.

Tesco_points_addict

Echoooooooooooooo echo echo echo.........

moo2moo

Tesco_points_addict wrote: »

Echoooooooooooooo echo echo echo.........

Could quite possibly be being thick here.. but since it is 3am I guess thats permissible..... is the cryptic post a reference to tumble weed or a sense of de ja vu... been here and seen it all beforeness?

Meanwhile the sort of 3am surfing that only happens when your brain is on autopilot led to the discovery of girlie shoes that I actually like. ShoeGal look away now! Clicky

moo2moo

Plans today undoubtably involve a spot of sanding and sufficient woodfiller to eradicate the teeth marks left on a dining chair when the puppy decided to see if it was edible. Doubt she'll be doing that againin a hurry.

Found two Wii games for OHs stocking. Just need to come up with another couple of bits for him and I'm sorted. Meanwhile discovered him searching for rubber ducks to go on my car dashboard. !!!!!! for I haven't got a clue. Must come up with something asap and drop some pretty hefty hints to divert potential disaster. Unfortunately I haven't got a clue. Well I do but I doubt a personality transplant is on the cards. Still need to do something. I really can't go on like this and yes I know I've said this many times before. Watching from the outside in the solution is easy. The reality is considerably harder. Still not convinced quite what to do for the best. Even debated marriage guidance councelling but if whats going on in my head exits via my mouth the end result won't be pretty and being a control freak I'd like to have a cunning plan in place prior to saying something than have to deal with the aftermath of a foot in mouth situation on the fly. All sounds v. cryptic doesn't it.

Plans for life at the moment seem to centre on getting thorough the day with some semblence of normaility, but when I arrive home at 6:30 knowing OH has only been in for an hour but has still managed to sink the first of two bottles of wine, its much easier said than done. Sadly he doesn't seem able to grasp that I can't live with the drinking and the drivel he spouts once hes drunk. I don't like that person and I don't want it in my life or the DDs lives. For the momment I appear to be stuck with it though. He doesn't see anything at all wrong with it. Apparently its all for my benefit after my rather excessive reaction to his suggestion of the performance of the horizontal tango on a specific night at a specific time. He saw it as a solution to his problems whilst I viewed it as being forced to do something that I dodn't want to do. Things seem to have gone down hill rapidly since then.

Bleugh thats far too negative for first thing in a morning. So taking a deep breath and thinking positive thoughts I'm going to start the day with a cafetiere of posh coffee because I am worth it! Then I'm going to finish cleaning the kitchen because I appreciate the lack of mess even if no one else does!

mooomin

*Huggity hug hug*

Remember, there's a couch covered in cats in The North if you need to really escape for a day or two. You would always be welcome.

lucielle

Could you tape him when he's in full rant mode and then play it back when he's sober?
L

MrsMoo2U

Big hugs. Hope that the coffee was a little oasis of calm and collection in your day to come.

if it helps you to know, when I was in a similar situation (albeit not alcohol induced just major bully and controlling) I knew for a long time that I needed to do "something" I just didnt know what that something was. It took a while for things to fall into place. One morning I woke up and knew that today was the day and I had some strength to do whatever it took. Initially I took myself off for a long weekend to a friend at the other end of the country. Being around her helped me to build the strength I needed for the months to come. Things just started to happen from there.
You may just need space to work out what your course of action is. In the meantime Cheery Daff has recently being talking about a meeting that she goes to Al Anon, it is for people who are affected by friends and relatives drinking. They support each other to help them see their way through. No judgements, no advice just a place to voice things out loud so they start to make sense. Perhaps you could find something similar near to you and (if you can) go along. It is completely confidential. You can also go to relate on your own, it gives you the space to talk things through about how you are feeling and to work out the best approach.
The sad thing is that, no matter how much you love the "real" person you sometimes have to go through a lot of rubbish to get that person back if they are able to come back. Likewise, sometimes you have to let somebody go before they can mend themselves.

I really hope that you can find your way through soon. But take strength in knowing that you will get there when you are strong enough to deal with it.

Big hugs

Eager_Elephant

Hi Moo

I think TPA was saying echo because you posted the same thing twice and not because we have been here before!!

If you need a little break you could come over to East Anglia, I have no spare beds as such but with a bit of jiggling we could fit you and the DD's in.

You would all fit right in with all our animals except we don't have any dogs although my brother has 3 plus 6 puppies at the moment!!

I have no real comment to make as my marriage has been as bad sometimes (but not alcohol), I can recommend marriage counselling - It was really good but made me realise a lot of things and some of the things my DH said was quite shocking but after a lot of thinking I realised he was right.

Hope you manage to work things out.

(((Moo)))

EE

Mags_cat

When the balance swings (and sticks) from being mostly good to mostly *bleugh* then you'll know you need to act.

And what they all said - we're listening and I reckon we're all here for you.

x